by Terry 43 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
1. They done me wrong
2. I'm depressed
3. I'm gonna act like an apostate (smoke, drink, drugs, sex, outrageous behavior)
4. Big search/Big decisions (Gee, what IS the truth?) (I found Jesus) (God sucks)
5. Fear (What if the JW's really DO have the truth?)
6. Grumbling (permanent bad mood gossip about how lousy JW doctrines are)
7. Activism (strategies for informing everybody of specific harm caused by the JW religion)
8.) Path to true knowledge of the soul and spiritual growth.
I had a different order of post JW behavior.
1. They done me & EVERYONE ELSE wrong.
2. Activism (strategies for informing EVERYBODY of specific harm caused by the JW religion)
3. I'm depressed (JWs who I know will not listen and now they avoid me)
4. I'm gonna act like an apostate (smoke, drink, drugs, sex, outrageous behavior). I skipped this one!
5. Big search/Big decisions (Gee, what IS the truth?)
5. Fear (What if the JW's really DO have the truth?). I skipped this one.
6. Grumbling (permanent bad mood gossip about how lousy JW doctrines are)
7. Strategic Activism (strategies for informing specific groups/iinterested people of specific harm caused by the JW religion)
*****
I'm on #7
I skipped the crazy sex n drugs stage and will grumble about what idiots they are but mostly I'm in activism in that I will tell people I meet what jws are really like. I did rebel a little by celebrating birthdays and Christmas and drinking a lot!!
Interestingly, for me an many others, leaving the cult had the same stages as bereavement or breakup:
Denial of ttatt
Bargaining (if only, maybe I can stay for social life)
Anger (at their crappy teachings n the wrong they've done you )
Grief (missing the good things about the jw life, friends who now shun you)
Depression (guilt over being silly enough to join, the realisation of how much of your life you can't get back, feeling futile over loved ones still trapped)
Acceptance of the past
Moving on from it and getting on with life: rebuilding.
There's also the aspect of having to renegotiate your beliefs, beliefs you've had no say in formulating that you now have to sit down and work out for yourself, such as, what do I think about homosexuality? What do I think about Harry potter?
My stages were more like:
1. wait, this is bullcrap
2. i'm out
3. yay i can play games/watch movies with magic in now without feeling guilty and weekends are fun again
4. join this forum
5. rant about religious stuff
still on step 5
8. Wow this is an interesting planet, what do they do for fun around here?
I am at the depressed stage and also fear. But it's more fear of the future rather than what if they were right. I know WT are wrong. I am quite scared about how to rebuild my life. I have a disability and had a messy divorce so life is very scary right now.
Kate xx
I don't know?? I'm done with the anger. I have accepted the fact that I don't believe Jwism. I am done with Xianity. If an all-powerful, all loving creator can't show himself to me in some tangible way, or at least jot down some real-time information that is easily understood by ALL HUMANITY, then why should I worry about whether or not I am worshipping in an approved manner??? Why stress out about it?
You would think that if the Bible was inspired of GOD, then it would be a unifying force among humans. The fact is that even religions that claim to be "THE CHANNEL" are hypocritical to the highest degree. They are a devisive force on this Earth. I will actively fight against them when I can. Any GOD that approves of hypocritical behavior is not a being that I can respect, or worship. If this being wants to kill me, I can't do anything about it. If this being demands that I support lies, then I would rather be dead. Can you imagine an eternity under such rule?
As far as my lifestyle is concerned. It's no different now, except that I am less judgmental of others. I drink, but I don't over drink. Drugs?? What does that even mean? Everyone is on meds these days. If you mean illegal drugs, I don't use them. I don't need the crutch. I am past the point of harming myself to lash out at the WTBTS. Doing so is a waste of emotional and mental energy. That energy will be better used in my new job, where I can advance and do something to better myself and take care of my family.
I have reached a nexus where I can go in any number of directions. Those directions can now be taken using reason and logic and hard work, and personal responsibility. Life is more rewarding when you are not on auto-pilot. I was trained to coast through life, ignoring my gifts and dreams. They were given up as unimportant, ambitious, prideful even. I took the lazy way out for years. I always worked hard, but I held back. I turned down chances to succeed because of the "PANDA PARADISE" around the corner. A life where I would be on easy street, because I was special. All that energy wasted in a hamster wheel..
Well, now it's time to man-up, forget the past, stop throwing effort after foolishness. It's falls upon me to roll the hard six. No one else in my family knows TTATT. I have time to plan for the future, but I have to start NOW. I am 20 years behind schedule.
DD
I'm at TERRY's #4: Big search, big decisions. The search isn't about truth or god but How do I know what I know? and I'm enjoying my time now as a full-time student figuring at least a small part of the puzzle out. Big decision was to leave work to go to school FT, but no regrets there.
I also do quite a bit of #6, but mostly for my wife's benefit. Actually, with the new FDS teaching, kicking Russell to the curb and the ever-expanding definition of "this generation" my wife does plenty of #6 on her own.
