Pirates first instinct when ressurected is chop off the heads of the men...rape the women...and steal everything...good luck with that first bible study.
Shiver Me Timbers I Gots a Bible Study Matey!
by RayPublisher 100 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
-
-
Splash
Why have they hidden the main pirates cutlass?
His hand is on the handle but then it becomes see-through like glass, making it hard to see.
Why?
Splash
-
cedars
JakeM2012
How do you copy the picture of the pirates off the magazine?
If you download the PDF and open it in Adobe Reader, there should be a "snapshot" tool (looks like a camera) with which you can copy and paste any images or text from the magazines.
Cedars, how do you add text to the white board?
That's the magic of photoshop!
Cedars
-
soontobe
What about petting pirate lions in Paradise? How awesome would that be?
-
designs
The entertainment value- priceless
-
RayPublisher
A JW APOLOGIST REPLIES TO ALL YOUR SNIDE COMMENTS:
Well this is an article for children.
You don't believe in the resurrection?
The faithful slave knows what it's doing!
Umm, okay this one is pretty lame...
-
wasblind
Daddy , Daddy !!!!! I wanna have a bible study wit' Abraham Lincoln !!!!!!!
and tell him the slaves should wait on Jehovah !!!!!!!
.
-
dozy
Setting aside everything else from this ridiculous article , it also presupposes that a 8 year old kid living now would be approx of that age when the pirate is resurrected.
But that isn't what the WTBTS teach. First of all they teach that the great tribulation precedes Armageddon , which presumably takes several years. Then the righteous ones are resurrected first ( including the faithful men of old - David , Abraham etc - presumably not to stay in Beth Sarim on this occasion ). Finally the "wicked" ( presumably including pirates ) are resurrected. All this would take time - many years.
In fact , the Insight book assumes that at least 100 years would be spent " subduing " the earth before any of the bad guys are resurrected. This makes our 8 year old kid at least 108 years old by the time he sits down with Blackbeard.
it-2p.793Resurrection
Then if, after allowing, say, 100 years spent in their training and in ‘subduing’ a portion of the earth (Ge 1:28), God purposes to bring back three percent of this number, this would mean that each newly arrived person would be looked after by 33 trained ones. Since a yearly increase of three percent, compounded, doubles the number about every 24 years, the entire 20 billion (20,000,000,000) could be resurrected before 300 years of Christ’s Thousand Year Reign had elapsed, giving ample time for training and judging the resurrected ones without disrupting harmony and order on earth.
-
slimboyfat
LOL this is hilarious!
-
slimboyfat
Did they force the pirate to shave his beard before he got a Bible Study? Or will people be resurrected with their beards already shaved off? Who knew that resurrection would be such a, um, depilatory process?
