Does Looks Really Matter? (page 6)

JanH

Lilacs,

Jan, the illusion, is how the man portrays himself to the woman. That is how we end up with bad men.

Dating is a form of advertising, so of course both put their best foot forward so to say. But given how women are, men are likely to portray themselves as more of a jerk than they really are.

The real illusion is women thinking "I can change him!"

Of course, women also knows that to get a man, she has to feign to be much more obsessed with sex than she really is. And she does. Like, everybody's a self-described slut in the chatroom here .

It is not for nothing they say the food most likely to cause frigidity in females is wedding cake

- Jan
--
- "How do you write women so well?" - "I think of a man and I take away reason and accountability." (Jack Nicholson in "As Good as it Gets")

Sorry to disappoint you, Jan, but in my last relationship, which lasted 3 years,I was accused of wanting sex TOO MUCH! Can you imagine? A young, 36 year old guy, telling me he thought I should slow down...he thought I wanted too much?

I think that is a sterotype. I know for a fact that one of my best friends is so unhappy in her marriage now, she is actually thinking about divorce. Her and her husband lived together for about 2 years and she said the sex was great. Well, she told me after they got married, he just falls asleep and won't pay attention to her. She calls me crying. Saying she put on sexy lingerie for him, and met him at the door, but he just went and turned on the TV. She is thinking of having an affair.

Men don't have a monopoly on wanting a lot of sex. And I don't think most of the women here are "feigning" their interest. I know I'm not!

April

If you bury the truth under the ground, it will but grow, and gather to itself such explosive power that the day it bursts through it will blow up everything in its way.--Emile Zola, J'accuse
http://www.network54.com/Forum/171905

cellomould

It is not for nothing they say the food most likely to cause frigidity in females is wedding cake

lol lol lol JanH!

But like Tatiana says, men are the same way. Maybe they wait till later in the marraige, but they do cool off. That has to suck for their wives.

Women and men are both notorious also for showing a sense of humour in public, but having none at home once married.

cellomould

"In other words, your God is the warden of a prison where the only prisoner is your God." Jose Saramago, The Gospel According to Jesus Christ

IMBlueFire

Women and men are both notorious also for showing a sense of humour in public, but having none at home once married.
cellomould

cello...it's not just women...

When we were dating...my then future husband and I would laugh at everything! He had the greatest sense of humor, he'd even wanna tell jokes in public!

I think it was about three weeks after our wedding that I noticed he began to mute all commercials and look away during reruns of the Three Stooges...by the third month, he no longer would even glance at his Mad magazine. I knew something was wrong.

I tried everything...even resorting to slapstick, to no avail. The humor was gone in our marriage.

I tried to giggle alone once when I knew he'd be watching...but, he turned away in disgust.

*sigh* I am embarrassed to say, but...recently I have been laughing with other men on the Internet. I know it's wrong...but, there's all this pent up hilarity.

Blue (of the closet giggling class)

Tatiana

There's a reason for that saying, "The couple that plays together, stays together!"

If you can't laugh with each other, you'll end up crying.

April

If you bury the truth under the ground, it will but grow, and gather to itself such explosive power that the day it bursts through it will blow up everything in its way.--Emile Zola, J'accuse
http://www.network54.com/Forum/171905

jesussaves

Every guy I have ever dated has had 'character' to his face. Hated those pretty boys! The thing that attracted me to my husband was this huge scar that he has from his hairline to his eyebrow. I wondered how he got it. When I was a teenager, I had a thing for getting crushes on the most unlikely teachers. Mr. Seidman was balding and he liked wearing this tight green turtleneck. The man had a wonderful mind. Mr. Stern was my geometry teacher, he was a little bald guy that put you in the mind of Patrick Stewart from Star Trek The Next Generation. I thought I was in love with him! I have always appreciated a man's mind.

butalbee

I've always aprreciated a man's body. Really look forward to seeing a nice ass in Levi's, broad shoulders, bulging biceps, and....

But you can't build a relationship on looks. There's got to be more, what a person is on the inside is what makes or breaks a relationship. The nice ass is just eye candy.

jesussaves--I used to have a crush on my principal in HS, looked for trouble to get into so I could get talked to by him, did a lot of detention.

cellomould

I'm giggling with you, BlueFire!
But boo to boring and banal hubbies!!!!!

cellomould

"In other words, your God is the warden of a prison where the only prisoner is your God." Jose Saramago, The Gospel According to Jesus Christ

Seeker

But you can't build a relationship on looks. There's got to be more, what a person is on the inside is what makes or breaks a relationship. The nice ass is just eye candy.

That's the spirit, butalbee. You're getting the idea. May you find your ideal, a guy with a great inner self...and a nice ass too.

Solace

I have been offline for a few days but I just wanted to add this.
The topic of "not wanting a nice guy" was brought up.
That is so true for most girls. My own sister recently had a baby with a guy who treats her awful. He even has a first degree sex offence record with a minor. She had a "nice guy" trying to get her attention the entire time. She even called him when the other treated her badly, he was always there for her but she chose the jerk. She now spends most of her evenings alone, untill he feels like strolling in at odd hours of the morning.
I totally wanted a nice guy because I watched my mother enter into an abusive relationship with a man. I swore to myself that I would never be in a relationship like that. I met my husband at a party. He was cute but I guess others didnt feel that he was the most "popular" guy around. One thing I noticed was, he was the only guy there that wasnt drinking. I do drink occasionally, so it wasnt just that but I was very drawn to him. He just seemed more honest, and not afraid to be different. Most of the other girls were falling all over the partying guys who had the nicest cars etc. Some of the girls even laughed at me, making comments like why would I choose him etc. I couldnt believe it because neither they or I were drop dead gorgeous.
Anyway, we have been married for 13 years. He is the greatest person, husband, friend and father to our children. I can honestly say that I wouldnt care if he gained weight or went totally bald, I would still love him.
I run into some of those girls now, from time to time and its ironic, most of them are either alone raising their children fighting for child support or unhappily married. One girl who actually dated my husband and dumped him for a "cool" guy, ended up with someone who is now in prison for sexually assulting her and her cousin at the same time. I dont think she will be choosing that kind of man again, regardless of how "popular" he is.
I guess at first, what attracts you to someone might be their outer appearance but after you become attracted to them as a person, it goes beyond that. That could be why we see couples that seem mismatched, ones very attractive and the other isnt. Some people age well and others dont but their partner doesnt notice because they already love them as a person. Ya' know, like loving your children, unconditionally.

Does Looks Really Matter?

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