Need Some Tough Love & Help (page 3)

Simon Morley

fakesmile: I see. I did not get into any heated words - I just apologized and tried to keep the peace as I am sure as hell not going to any hotel tonight . I would not be bothered if she was doing it (I guess easy for me to say) - nor does it mean I love her any less

fakesmile

i am about to make sweet love myself. i dare you to tell me its wrong.

fakesmile

respect to your respect for the wife. but dammit. she cannot stop you from being human

l p

Simon,

Im not going to put up some advice saying ive got experience..Im very inexperienced when it comes to things like this. Im a female. My ex partner was a detective. the relationship was violent, he cheated on me multiple times, i got an STI from him...and he use to look at porn.....it was something that was a contributing factor that helped destroy me as a WOMAN!! if you get my drift...

it can do damage to a woman....ive had a heap of domestic violence and sexual assault counselling and it IS a form of abuse.....

fakesmile you are completely wrong and out of line to say that his wife is 'not doing her job'

sexual encounters within a relationship must be agreed upon and consentual.....

however - now that i have said this...try not to let the disappointment destroy you over it....treat it like you've gone to the doctor and he has told you you have an illness...after the initial shock and grief.....you move into the stage where you try to manage your illness or get it treated..... im NOT saying this is an illness...just an example....

my only bit of advice is to go and seek some counselling....in regards the relationship.....earning back trust...dealing with your wifes issues that she feels betrayed...you should seek this on your own...and also as couple counselling...this will hopefull show your wife that you are serious about listening to her, acknowledging how you have hurt her, and apologising and how you really want to earn her trust cos you love her BLAH BLAH BLAH....you get my drift.....

and i cant comment on the porn bit bec i know not much about it...just that there are varying degrees of porn....

so im sorry i cant help you in anyother way - but the advice i have given i know is the best bit of advice you can recieve...

LP

Simon Morley

I am glad you all have a good perspective. I am going to just see if the dust settles. At least I have admitted to it - I feel better from that, just not that my wife is so terribly hurt buy it all.

Simon Morley

Thanks lp: that was a huge help. It was not violent, rape, or kiddie porn BTW: You advice is appreciated especially coming from a womans perspective.

fakesmile

with respect i p. i will not make joke about this subject. if she want to stop the whackkin, she will take matters into her own hands.... no pun.

Simon Morley

fakesmile: I know where you are coming from - she has not done nything wrong in tha score - when we have intimacy it is very close and loving. I just can't come to terms with the digust she feels. Maybe I just see what tomorrow brings.

Simon Morley

Thanks for the input - I am off to bed (basement couch) as I have work in the morning.

fakesmile

simon. you are not less of a man for looking at porn. dont negate yourself.

Need Some Tough Love & Help

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