by independenthinker 73 Replies latest jw experiences
Hello, Independent Thinker!!
Welcome to the board!!
You've received a wealth of excellent advice already. If I understood your OP correctly, you are not in danger of being thrown out of your home if you should eventually choose to change your religion...
But you might find these threads interesting, at any rate...
http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/95116/1/A-Good-Escape-Plan
http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/watchtower/bible/193360/3/How-did-you-find-the-strength-to-leave
My advice to you would be to be careful of how and what you say about what you have discovered. You run the risk of losong your family if they decide to follow the letter of the law set up by the wt. I have seen it several times where a young person expresses doubts and they are bullied back into line by the fear of losong any financial support and more dangerous...Loss of communicationw ith their family.
We are all here to help with questions and support.
All the best to you my young friend.
WOW Welcome...I havent`waded through these posts answering your concerns,however if as you say you want honest answers to your questions you couldn`t have come to a better place.
smiddy
i said to my husband last night - honestly, its like finding out that the sky is actually green and the grass blue! WTF!! So I understand that feeling of being shattered... sucks to find out youve been brainwashes. I think if Id found out what I know now at 18, I wouldnt have coped very well at all. Lots of supportive people on this site, keep digging.
A very recent WT (the one on what is the right religion i think?) said that no one should feel guilty for fully investigating their religion.... and yet we are expected to have blind faith in the GB and FDS and not look at anything else outside of what they tell us!
The WT are very sneaky, although they say infant baptism is wrong and unscriptual, they make it OK for you to get baptised at 14 (I was much younger!) even though you're not mature enough to make the decision really - it even more of a commitment than getting married! Once baptised, you're subject to DF and shunning. No wonder so many are stuck in the religion. We just didnt question what our parents and the society taught us.
Nice that youve found someone to date, but take it SLOOOOW - i was sure Id met the love of my life at 17, then again at 19. Not saying you havent, but at your age the odds are against it.
Take care of yourself, and be careful who you talk to about your doubts.... until you're ready for the consequences.
And heres a big HUG ((((((())))))))) for you!
Love Notready
Welcome to the Board.
Bangalore
Welcome, Independant Thinker!
Tip: If you're using your PS3 to access the forum, you can also plug any cheap (5$) USB keyboard so it will be less painfull.
One option that hasn't been mentionned, but that you can also consider is requesting an annulment of your baptism. Since you got baptised at 14, only recently attained majority, and apparently didn't sign any paper since (pionner/ministerial servant papers), that could work, meaning you'd be considered as if you never got baptised and won't be shunned.
It's not necessarily something to do straight away, but once you've had time to do your research and ponder your options it could be an avenue to pursue.
Disappointing mum is tough. The thing is, if she can get along with your dad and doesn't need you, it's best you take your own course in life. Besides, if your getting married you'll be moving out, living your own life.
This is a tough situation but at the same time, your circumstances don't seem all that bad. I wish you the best and welcome to the forum, Independenthinker.
This one will be a little off beat re mother's and sons but way back when JW's were called Bible Students, A women raised her son's up as International Bible Students which later became JW's. In fact their home from 1896 to 1915 served as the local meeting hall. None of the 7 son's became JW's but apparently they always stayed close to their mother (the Father also left the religion).
Dwight D Eisenhower was one of her sons and he left the bible students to attend West Point, eventually became Supreme Allied Commander in Europe during WWII, a 5 star General and then the 34th President of the United States. His upbringing was a positive force in his life but he never returned to the religion.
His mom stayed a devout JW.
If you google 'was Eisenhower a JW' you can confirm this for yourself.
Also if you decide to get out you can do so without being DF or DA, follow the good advice on this forum, say nothing to anyone about your doubts (every hard to do) and just fade away. It's a small price to pay to keep your parents in your life.
independenthinker: i've not had privelages for the past 2 years ... they told me it was because i needed a haircut . . .
What a manipulative cult. You can't even wear your own hair the way you want.
I'm surprised they haven't said striped/paisley/solid color ties are a sign of "spiritual weakness".
Stupid cult!
I heartily concur with the advice of Norcal_Sun to read Hassan's books, especially the second one, Releasing the Bonds , in which he specifically addresses JWs.
In it you'll read about the power of getting the family that is OUT to gently reach out to the family member that is in.
Read it and then start getting in touch with your siblings and other family members that are ex- or neverbeen-JWs and develop a team approach to intervening on your mom's behalf.
Best wishes,
00DAD
