by JeffT 52 Replies latest jw friends
Hey Bro,
if you have the time, energy and drive - do what makes you feel good. Who knows you may strike a cord and help others -
There were many posts very instrumental to my benefit and welfare - a blog,,,dont really have the time or energy to read those,
heck it's hard enough to keep up with all the good stuff on here!
Stay strong and be happy and prosper!
Who likes Joan Rivers?
Eleven years and counting, I have been on here. Since I still have a household that are zealous dubs , this place is release for my frustration, it is therapy. I feel a monster debt of gratitude to Simon and Anghared for starting and maintaining the board. When I joined, it was wonderful to find that there were other people who felt the same way that I did. - and this place is fun
Why not leave it and move on? Because the WTS subject is in my home all the time, I cannot forget it. Also, although I am not an insightful writer , you never know but that something I say or share could help somebody . That would be great. And of course if we all sat back & did not contribute the board would not thrive....
Keep on posting people!!
I'm often surrounded by the JW mentality. I'm 3rd gen., even now, nearly 10 years later, still wobbling on the tightrope between two worlds, juggling other people's sensitivities (athough I'm further away from the JW end than I've ever been and gradually edging more distant). This place helps keep me sane and restores some inner equilibrium, perspective. People's stories, strategies and coping mechanisms help me a lot and I try to be of help to others too where I can - especially if they are just learning TTATT. I also like to read the scoop from Watchtower-land that I otherwise wouldn't get to know!
I've been on this board since 2002 (i used a different forum handle from my current one from 2002 thru 2008).
I've been out of the JWism longer than I was in it, have no family in it (never did), and in my daily life I really don't think about JWs or JWism at all. It's just a weird chapter from my past that seems almost surreal to me now, and I'm fortunate in that I currently have zero personal connections to it. I take a good bit of delight knowing that those hateful, boundary-challenged gossip-hounds (of course not all JWs fit that description, some of them were among the nicest people I've ever known) know NOTHING about my current life other than that I'm still around; I survived.
But, I do remember how incredibly traumatic the Spring of 2002 was for me when I learned TTATT, and I got SO much out of this db back then. It really was a life-saver for me. For much of my time with the JWs I was in the inactive category, which caused me to experience constant guilt and fear. In many ways I came to HATE JWism, but my critical thinking faculties were so nonexistent and I was so propagandized by it all that of course I always felt that I was the problem. My own psychology was of the perfect type that high-control groups are able to exploit, and exploit they did. At the time I found this board, I was really coming apart.
So I feel that this board's existence is so important for people that are going through that same trauma that I did, hence my continued participation. The WT organization does a real number on people, and so I feel that boards such as this one need to not just exist, but to thrive, and so I'm glad to contribute in some small way.
NANCY CREW: This is a unique place where a person can talk to others who have had the same experience because people who have not been there really don't understand.
I'm only here for about 2 years. I think Nancy Drew said it quite plainly. Unless someone has been there, they simply CANNOT get it. You must have walked in the same path to understand the emotions and feelings and anxieties that a person experiences when the learn TTATT. It dashes to pieces everything their life has been built upon. It changes everything! Your (at least my) emotions bounce all over the board like the ball in a pinball machine. Anger. Regret. Guilt. Sadness. Apathy. It has been compared by others here to losing someone to death.
If you can't share these things with the people here who do understand, then Where else could you go?
Doc
1st, this forum helped me so much. I was the one who kept my "worldly" family at an arm's length, causing them so much pain. My parents died before I could tell them that I was leaving the cult.To be able to post here was therapy for me.I wasted more than thirty years of my life. That is not something easy to live with.
2nd-I try to welcome new posters who may feel as I did...devastated to find out the real truth. They need encouragement to move on, and I try to help with that.
Here is my comparison. Though not as physically deadly as the Holocost, the trama is exactly the same. The Jewish population volentarility gave up their guns and any means to defend themselves, trusting the Nazis could never, ever think of extermination. Even when most heard of what was really going on the vast majority would not believe it..... it was beyond comprehension. The same is true with the Printing Company. They love bomb you, or you grow up in the mindset dependent on those around you. How can anyone comprehend a parent or child turning on them? Is it not the same? It is the total disbelief that a human being can actually act like that. It has been since 1986 when I left in the middle of the witch hunts of that time; the utter emotional devastation is not meant to go away. The pain it cost us was as hard of a reality check as the Holocost. But our pain taught us that the Printing Company is EVIL. Sometimes I STILL, after all these years, cannot get my arms around it, that anyone could be that evil. I am afraid, truly afraid, if I do not keep remembering/recalling what happened, it will happen again. I have come to accept that my ability to trust anyone will never develop. I didn't lose it, I never developed the ability in the first place as a born in.
So yes I "cling" to those like those here on this board to confirm over and over again what I went though. I never want to forget, and as long as there is breath in me, I will work to keep remembering. I have to... lest it happens again. This is the cross I carry.
For me, I can't stand how the WTS changes their teachings and the new ones seem to never know what was taught as "truth" before. The more of us that post online and do blogs and anything else that exposes the WTS for what it truly is can only be a positive thing.
By posting here I can keep current with what my wife and family are hearing at the meetings and share my knowledge of growing up as a witness and serving in various positions with others.
It feels good to use the useless witness knowledge I have to help others; and to be a small part of dismanting the WTS.
-
Why I am still so drawn to this subject?
Beyond curiosity I’m not really drawn to the subject with the exception of folks asking questions of things Watchtower (the religion) or of Jehovah’s Witnesses (the people).
My reason for presenting information on Watchtower and Jehovah’s Witnesses is to pass along things I’ve learned or experienced for sake of helping others. I enjoy helping others. The reward is knowing I’ve provided someone somewhere with a piece of education they may not have otherwise experienced, and occasionally I actually get an at-a-boy from a person who took time to express thanks.
As Blondie said before me, no one can change the past; it’s part of our lives. We might as well use it, and sharing our knowledge and experience is as good a way of using it as I can think of.
I started a blog a few years ago. It’s at: http://marvinshilmer.blogspot.com
Marvin Shilmer
Cheaper than therapy
