Why do some here have the courage to stand up and say "this is my last meeting" and others not? Any reasons for this?
In my case... where I didn't force a showdown... I already knew that you couldn't force a JW to see facts and logic and come to the realization that the WTS was just another (false) religion. They, just as we were, are indoctrinated. Their real personality is stifled in order to keep the JW personality in charge.
I had always had some doubts, but like most here, managed to keep them stuffed away, never to let them take root. But once a couple of doctrinal changes caused me to out and out question, all those doubts led to some hard research and soul searching. I realized it was bunk, and I tried to slyly introduce evidence for review, but it usually didn't take.
Oh, we had arguments, but by the time it got to that point, the eyes had glazed over, the ears had plugged up and the brain had disengaged, and the cult personality/defense took over. Aside from those moments of disagreement, disappointment, and full on delusion on the part of the JW, the marriage is a good one and is worth fighting for. For me personally, I didn't want the WTS to win her over. I wanted to sway her from them. Still working at it. I've made progress, but the war drags on...Memorial season is usually the toughest time of the year. That's when all our other JW family 'encourage' us to return.
Another thing I read over and over here on this site: When one mate realizes the lies of the WTS and seeks to find freedom from them, their JW mate reasons that by the one leaving the 'truth', it means their marriage is doomed, that they can't continue on without both serving Jehovah the WTS. My wife charged the same thing. I told her that I married her for her, not for our faith, our religion. And instead of just saying it, I had to, over time, and lots of it, show it to her. Just because I'm no longer a practicing JW doesn't mean I've cast her aside as well. I made it a point to keep her first in my life, over work, over other family, over everything else. That part is working. We are closer now than ever. The religion rarely comes up and over time she is now inactive, at least physically. Mentally she has yet to make the final break, but she is more critical in her thinking. She is more independant. She doesn't look to the WTS for solving problems, or choosing sides in social issues (she is in favor of gay marriage and legalizing weed, for instance). Her social life involves 'worldly' people - co-workers, neighbors, people she meets in social settings that have nothing to do with the JW religion. Except for a few sticking points that I haven't been able to break her from, she is not much different than all of us who have already broken free. Once she gets to the point of admitting she was in a cult, then she'll be truly free.