LoseControl, welcome to the forum. Best wishes on your journey. Many here can sympathize with your situation and you will hear a wide range of advice - some good, some not so good.
Though tedious to slog through, I encourage you to read DJeggnog's posts. For me, his posts were an eye opener, as the elders in my small town congregation were (relatively) humble men, who I believe were trying to suppress the ego, not stroke it. This "elder" hangs around the forum to puff himself up about how "instrumental" he is in the organization and has claimed that counsel to avoid ex-JW forums does not apply to him. (I can link to examples of his claims, if you wish.) He makes an excellent study in cognitive dissonance and demonstrates how a lack of critical thinking is dangerous.
DJEggnog: They each of them have their own god; they are each of them, in fact, laying gifts of bitterness, discontent and even slander at the feet of their own selfish desires to which they are vigorously giving worshipful devotion, for they have totally abandoned Jehovah for a number of reasons, envy being one of them.
DJ, your comments here remind me of this passage by H.L. Mencken:
"The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out for himself, without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane and intolerable, and so, if he is romantic, he tries to change it. And even if he is not romantic personally he is very apt to spread discontent among those who are."
DJEggnog: I've had a similar experience, but I left that congregation because at that time my fiery personality might have eventually led to be laying one of them out. (I'm a pretty big guy.)
LoseControl, notice this is just a mild example of this "elder's" ego-stroking.