I will return to the borg because.....

by cyberjesus 31 Replies latest jw friends

  • wobble
    wobble

    My sister, a pioneer for over forty years, speaks another language , not just fluently, but very very well, several native speakers of the languge have told me she speaks it better than them !

    She told me that , and remember she never says anything against the WT, the language teaching done by the WT is superficial, enough to preach a bit and stuff some literature in to someones hand, but not good enough if you want to hold down a job say, in that country.

    The poster who was going back to learn a language was wasting his/her time.

  • finallysomepride
    finallysomepride

    I'm going back when I'm a senile old bugger, so I can mistake the bookroom for the toilet & piss all over the literature trash

  • Murray Smith
    Murray Smith

    11. To wear a speedo to all the congregation picnics and softball games.

    hahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahaah . . . . . . and don't forget to take your sign to the assembly . . . you know . . . the one saying "MILLIONS NOW LIVING WILL NEVER GET LAID"

    hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha . . .

  • Stealth
    Stealth

    Because my spouse will not put out otherwise.

    Because I love wearing cheap suits.

  • watersprout
    watersprout

    1. To have my mind washed clean from ''normal'' thought patterns.

    2. To have a new outfit for each day of the assembly.

    3. To walk the streets knocking on empty houses.

    4. To read mind numbing books and magazines because it will make God love me.

    5. To become a judgemental, critical little s*@t.

    6. To disregard Christ and put the gb in His place.

    7. To live each day waiting for armageddon.

    8. To rejoice when there is a natural disaster and people die cause God is getting rid.

    9. To be told what to wear, eat, watch, read.

    AND MOST OF ALL

    10. To be sent insane and lose my mind completely!

  • the-illuminator81
    the-illuminator81

    To quickly rise through the ranks, become a CO and make hundreds of people feel guilty about touching themselves.

  • streets76
    streets76

    To help curb my masterbation habit.

  • nancy drew
    nancy drew

    I'm addicted to cults and when I'm not in one and i walk down the street I feel a strong compulsion to scream "the end is near you're all going to die" and when I see doors to houses or apts a powerful desire comes over me to start knocking.

  • Vidiot
    Vidiot

    PublishingCult - "To wear a speedo to all the congregation picnics and softball games."

    So THAT's why they pulled the plug on "congregation" events back in the 90s... It was all YOUR fault.

  • I quit!
    I quit!
    To save money in clothing since they give away cloths in conventions

    Are you sure this wasn't a Salvation Army convention? I don't remember them giving anything away at conventions except crazy religious teachings and bad advice.

    I love Publishing Cults reasons for going back. Finally some good reasons to attend meetings again. Along those lines I was thinking it might be fun to go back and always refer to Jehovah as Mr. Jehovah. You could stand at the back and greet people by saying: Mr Jehovah welcomes you" and begin you Watchtower comments with: "Mr Jehovah says.......

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