I wanted to punch this elder so bad! (page 2)

NeonMadman

Reminds me of the time an elder told me that I shouldn't keep an open mind, because "an open mind is like an open sewer; you get all kinds of garbage in there."

baltar447

No need to think at all!!! Never ceases to amaze me how ridiculous it all is...

You handled yourself well. He is simply a smug jerk without much thinking ability (look at his responses), so having someone else do the thinking for him is right up his alley. I would screen my calls for a few weeks, and avoid the meetings for as long as possible. Take comfort in knowing you are the better man here. He is just not worth your wasting any emotions on.

Cold Steel

Although I don't buy his divine calling, nor the legitimacy of the Jehovah's Witness organization, you should understand that he believes this is his purview...namely your spiritual welfare. I wasn't there, but if he was butting in, he should have backed off instead of questioning your motives. Normally if a friend tells you he or she doesn't want to talk about something, it's best to leave the door open but to back off as a matter of respect.

JWs see themselves as the only recognized church of God on Earth. But the New Testament instructs: "I exhort the elders who are among you, I being also an elder and a witness of the sufferings of Christ, and also a partaker of the glory that shall be revealed. Feed the flock of God among you, taking the oversight, not by compulsion, but willingly; nor for base gain, but readily; nor as lording it over those allotted to you by God, but becoming examples to the flock. And when the Chief Shepherd shall appear, you shall receive a never-fading crown of glory." (1 Peter 5:1-4)

And Paul writes: "Yield to those leading you, and be submissive, for they watch for your souls, as those who must give account, that they may do it with joy and not with grief; for that is unprofitable for you." (Hebrews 13:17)

Your elder seems to be trying to exercise his authority at the expense of your personal life. As a feeder of the flock he feels he can do this, while you, as a doubter, see him as a prying busybody. Try to understand his point of view and if you don't believe his calling is of God, you probably won't be comfortable in the church, where his authority is generally accepted.

dazed but not confused

Wow. Great restraint.

Why are most elders such assholes? Appointed by Holy Spirit my ass.

I think there are 2 types of elders: Those who think they can make a difference and truly care about the people and show genuine love, and those who are there because of the control and power and influence over others. That asshole seems to be the latter. And both are truly lost. Good luck with your sure to come lynching…

steve2

Hey there Oneday, full credit to you for controlling your urge to punch this man; it would have been devastating for both you and him if you had punched him. Violence always gives the "other" side the moral and "righteous" edge over you and it would have fed big time into his "Ah-ha! Gotcha" mentality.

I acknowledge that he persisted way beyond what any sensible and caring person would have. How dare he say that your personal business is his. The utter arrogance. Yet, at another level, I really think he was "simply" - and yes, mindlessly - operating in organizational "elder-mode".

Sooooo, you need to be prepared. if you go to meetings, my view is you gotta play by their rules. If they approach you, don't feel compelled to confess under pressure, but also don't hand them the moral victory by losing your control. If they approach you on your own home territory, however, the situation's a bit different. Within reason, you have greater control over how you want them to behave. If they do not observe your rules, you order them off your property.

Again, Oneday, full credit for controlling your anger. It shows you can do it. It's a credit to you. But wise up, friend, it is now likely they will be on your case. Be mad at them for sure, but for goodness sake, don't play into their hands. While your anger is justified, the urges that go with that anger are not.

Glander

he doesn't need any punch, he's full of kool aid.

Unicorns

Hahahaha that is awesome! Go you! I would have loved to see that moron elder's face after you delivered that scathing burn.

I'm sure that's why many people join the JW's - they don't want to have to think for themselves, and they just want to do what they're told. Being in control of one's life and thinking critically - too hard, too scary.

The elder was actually right about one thing though. Satan is a representation of independent thought and free will. But he's definitely wrong about independent thought being an evil thing. Critical thinking is what allows us to judge right from wrong. Don't forget that some of the great atrocities in the world were done because people were simply doing what they were told.

Billy the Ex-Bethelite

That elder is an idiot. You handled it as well as could reasonably be expected with such an asshole.

Just for kicks, when he asked about what problem was bothering me, I might have said, "I've got a burning and itching hemorrhoid. Brother Elder, can you kiss it and make it better?"

As far as his remark about "don't think, just obey," I might have shot back with, "do you have a scripture for that? Because from what I've read, the Bible talks about using our powers of reasoning, examining whether something is true, and whether we are being confronted with a wolf in sheep's clothing. The vast majority of the Jews in Jesus day were mindlessly obedient to the Pharisees and other leaders, how did that work out for them? Do you really want to go on the record as saying 'don't think'?"

jookbeard

you gave the jumped up ass far too much time, should have walked straight past him and blanked him, make sure you do the same next time as well, you dont need non people like this giving you grief

I wanted to punch this elder so bad!