Welcome!! I'll echo others in their advise to take things slow and make well thought out decisions. Ah, if I had only done what you're doing when I was 20..... this is a great place to vent and to learn. Look foward to hearing your contributions.
i am a regular pioneer in my cong reading crisis of conscience.here goes...
by MsGrowingGirl20 206 Replies latest jw friends
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dyakoub
Hi MsGrowingGirl, Welcome to the forum. YOu have a private message. (click on the blue enveloe on the top right).
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slimboyfat
Congratulations MsGrowingGirl - reading Crisis of Conscience for the first time is exciting indeed. I remember the exhilarating mixture of discovery, disbelief, fear, excitement, realisation, disappointment, paranoia, and joy. It was a bit like a first sexual experience.
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wannabefree
Welcome! You are in for a ride, your world will turn upside down at times ... you have found a good place here where most have been through many things you will face ... best wishes to you.
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DonutZ!
Well its a good thing you're reading this book, I just wish I could read it......grrrr
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slimboyfat
Why can't you read it?
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flipper
MS.GROWING GIRL- Welcome to the board ! nice to have you here. Enjoy reading the " Crisis " book - cautiously though if you have JW relatives or close friends you still associate with. Don't tell them you are reading it as they will try to talk you out of it because it tells the truth and exposes the inner workings of what REALLY happens behind the scenes at WT headquarters. If you have any other questions please feel free to ask anybody here. It's how we learn and gain clear, critical thinking ability. Remember, we are here for you, O.k. ? You have a support system here to fall back on if your fellow JW's give you any hassles
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steve2
Hi MsGrowing Girl. Your account has touched a genuinely meaningful nerve with so many of us. I'm from New Zealand and when I first developed some doubts about the organization, the local elders implied it was because I was unwell and was looking for a way out. I believed them and so suppressed my doubts. Then I read about Ray Franz's experience in Time magazine and almost died with a giddy mixture of shock, fear, excitement and relief.
Here was a man who had been at the helm of the organization, he was not unwell but a well regarded and respected man. I contacted Ray and was in correspondence with him for a number of years. When Crisis of Conscience was published, I soaked it up and recognized that so many of my own doubts were being expressed by Ray.
You may look over your shoulder from time to time, MsGrowing Girl. But you'll never look back or be the same. Welcome to a simply amazing and freeing journey. It will be scary at times and you'll certianly have your moments when you just need to chill out and slow down - but genuine freedom is never ever easily won, but once attained, you'll never let yourself give it up ever again for any human organization!
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dozy
Welcome. Enjoy the book - it is a real eye-opener. For me , even though I already had severe doubts and knew that the society didn't have the truth , Franz's books basically tied up all the loose ends - a bit like an Agatha Christie movie at the end when the murderer is revealed. It was the WTBTS crackdown on higher education , especially the threat to remove any elders who allowed their children to go to college that really was the last straw for me as well.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/156044/1/Further-Education-WTS-ups-the-pressure
Take your time - chill- you have plenty of time - be very careful who you speak to and what you tell them. Assume people (elders / parents / siblings) will break confidences. Especially be very wary when 2 elders come knocking wanting "a chat" - their friendliness & apparent willingness to help can be beguiling. If I was to go through the process again , I would zip the lip & say nothing to anyone.
If you do decide to leave , have a plan. Especially at your age , you have so many more options than us older ones who had families & often responsibilities in the Org. If you don't want to be DFd have some sort of classic JW label that people can pin on you to explain you being "weak in the truth". eg going to Uni , being stumbled , depression , stress , busy with work etc. How about the "felt I was unable to live up to the standards of being a JW but I still believe it is the truth" line - seems to have worked well for a few young ones around here and even is regarded with some sympathy.