Disfellowshipped but still forced to pay maintenance or alimony

by Markw1509 65 Replies latest watchtower scandals

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  Markw1509

  Can I ask for your opinion? I have been disfellowshipped and divorced for a few years. My ex-wife and my daughter have cut off all contact from me. They live 300 miles away from me, and I'm not allowed to know anything. They enforce the shunning rule to the letter.

  however, the courts told me to pay ex-wife maintenance or alimony.

  does anyone know if WT allows the ex-wife to still receive money from me, even though I should be completely shunned? Or do they pull the 'obey Ceasar's Law' dictate to appease their conscience of receiving money from a disfellowshipped person?

  For instance, I could be making my money from crime or gun-running or drugs or the like (I'm not, by the way!) but would my ex-wife still be able to accept money from me?

  Appears double standards to me...take his money but otherwise don't have anything to do with him. Any other experiences or comments?
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  fedup

  Religion and ex-wives can't stop you from seeing your daughter. I wouldn't give in to that at all. Make sure your rights as a dad are respected, use the courts to see her. Don't become a deadbeat dad, you will lose your daughter forever. Why would you not fight to see her?
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  St George of England

  They will take your money.

  For JW's it's "necessary family business".

  As fedup says, ensure you get your access to your daughter, she is as much yours as your wife's.

  Stop paying and they will soon contact you!

  George
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  bigmac

  Religion and ex-wives can't stop you from seeing your daughter.

  ha---tell that to all those who have had to give up the struggle. it happened to me--now its happenning to my d/f son. if a religious nutter ex wife wants you to lose your kid--she will.
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  bigmac

  Stop paying and they will soon contact you!

  George is right--its your only bargaining chip. but its hard if the ex plays the "starving kid " card.
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  slimboyfat

  Don't underestimate the ability of JWs to always interpret the rules in their own favour. I've seen in many times. They'll cut a disfellowshipped person dead right up until it benefits them to do otherwise, and still honesty believe they are the most righteous beings in God's creation.
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  Chaserious

  Is your daughter a minor or an adult? I'm not aware of any WT rule that says they can't take alimony from DF ex-husbands. They will take the money every time, probably reasoning that it's better that she has the money to use it for "kingdom interests."
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  Scully

  Money is really what JWs worship, despite any claims to the contrary.

  The Necessary Family Business™ clause proves it with utmost certainty. If your ex-wife felt so strongly that any influence of yours was so harmful to your child, she wouldn't accept the money, nor would the WTS encourage it. If they were compelled to endure financial hardship for the sake of The Truth™, then the WTS would likely have to set up a fund to assist single parents who divorced on grounds of Spiritual Endangerment™. Your money suits their agenda just fine.

  Would you have the right to require an accounting of how the money is spent? Do you get to claim alimony and child support as a tax deduction? I'd get it in writing from the court that the ex must supply you with receipts. You don't want one thin dime going in the Contribution Box™ - all of it must be used for essential expenses, such as clothing, food and shelter.

  Are the maintenance payments enough to allow her to not have a job and Pioneer™ instead? If that's the case, then I think a review and possibly a revision of the support order is a reasonable thing to request. Is she making substantial Contributions ™ to the WTS using your support payments to do so? Again a review is in order.

  If you do succeed in having the payments decreased, set aside the amount you've saved in a trust fund for your child's education. Tell the court that is your plan. You know the WTS would rather have that money for themselves, and you need to think of your child's long term benefit.
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  Honesty

  JW's have no problem receiving alimony, maitenance or child suppoort from a former JW spouse even if the spouse is considered one of those evil apostates.

  JW's have no problem defying court oreders and denying visitation by a former JW spouse especially if the former spouse has been labeled an evil apostate by the leadership.

  JW's don't believe in hell so they don't believe they will suffer for their behavior.

  That allows them to do whatever they please to former spouses.
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  Anony Mous

  Unless your child is old enough to decide for herself, she can't choose not to come with you for court ordered visitation.

  You still have to pay child support and alimony. If your ex has her own job you can fight alimony but not child support, they are typically not linked to your visitation rights.