My Child Has Asked Me to Divorce Husband

HeyThere

i guess i am just venting. its a mess. I just dont even know where to start with this crap.

My child is fed up with all the jw stuff, and knows I dont want to be part of it.

my husband (who is dad) has been cranky. he has barely been talking to me or interacting with me since i vocalized my disbelief. our child can easily see how jerky he is being. he is cranky towards the child at times, as well. i am trying to give him time to absorb and adjust. tbh, last year i almost left him due to his behavior...no specifics buf was divorce worthy. i have fought toforgive to keep the family stable. but now my child says we should have left. and she tells me i shouldkick him out.

i am not going to jist do that, but he doesnt realize he is becoming extreme and pushing us all away. i told him after seeing his complete behavior change last year that we would stay. but he is obsessed with jw...and mad at me for having doubt. it has been several days now of his disdain.

i dont want to be a jw. i dont believe it. i am putting my own research to use and collecting data. then will walk. cant wait to see how he will be then amd i fear perhaps my child was right. maybe this just needs to end

snare&racket

Straight up.....

The Jehovah's Witnesses are a cult, it is a dangerous one too.

Ask anyome here if they would like their childhood again with the option of not being a JW and see how many people would give limbs and life years away to have their youth back.

Give your child a chance.... if it is not a healthy enviroment get them out. It is a lie and a misconception to 'stick it out for the kids.' Two happy seperated parents is 100x better than two unhappy parents. Trust me!

Snare x

P.s. I would never usually be so direct on such a personal and real issue. I guarantee everyone here pines for the years they lost to WT daily, you have the means to prevent that, it is so,so,so easy to leave....so, so easy. Just simply do it xxx It is the best gift you can give them.

Then get them working damn hard in school, find out what they want to be and help them get there! You won't regret it in 20 years time.

HeyThere

i know...i was trying to show my h, too. but he was raised "in the truth". he was inactive when we met and when we married...he just went back a year ago.

it was when i almost divorced him before that he started going again. i had discovered infidelity he completely changed...and then staryed going to meetings, got the whole familygoing. now he makes us do 3 family studies on top of the meetings and i am done. i feel like he is forcing us to do this necause he feels that is hpw he can be a better person. but he is pushing us away, still, after fighting to keep us together.

snare&racket

Tell him you no longer want to,be a JW.

If you think he will report you, don't tellhim why, you will be df as apostate.

If he won't budge and you no longer feel happy, then the desicion is obvious really.

We get one life.... every day that ticks by is gone....spend it wisely.

Spend it with the right person xxx

Black Sheep

Don't tell him anything that he doesn't, or shouldn't, already know from WT literature.

Be the one to ask the questions.

Insist that he answers them.

Don't answer his, he is usually just trying to change the subject.

Give him a guilt trip for every trick he tries to use to change the subject or weasel his way out of confronting the question.

Give him a guilt trip for any tactic he ties to use to bully you into excepting no answer, or a nonsense answer.

... and let your kid hear it all ...

nugget

Being a JW is his choice, he is trying to force you to make it your choice too. JWs with his mindset do not compromise and are not interested in an alternative point of view. His infidelity may make him feel that he has to work even harder to be in an approved state but if he hasn't confessed his sin to the elders he will know he cannot earn God's blessing under JW rules. The problem is he is making you do his pennance with him which is unfair and unreasonable.

If his behaviour is having a negative affect on you and your child then it may be time to change things. If he is not interested in what you want then separating from him and giving him an opportunity to realise that you are serious may be necessary.

It is incredibly difficult dealing with lapsed JWs who still believe because you are never free of the religion it is a shadow hanging over you. In such a relationship there is a danger you become marginalised and seen as a problem that will make it harder for him to progress in the organisation. He needs to decide what is important to him. You need to look after your child's interests sine he is being selfish and focusing on himself at the moment.

I wish it could be more positive, I really feel for you.

zebagain

jwfiles.com

HeyThere

snare...i am not a baptized jw...just an unbaptized pub. i have been actively studying with a sister and told her i no longer want to study with the books but want her to show me from the bible where things like 1914, disfellowshipping, etc. i can be marked but not df...and my life doesnt revolve around dubs so it wouldnt really matter to me...but i am trying to be strategic for my husband.

HeyThere

blacksheep...i just ordered a ton of older jw pubs...i am hoping i can find some stuff in there to show him....i am trying aome of the other tactics also. and my child is hearing allot of it. i have also been very open so they know they can talk to me...and they do. i know my child is not interested at all and doesnt believe.

HeyThere

nugget...you are right. it is depressing.

My Child Has Asked Me to Divorce Husband

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