I've been DF'ed for 6 months and feel so dumb for how I used to think about people who got DF'ed when I was in good standing.
Looking Back, Are You Embarrassed By Your Attitudes, Speech, Actions as a JW?
by minimus 38 Replies latest jw friends
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konceptual99
Generally no. I do have some moments of ploppyness which I think were stupid and naive. I wish I showed more love to DF'ed ones. I also regret how I handled a situation regarding the a family who were leaving the "truth". Part of me also wishes I'd been less influenced by being the son of an elder and how things reflected on him. Having seen how he handled my siblings I think he would have expected me to get up to much more than I did. He said to one of my siblings once when they have been seen drinking underage that they were more stupid for getting caught than drinking in the pub!
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konceptual99
Just to add, that I think the chances of having been a dickhead increase if you were an elder, a "superfine" pioneer or had family inactive/disfellowshipped. Thankfully pretty much none of that has applied to me.
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monis1
i come from a family of people who question everything. They are fairly liberal. When i converted (or was converted - i was 11), my critical thinking all but stopped. the most positive way of facing my past is to realize that it made me who i am today. But, yes, i felt superior. The Jdubs really feed into one's ego. I am just glad that i am out now.
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blondie
My attitudes and actions I adjusted long before I physically left as a jw. It took some time to adjust my vocabulary, using God instead of "Jehovah" and "WT teachings" instead of "the truth" unless I was quoting jw literature.
As I have gone outside WTS teachings and read others comments and reasoned on information I found, I have made adjustments to my beliefs and keep making adjustments.
But embarrassed, no, if discovering the lies I had stayed in them and propagated them, embarrassed would not be the word to describe myself.
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4thgen
I recently read some of my journal entries from 10 years ago. I thought "was that really me?" Being 4th generation, it was all I knew. Seeking TRUTH was always important to me. I think those who should be embarrassed are those who knowingly teach lies. As a child should not be embarrassed for the stages of growth; We should not be either. If we chose to remain ignornant then THAT would be embarrassing!
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minimus
Village girl, summed it up.
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Blackbird Fly
I cringe when I think of how judgemental and snobby I was. Absolutely embarassing.
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minimus
When you believe that you are the only one to be saved by God, it's all understandable.