In the context of this discussion the motives of those doing good deeds absolutely matters. Is it done with an eye to the carrot or the stick, or is it done with completely free will?
As for angry Atheists, again, if we respond to being told we are going "through a phase", or well now that all of God's laws have shaped society you can take him out of the equation, or we are only Atheists because we have not been "touched" by God, or any of a dozen other equally condescending comments, we are labeled as angry. This doesn't even address the legislation or evangelizing that we are supposed to ignore.
That Arthur Brooks book is flawed and skewed. I can't believe people are still referencing it. Do you really think the people who put 5 bucks in the contribution box at the back of the hall or give to the Catholic church building fund are being more, or even equally, charitable than someone who takes meals to the elderly or volunteers at the local shelter? Gives to Veterans groups or breast cancer research?