A question for those that have been around this board for a long time

by JeffT 52 Replies latest jw friends

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  jws

  It's been over 20 years since I left and according to my profile, I've been on this board for the last 10 of those years.

  I kept coming back here because my father and sisters are both still JWs. I'd talk to my father every weekend before he died. Part of me wanted to keep up with what was going on. Was there going to be something that jeopardized our relationship? Could I counteract it? I guess I've also been watching for the JW demise. Waiting for it all to crumble. Hoping for eventual validation from my JW family that yes, I was right to leave, instead of being perceived as a "poor lost sheep". Along with a slight bit of scorn from brother-in-laws.

  After my father passed away, and since I have a lot less contact with my sisters, I don't come here as much, I don't feel the draw. But it comes and goes. My sisters are hardly a part of my life. They're not like a dad. I love them, but was never as close to them as they were married off when I was little. They don't call. So there's not a lot of risk. One day they will pass on too and I may cease to have any interest in JW things whatsoever.

  For now, interest in things JW comes and goes. Sometimes I'll see this site in my bookmarks and figure, let's go see what's going on in JW world or ex-JW world as the case may be. And I'll get curious about some stories. But I'm getting less and less interested. If anything, it's the social aspect sometimes, not the JW part.

  I would love to help people leave if I can or at least help them through things. In some cases, I think my posts do help. As far as making the case against JWs, there is so much out there, is there anything not covered already? Does repitition and duplication make the case more strongly? Maybe.
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  steve2

  * SAFE EXPOSURE TO DIFFICULT, IF NOT TRAUMATIZING, EXPERIENCES CAN BE THERAPEUTIC AND EVEN EMPOWERING. JW NET PROVIDES A VENUE FOR ACHIEVING THOSE NECESSARY GOALS.

  A common reaction to difficult and traumatic memories is to avoid facing them (because of the pain). So it is that unknown numbers of those who have been hurt by the organization struggle alone and continue to suffer because they remain in some way still under the spell of the Governing Body in Brooklyn.

  Forums such as JW net provide safe, unpressured and, if necessary, anonymous venues for "working through" issues that only others who have been through similar experiences understand and can help with.

  In the past, former JWs virtually "suffered" alone with no measurable sense that there was a worldwide network subpopulation of others who have been through similar experiences. Isolated, we often needlessly felt we had limited options. In the 1980s, for example, I genuinely believed the "only' solution was to find an alternative religion. I had a miserable round of 'out of the frying pan and into the fire experiences'. I've grown a lot since then.

  How absolutely fantastic to see through JW net that those who have left the organization - or have been connected to it in some way - lead fulfilling and normal lives.

  How fantastic to realize that an organization that peddles falsehood loses its awful power over people once they open their eyes and see the Governing Body Emperor has no clothes on.
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  Found Sheep

  I like this place i take vacations from it from time to time.
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  franticfran

  As you can all see I am very new,but can I say I am so so glad your all there for us unsteady frightenend ones,its terryfying thinking your the odd one out and you dont fit anywhere and you never will again,what a real comfort it has been for me these last few weeks,you wouldnt believe it,my shattered confidence is slowly returning and allready I have made a facebook friend from this forum. I wish I had "met" you all four years ago when I was at my lowest ebb. Your lovely people,thank you.
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  problemaddict

  I'm new, but one day I will not be. Community needs no explanation. It just exists. I am thankful there is a place like this because it is an outlet for many, an educational source for many, and it CONSTANTLY is proving the society wrong by showing that "apostates" are not mentally diseased, but unselfish with their time, research, and caring for others.
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  LongHairGal

  JeffT:

  I suspect that you have a bit of anger, as I do.

  I analyzed the reason I have residual anger even after being a twelve year fader is because there is no "closure" in the sense that there are people there who needed to be told off for the things they said and did. Some of them have passed away and I will never get the chance to tell them off.

  So, there is this sense of justice denied if you want to call it that. Many people were damaged by this religion and there is no real justice for them, if it can even be gotten.

  The only thing left for them to do is talk about their traumatic experience.

  Some people are able to walk and forget it all. I have "walked" and moved on for the most part but there is that part of me that wants to see certain parties get their comeuppance!
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  Aunt Fancy

  I have been on for less than a year but I have found this to be a very comforting place to be. I am thankful to all of you who have provided wonderful and encouraging info. Some need to continue to encourage others and then there are those that don't need to continue reading and contributing. It is a very personal journey and we each handle it in different ways. I too like to keep informed on what is new in JW land. We still have some more people we are trying to help out so it is good to keep up to date. I admire all of you that have put so much time and energy into public forums, blogs and other writings in order to inform us of what the TTATT really is!
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  FlyingHighNow

  I meet strangers all the time in my job. Never do I enjoy an instant rapport of the kind we former jw's share. We were part of this huge thing, a worldwide brother/sisterhood. We take that with us when we go. The enlightened state of mind we find ourselves in, provides a stronger familial bond than we ever had while still in.

  If you feel a stirring in the depths of your soul to offer insight to witnesses inside and out of the organization, you have to answer it.
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  smiddy

  I`ve been on this site over 5 years now ,tough I left the religion in the early 90`s .After 33 yrs in the borg I find this site therapeutic and educational and sometimes downright hilarious ,but my wife just doesnt see the point nor do other members of my family who left .

  smiddy
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  Black Sheep

  Scuse my paste from our very own BluesBrother but, "Since I still have a household that are zealous dubs , this place is release for my frustration, it is therapy. I feel a monster debt of gratitude to Simon and Anghared for starting and maintaining the board. When I joined, it was wonderful to find that there were other people who felt the same way that I did. - and this place is fun" pretty much sums it up for me too, and I would love to have a beer with him sometime.