Faders: What do you say?

by Mad Sweeney 30 Replies latest jw friends

  • Quillsky
    Quillsky

    From one fader (my project is completed) to another fader, I suggest you flick that switch in your head that makes you want to tell people that you're a JW.

    Figure out what you are now, Christian, no religion, whatever.... and that's what you should tell people.

  • TastingFreedom
    TastingFreedom

    My admise to you, DA, and get it over with!

    If I could it all over again, I would DA. I faded and then was confronted with evidence for apostacy, ended up getting DF'ed. It caused too much anxiety. Looking back I should have just cut off everything from the very beginning and save me a lot of trouble. It's painful either way, no doubt about it.

    If my arm has Gangrene , it's inevitable that you're going to lose it, even if you keep putting band-aids... if you don't cut it off, the infection can spread until it kills you. Not cutting the ties with toxic people will eventually kill your individuality.

    Too much drama, and too much crap to deal with it. Move on! Get them out of your system, forget about them, don't give a damn what they say or think. Live your life! Don't let them have power over you anymore.. We gave them enough time.

    Anyway, just my .02 cents. My personal advise.

  • flipper
    flipper

    MAD SWEENEY- Don't blame yourself. This JW sucked you in with the perfect bear trapper hatchet question " What religion are you ? " Once you said " witnesses " this JW dropped the hatchet with questions. Hey man, it could happen to anybody. That being said- it's not the end of the world.

    There are ways you can keep this JW drone at a distance from you when you see him or her by just staying evasive. You aren't obligated to engage this person in details about your life. The WITNESS feels obligated to try to bring you back to meetings and intrude - but that's his or her issues - not yours. You don't HAVE to cooperate. Just tell the person you stopped attending due to personal reasons and some depression. Just say you'd rather not talk about it- it's personal. And leave it at that. When you are forced to engage with this person just keep it at a professional level - nothing says you owe this person anything or they have carte blanche access to your life. That's a JW and WT society myth- they DON'T deserve access to our life. So just keep it business and don't give out details and I bet the witness will back off. Just my 2 cents. Good luck, hang in there, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • wasblind
    wasblind

    tell him that to your knowledge, Jehovah loves everyone

  • wasblind
    wasblind

    Oh and tell him the reason you know this is because he allowed his only begotten son to die for everyone not just some.

  • VampireDCLXV
    VampireDCLXV

    I feel your pain Mad Sweeney. The paranoia really gets to you sometimes, huh? Ya gotta wonder if it'll ever stop. Maybe you should have told them you're a Devil worshiper instead. Hang in there!

    V665

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    I tell people that I'm done with it and don't want to go back. Keeping it real.

  • Found Sheep
    Found Sheep

    some how you may omit the JW smell cuz that is a question you ask when you THINK someone has a JW conection. It takes time to get the drug out of your system. Read Coc from Raymond Frans and heal from them. They are Wrong and you need to live life the way God wanted you to

  • yknot
    yknot

    Well you know this person is going to come up bouncing to you next time!

    So appear to get all emotional...... tell them you are inactive because of some discovered revelations regarding the WTS history and claims but the Elders have told you to keep your mouth shut and to wait on Jah. You don't want to ruin your relationship with Jehovah nor get yall both stumbled so you think it is best that yall don't associate. Hug the JW, ask them to pray for you and walk away.

    If they try again...... ask the JW if they want both of yall getting DFd and having no hope of resurrection?

  • sherah
    sherah

    I feel ya, Mad Sweeney. Believe me, you will eventually get to a mental place as fader will you will not care what active dubs think of you.

    I work with at least and see many during my commute. I speak and keep it moving. The ones on my job know "something" is "off" with me so they avoid me, this is cool with me. It's against policy to talk religion on the job but if a question concerning my affliation comes up, here are few that have worked for me - I'm a lapsed or non-practising JW OR I was raised a JW.

    In your situation, I probably would've thanked them for the invitation and steered the conversation on non-dub related stuff. Don't give them any hope of your returning by reminising on people, places and events you have in common in the JW world. As you found out, it brings up feelings of guilt and anxiety.

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