Goodbye JWD/JWN (my last post) (page 15)

braincleaned

SBF is a very interesting character. I think I understand him. I also think going back may give him closure to his doubts about the WTS. Everyone has a path to walk.
I have a lot of respect for him following his heart. I think his mind will face some serious cognitive dissonance though... but this is needed for his journey.
At his age, I think I may have been in quite the same situation... I also went back with remorse after a first fade. It took me a while to be where I am now — and a harsh inner war.

I wish him the best. Give it a year and probably much less, and I believe he will be back here... home.

gingerbread

All the best SBF!

Perhaps "SBF" has been coerced into returning.

Perhaps he has been 'found out'.

Perhaps he's grown tired of arguing and being pulled into arguments on JWN.

Perhaps he's decided that he wants to become an 'ex' ex-Jehovah's Witness.

Perhaps he's realized that some ex-JW's never stop thinking like a Jehovah's Witness.

Perhaps his life has taken a dramatic turn - a birth, illness, new love or death.

ginger

braincleaned

I also think that as long as one believes in Jehovah as a real entity, it is hard to not need the support of a group who believes in him also.
I'm not saying that atheism is the only way to cut loose — but that was the way for me. Once I distrusted the source of belief, the WTS became moot for me.
Only later did I see the need to help others get out, whether they believed or not.

20yearfader

you can go back but you will never be happy,you know too much hell at the age of 7 i knew too much or rather had questions that they couldn't answer.Going back is like a person making the decision to switch off their brain in order to follow the herd again,return to that for me NEVER! but if it works for you then have fun

adamah

SBF's situation was/is probably a bit closer to many of yours than you're willing to admit, since there's ALWAYS some vulnerability to recidivism. It's easy to say, "how could someone return to the JWs?" since it seems foreign to YOU, but the fact is that the threat of social ostracism works for many.

Since he was mentally half-in/half-out ("lukewarm") and an agnostic who was married to a JW (if it hasn't changed since he wrote the post), he was at-risk. It's hard to break away from the Org when you're married to a JW who genuinely believes it IS the Truth, and I got the sense that he was honestly confused and searching for answers, and was aware of the relative nature of truth from philosphy (only to be made fun of and dismissed for his "navel-gazing" by concrete absolutist thinkers which are rampant IN the JWs, and hence over-represented in an ex-JW community). Fading is risky, and being in decision-making limbo is emotionally-draining and takes a toll.

So having recently been found out as an apostate posting on JWN (!), SBFfaced his 'moment of truth' and was forced to make a choice: are you in, or are you out?

At this, the most critical juncture in his life, he likely saw MANY examples of the same dogmatic-style thinking in ex-JWs as offered in the Borg, and went with the Devil he knew versus the one he didn't (I won't name names, but the guilty parties SHOULD be able to see who they are: there's been a few truly horrific examples of dogmatic thinkers defending their claims well beyond the point any rational person would just say, "I was wrong.... Thanks for pointing it out."). SBF went with the certainty of the social interactions he knew than the uncertainty AND perceived dogmatism of the outside World (it's a false equivalency, BTW).

SBF renounced what he FULLY understands and knows about JWs upon the altar of service to JWs, but the fact is MANY active JWs do the same exact thing, and are trapped by threat of divorce and shunning. Don't underestimate the power of social ostracism (and he always likely felt an outsider, AKA socially-ostracized, here).

Whomever forced him to write the statement (and likely approved the wording before clicking 'submit' button) should be ASHAMED OF THEMSELVES for being so selfish as to put their emotional needs and desires above TRUTHS: it's not about YOU, or even SBF, but about having the balls to see the World for what it IS, not going with a group of fellow beleivers who share the same fantasy of what you WANT it to be. Reality is what it is, and any beliefs that force one to deny what it more probable are delusions.

The simple fact is, the majority of people make decisions for many-more reasons than pure logic, alone (usually for pragmatic and emotional needs), and SBF likely caved in to pressure from the spouse, his only 'known' love.

Adam

PS In honor of SBF, let me freely admit that I could be wrong on all of this (even though I highly-doubt that I am).

Phizzy

SBF, if he is telling us the truth about his going back, will have is own very good reasons.

I am assuming here that in all the pages of this thread there is not a post where he goes "GOTCHA !!!" I have not got the time to read it all, THE BOSS (Mrs Phizzy) will be home soon, and want to know why I have been wasting time again LOL.

We will miss you SBF, and you are always welcome back here, anytime. A lot of us found some of your posts annoying, for a number of reasons, but they were never dull !

Good luck, and all the best my friend. If you ever want to talk you have my e-mail addy, or P.M me on here.

Honesty

Good luck, SBF!!!

Tell the false prophet Governing Body that I love them even though they hate me.

fakesmile

iss ok. anuda quaalude, he be back.

Gayle

Very sad for him. I hope he will come back, if this is truly from him. "Fitting in" somewhere, is more about "fitting' into your own heart and mind with personal honesty. There is such an unhappy sound of a 'coercion' and misery in his opening post.

Emery

SBF, I've always enjoyed your thoughts, I hope whatever decision you make that it remains on YOUR terms.

I'm actually going through a similar situation myself, returning and all. My wife's mother is old in age and our exit could possibly devastate her if we continue -- we do not want it to negativity affect her health. A good number of jws have continued reaching out to us and have remained in our lives throughout this process which has made it even more difficult. We know their friendship is conditional, we know the Watchtower is fraud, but longtime childhood friends are post-poning our exit. So, we have decided to go only on Sunday's and that's it. As an agnostic atheist I would not be able to bare anything more than that. It's remains on our terms and we will not sacrifice anything other than 1.5hr on Sunday mornings.

Goodbye JWD/JWN (my last post)

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