Very points from both sides.
I think however that when dealing with ex-JWs, one needs to consider the possibility that even when some of us choose a different belief or philosophy, the way we chose it might itself need some revision. Did we follow Watchtower ways to reach our new conclusions? I know that for the first decade after leaving the Witnesses that I was constantly doing that.
I am a supporter of all free uses of one's consicence. Though I am a theist, I have strong ties and great love for friends and family who are atheist. I hate how they are constantly demonized and reduced to cookie-stamp charicatures and marginalized. But I do notice a striking difference between them and many ex-JWs who become atheists.
Regardless of where we land after we leave the Watchtower, make sure we land using our feet and no other support we were taught to use while in the grips of the Governing Body thought machine.
Questions to consider along this line:
1. Many claim there is no “God” in the Judeo/Christian sense. Does this mean that no other type of deity can, has, or will ever exist? What does science officially have to say on the matter?
2. Have we ever been chased down by someone we did not know but had been trying to get our attention for some time? Does the fact we did not know about this person or what they were doing prove their non-existence or did it just prove we didn’t know the person existed?
3. Name that which does not exist that humans debate about and take as seriously as the “God-issue.” How many of these things exist? How many of them have changed history? Is this unique or just one other superstition among many?
4. Do we have emotion invested in our non-belief about God? How much emotion do we have invested in other things that don’t exist? List them.
5. Is the scientific method intended to be a means to answer all questions? Offer your hypothesis, and then use it to prove to a loved one who questions your fidelity and love and see how far you get. Explain in detail what occurred when you did this, and then allow your results to be tested by others willing to try the same during their own lovers' spat. Sit back and see what happens.
6. Is our rejection of God based on what the Watchtower taught us was God or is it based on a complete relearning of the great religions? If it based on this relearning process, could our knowledge be sufficient to allow us to pass an exam on religion and philosophy offered on the college level? Did we apply methods we learned from the Watchtower to do our studying or did we first retrain ourselves to study and learn with time-proven academically sound ways? Did our conclusion leave us with a similar “dislike-all-who-don’t-agree-with-my-convictions” attitude that the Watchtower have or did it humble us and change our attitude for the way we view others who apply their conscience in other ways than we do?
Just food for thought.