I agree, wasblind, that no discipline is what is wrong with kids today. But there are better ways than spanking that have been proven to work better. Like I said, my wife owned a daycare. She COULDN'T spank. And ALL of her kids were VERY well behaved.
Child beating
by Quillsky 110 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse
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mrsjones5
My parents used corporal punishment with their kids when I was small. My father would discuss with us what we did, we would receive our spanking and would be sent to our rooms. My father didn't make a habit of hitting us in anger, except for once when I was 15 and I said something that he didn't like and he slapped me (that was the last time he ever laid a hand on me). My mother was a different story, she angered easily, anything could set her off. Once when I was 5 she whooped (slang for spanked) me with a hairbrush, luckily it broke before she could do any damage. I would consider that abuse. Mother continued hitting us until I was 16 when she reared back to slap me and I gave her a look that made her stop in her tracks and think again about what she was going to do. I think that day I would have hit back.
I whooped my kids occasionally when they were small, never in anger and never when they were babies or toddlers (neither did the hubby). I stopped cuz taking things away was so much easier and I would get the behavior I wanted without the hitting. My husband has had a problem with appropriate disciplining because of the way he was raised (extreme abuse by his mother - beating with fan belts and anything else his mother could get her hands on) and he couldn't separate anger from the discipling our children . I've had to step in a few times when things got scary. I've had to get to the point where my husband admitted he was scared of me to make him stop and think about what he was doing. He's gotten better, still flashes sometimes but he knows I will take him out if I have to. I blame his mother.
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SweetBabyCheezits
How old are your kids, BD?
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cyberjesus
Using physical force to educate only shows our inability to educate. Show children and adults respect and the children will learn how to respect.
If we spank a kid to make a point, they learn that to make a point someone with authority has the "right" to spank to make a point... really? and it shows that we just dont have any other way to make a point... our lack of tools of child rearing.
Hitting someone who can't defend himself is an act of cowardice. The WT taught us parents to be cowards. If we speak and reason with a children the will learn to speak and reason with you.
Children dont want to disobey or be disrespectful. They like to test the boundaries, they want to learn the limits in life. Teaching them the limits by example works like a charm. Kids want attention and sometimes they settle with the attention we give them by force.
The other day I saw a woman slap her 5 year old in the face. the kid raised his hand automatically.... she said "dont you dare raise your hand at me"
Children are just inexperienced little human beings, but they are eager to learn. Teach a kid that NO ONE should ever use violence against them and they will learn that.
We are ALL EQUAL and have the SAME rights, little kids just dont know it yet.
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wasblind
Wow Brotherdan,
your wife had a job on her hands, I believe a child should be shown love first by, explaining to them why the should do something, a warning should be given, after that, that butt is mine.
My mom always warned us first, after that, that was our decision to hand our butts over to her.
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brotherdan
Cheeze, my kids are 5 years old and 6 months old.
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brotherdan
Strong woman, Mrs Jones! Tell your husband whose boss!
Respect!
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cyberjesus
I tend to give a nice smack on the butt because that is where it hurts less but still gets their attention.
why not smack them in the head.... the message will arrive to the brain faster, using that logic.
Now if you are looking for his attention....... have you tried of going down looking at them straight in the eyes and explaining them what you want? Is spanking in the butt the less painful way to get their attention that you can think of?
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wasblind
Cyberjesus, how many children do you have?
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skeeter1
I heard of one church that advocated "Men should hang a whip in the household as a warning to unruly wives?" (I think the women of that church should put some castration instruments on the bedroom walls.) At least the WTS never directly said that!
THe problem with hitting a kid, is that it's wrong. The parents can't stop at just hitting and turn to beating. The parents don't know how to resolve things better, and the kids learn that violence is the means to resolve problems and get one's way. The kid grows larger then the parents, and the parents can't control the kid becuase the parent hasn't developed problem solving skills beyond mere physical force. And, now the physical force tables are tipped to the adolescent child's favor.