Q UESTIONS FROM READERS
Would it be appropriate for Christian parents to
sit with a disfellowshipped child at congregation
meetings?
There is no reason to be unduly concerned
about the seating location of a
disfellowshipped person in the Kingdom
Hall. This magazine has made every effort
to encourage Christian parents to
provide spiritual help to their disfellowshipped
child who is still living at home
if it seems fitting to do so. As indicated
on pages 19 and 20 of the November 15,
1988, issue of The Watchtower, parents
may even study the Bible with a disfellowshipped
minor who continues to live with them.
It is hoped that the child will thus receive
the encouragement necessary to correct his course.*
*Although this article refers to the disfellowshipped
When it comes to Kingdom Hall seating
arrangements, it would seem reasonable
that a disfellowshipped minor could
also quietly sit with his parents. Since it
is not required that a disfellowshipped
person sit at the back of the hall, there
should be no objection if a disfellowshipped
child sits next to his parents, wherever
they are sitting. As the parents
care for their child spiritually, they certainly
would want to make sure that he
is getting the most from the meetings.
Having the child sit with them rather
than leaving the young person unattended
elsewhere may be helpful in this regard.
What, though, if a disfellowshipped
child no longer lives with his parents?
Would this circumstance make a difference?
In the past, this magazine has
clearly stated the proper attitude that a
Christian should strive to maintain when
it comes to association with a disfellowshipped
relative who is not living at home.* (* See The Watchtower,
September 15, 1981, pages 29 and 30.)
However, the situation in which
a disfellowshipped person sits quietly in
a seat next to his relatives for the duration
of a meeting is far different from
the situation in which the relatives needlessly
seek out his company to associate
with him. If the faithful members of the
family have the proper attitude toward
their disfellowshipped relative and they
are endeavoring to honor the Scriptural
counsel concerning association with
him, there would seem to be no reason
for concern.—1 Cor. 5:11, 13; 2 John 11.
Whether a disfellowshipped person
sits next to a relative or next to any other
member of the congregation should not
be a cause for concern as long as he behaves
properly. Restricting where a person
sits could give rise to various problems,
depending on the circumstances.
If all present, including faithful relatives,
are endeavoring to respect Bible principles
relating to disfellowshipping, and it
is not becoming a cause for stumbling to
the brothers, there is no need to make
an issue of the seating arrangements of
those attending Christian meetings.#
#This updates what was published in
The Watchtower of April 1, 1953, page 223.
http://www.jw.org/en/publications/magazines/
Pretty much what was true in my last congregation 12 years ago; minor df'd children sat with parents wherever they sat; the family was not required to all sit in the back bcause of the df'd minor child. A df'd 19 year old child living outside the home also sat with their parents, quietly.
I can remember the question of whether a "faithful" wife could ride in the same car and sit with their df'd spouse in years gone by.
*** w53 4/1 p. 223 Questions From Readers ***
In this section of the November 15, 1952, Watchtower it was stated: “The faithful marriage partner would not discuss religion with the apostate or disfellowshiped and would not accompany that one to his (or her) place of religious association and participate in the meetings with that one.” Does this mean that if the man of the house is disfellowshiped, but attends the meetings at the Kingdom Hall, the faithful members of the family may not ride with him in the family car when he drives there?—O. G., Kansas.
No, that is not the point The Watchtower was making. It said faithful members of the family “would not accompany that one to his (or her) place of religious association and participate in the meetings with that one”. Since the disfellowshiped one is no longer a participant in the meetings at the Kingdom Hall, and since it is no longer his rightful place of religious association, he having been disconnected from that association by disfellowshiping, and in attendance at Kingdom Hall now, not by invitation or welcome but by his unwanted intrusion, The Watchtower was not referring to his coming to Kingdom Hall meetings when it spoke of not accompanying him to his place of religious association. It meant that the faithful one would not accompany the disfellowshiped one to another religious group with which the disfellowshiped one might associate and in whose meetings he might participate. It is all right for the faithful members of the family to ride with the disfellowshiped one in a car bound for the Kingdom Hall, but upon arrival the faithful ones should not sit with or associate with the disfellowshiped one at the hall, but rejoin him only when departing for home.
*** w59 7/15 p. 448 Questions From Readers ***
If an individual is disfellowshiped, but continues in quiet attendance at the Kingdom Hall, is it proper for that one’s marriage mate to sit with such a one during the meetings?—J. F., Switzerland.
With a view to helping sincerely repentant ones to get back into proper relationship with Jehovah God and his organization, it has been the policy of the Society to permit disfellowshiped persons to be present at all meetings at the Kingdom Hall that are open to the general public. For married persons Jesus set out the proper viewpoint when he said: “Did you not read that he who created them at the beginning made them male and female and said: ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and his mother and will stick to his wife, and the two will be one flesh’? So that they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has yoked together let no man put apart.” (Matt. 19:4-6) This rule would seem to apply at the Kingdom Hall as well as elsewhere. In view of this it would seem to be improper to force a separation between a man and his wife even if one or the other is disfellowshiped. This is not having fellowship spiritually on the part of the faithful one with the disfellowshiped partner. However, it would be wrong for the individual who is in good standing to try to force the company of the disfellowshiped mate upon the other brothers and sisters in the congregation in the endeavor to have them recognize the disfellowshiped one and have communion with that one.
minor as a male, the points presented also
apply to a female.