I thought I'd hit it several times before...as I have been thru the divorce over the past couple of years...lost all my so-called friends...lost my belief in what I thought was the "truth"....AND NOW my own loving daughter, being the good little dub she is has told me she doesn't want me to walk her down the aisle at her wedding. She told me today at lunch. I almost threw up. I was literally sick to my stomach. She would not say why other than it was her decision. Do you realize that every father knows and looks forward (if he likes the boy) to the day he can do that. But you see it will be in front of about 200 dubs at a private residence and I think she's ashamed of me...the fact that I have wandered away from the flock.
I really really hate the bastards. I've been on Effexor and Paxil for the past two years...I gues they'll double the dose now. I swear if I were a tad younger I'd find another mate who wanted kids and start a new family..but this time I'd do it right. No religion. Family first..and I'd kill anyone coming to my door preaching their brand of hate. I've gotta sort this out. Thank you for letting me vent, I really don't know what to do. I'm tempted not to go but then everyone thinks I'm a real prick. Oh yeah, she does want me to video-tape it..you see I have professional equipment and she gets it all for free but I'm not good enough to walk beside her. God I cannot believe this is happening.
-BONEZZ