You could email him a copy of the project I did a couple of years ago. The link is on Randy Watter's site here: http://www.freeminds.org/category/1-books.html
Please help me on my JW father who WILL NOT leave me ALONE
by skeeter1 45 Replies latest jw experiences
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oldlightnewshite
Just keep responding to his emails with 'can you write to me with your reasoning without the use of ANY passages from Watchtower articles or books. If he eventually gets it, and starts to do research without the WT$ indoctrinated stuff, maybe he'll learn something and come to his senses.
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Nickolas
I am really thinking of asking him to stop. If he does not respect my wishes (which he will not), then I will call his elders so they can counsel him.
Seems from your submission that you have already asked him to stop, many times. It could be you have already identified a strategy yourself. The question might be, however, would the elders actually counsel your father to stop prosthelytizing you? Perhaps not. Your father would likely agree to set up a meeting with you and the elders. If at that meeting you were to confront them in a controlled and confident manner with all the stuff you know about the WTBTS and how much you want to be left alone, would they not be more likely to instruct your father accordingly?
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Think About It
If he is still Pioneering, then he's probably getting alot of his hours by writing these letters and/or e-mails. Also, probably a way to keep convincing himself that the religion is the truth. Let him write these, because it will at least keep him off the street doing more d2d. Just scan through them to see if he actually mentions anything important and write back when you feel like it on how he is doing and what is going on in your family's life.
Think About It
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yknot
Wow
He is a tough cookie to crack!
And avoiding the topics makes him more rabid.....
So stop avoiding them, fight fire with fire....
Dangle the carrot (remember he is in a cult and carrots are common motivational tools)
Tell him you don't believe but are willing to give re-consideration if he is willing to take the journey with you....
Start by sending him some 'chucky/nelson' magazines, progress into books and basically just keep to the chronological order of publication output (when you come to a 'revised' edition re-study it with Pops). Discuss thoroughly the contents and keep notes of 'timeline' development so you can remind him what you covered, which publication and the interpretation.
Ya that is time consuming but it is like giving a child a distraction at the meetings to keep them quiet......... occupy his efforts in converting you productively.
BONUS: It educates him about our history!
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Joey Jo-Jo
Tell him that Jehovah wants only genuine interested people and that you would only do it for him if it will make him happy but not for Jehovah.
In your dad's way of thinking his intentions are good and he would like to see you turn back to JW happy land, I have the same problem with my old folks.
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GrandmaJones
I am not a qualified mental health person, but I did used to volunteer at the mental health center. I agree that his behaviour smacks of OCD. If that is the case, (and I am not saying it is, only that it might be, as other posters suggest) I think it has been fed by the org. A couple of years ago at the summer assembly, they had a big part on unbelieving relatives. They brought out a story of Noah and the Ark, and how SEVEN DAYS BEFORE THE RAIN BEGAN THE DOOR WAS CLOSED. (read those caps in a reeaallly SCARY, LOUD voice! They did.) and then basically insist that they are the FIRST ones we should try to persuade!
All the JW's in my hall immediately began campaigns to rush to conversion. Calls, letters, barrages of information. My mom (also elderly, has been all over her unbelieving brother, sending letters, cards, literature, etc. She doesn't want to be BLOODGUILTY (read bloodguilty in a scary voice too!) before Jehovah. I can't imagine how crazy it could get with someone a little offbalance.
Write back and cite Mal 3:6 (it won't paste, but it is the "Return to me and I will return to you, says Jehovah of Armies, and you are the sons of Jacob, you have not come to your finish" or something close to that effect.
Maybe tell him that (here's a good scripture) John 10:27
My sheep listen to my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. 28 And I give them everlasting life, and they will by no means ever be destroyed, and no one will snatch them out of my hand
Maybe tell him that it is in Jehovah's hands now....that your dad has done his part....
That the only idea I can come up with.....also, I wouldn't drive myself nuts reading all his emails. I agree with a lot of the posters who advise to send him friendly emails once a week, all chatty and happy, and just don't discuss his. (After all, you haven't read them!)
Good luck with a very difficult problem.
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GrandmaJones
Okay, I don't know what I did wrong with that post!!!!!
Let's try Mal again
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GrandmaJones
Okay, I just give up.....I am ruining this page....
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AGuest
Greetings, dear Skeeter1... and peace to you!
I am not a mental therapist, either, but I don't think your dad is suffering from OCD. Rather, I believe he is suffering... from a very bad conscience... as a result of how he USED to be and how he USED to treat people... and animals... and is now trying to work out his salvation (as the WTBTS has led him to believe he should). Since he's getting up in years, death is imminent and his mortality is staring him in the face... and he's having great issues dealing with that. That, however, isn't really YOUR problem... other to the extent he is making it yours.
You could try:
1. "Managing" his emails by tagging them as "junk" and then simply empty your junk box every so often; or
2. "Delete" without opening, as others have suggested (or send to "junk" if your system has the feature that allows you to send "inbox" stuff TO "junk" so that it recognizes emails from your ad AS junk from that point on); or
These two would show the ultimate demonstration of love on your part. You simply "let" him do what he believes HE needs to do to have some kind of peace during the last part of his days.
Or, 3. If you have not already, just kindly and lovingly ask him to stop (your post seems to indicate that you haven't quite done that, yet - maybe now's the time). Perhaps even tell him that you understand WHY he NEEDS to do it, but you really cannot be a part of it as you do not welcome the information.
If you try No. 3 and that doesn't work...
4. Send him a copy of this thread, particularly your post. Preface it with, "Dad, I really didn't know what to do and so I asked some friends and here's how they say I should handle your constant email. I don't WANT to delete/junk/stop all of your email but you've really given me no choice. I've asked you to stop but either you don't want to... or can't. So, maybe this will help you see how I feel about it. If you love me, then you really MUST respect my wishes... and stop. Otherwise, I won't be able to accept anything from you, even if it's NOT related to the WT. If you believe I will join you one day, great. I don't think so, but I am flattered that you do. In the meantime, however, I really don't want to hear about it."
I hope you and your father come to a mutually acceptable agreement.
Your servant and a slave of Christ,
SA