JGnat Says Hi (page 5)

What-A-Coincidence

WOW! Thanks for bringing up this thread!!! amazing story!

jgnat

I see someone followed my link. Your eyes must be sore from reading so much! This story is four years old, I haven't even checked it for perspective changes or anything.

One thing about my background, I am always tickled when I meet a scarred old warhorse who thinks they can take me on in a fight. My sweet and soft exterior fools. I've been through it ALL. Besides that, I am a determined strategist, usually two moves ahead of my opponent. It is so foolish to treat me as the enemy anyways, as I start out as everyone's biggest fan. I want people to WIN at life, and have fun doing it.

In a few months that old warhorse is flat on her back pleading, "Uncle!". But no matter how furious the battle, I'm quick to forgive. After all, that poor person has to live with themselves. Punishment enough.

slimboyfat

Great story, beautifully written.

Slim

arwen

Wow! What a life story. All I can say is that I am proud to to know you. I hope life is treating you good now. Your posts are always so interesting. You should write an update on your life now. Take care JGnat, and much love to you....Arwen

jgnat

I just finished re-reading this "book" My fingers itch to edit the whole thing, to straighten out the progression of events and add clarity. But that is for later. Right now you are due for an update, and I think that's what I'll do. In the past four years I have got myself educated about the witnesses, experimented endlessly on ways to coax my hubby away from their pervasive influence, come out of the closet a bit (Hi, I'm Janet, and this is my husband, Art), and delighted in the raising of my granddaughter. My daughter matures. My son struggles. My beloved stepmother, the one who mothered me, died of cancer last year. And my natural mom gained a new lease on life with a new kidney.

Determined

My neighbour and I were talking about my daughter the other day, and she paid, I think, a high compliment. "Your daughter is a very determined young lady." By a happy set of coincidences, my daughter was offered a very good price to purchase the townhome right next to mine. My daughter took the plunge after carefully weighting her options. She is a new home owner, right next door. She has quickly insinuated herself in to the community. She now serves on the condominium board with me.

The Light of My Eye

Though I had never expressed the desire, I have received a gift immeasurable. My beloved granddaughter, Naomi, lives right beside me. "Whatcha doin' Grandma?" is what I hear when I step out the door. She runs out the gate of her yard, trots invisibly behind the fence to mine, then an small hand appears over the gate at the latch. "Can I help?" My littlest fan tags along on my plant huntin' trips (I trade perennials with total strangers after scouting their yard), and my slug huntin' sagas ("There Grandma, on the fence, two more! Can I spray them? Ewwww.") Art has become a stepdad and a grandpa, teasing Naomi mercilessly, proud by proxy at who my daughter has become, and broodingly miserable over my son.

A Parent's Grief Goes On

My son's call last night confirmed my worst fear. He was talking paranoid talk, and I just knew. "Have you done drugs again?" He rambles about police and shame and evidence tossed. "Dear, I have to go. Call your sponsor." and I cut off the conversation. I cannot bear to hear him when he is like this. He joined Narcotics Anonymous a couple months ago, and this is the first time he's fallen since he joined. He's deeply ashamed, and I am heartbroken. On the positive side, I committed my son to a mental facility a year and a half ago. He stayed only a month, but this set in motion the grinding gears of bureaucracy, and finally my son has a nurse he sees weekly, a psychiatrist monthly, regular medication, a sheltered facility so he can stay warm and dry, and financial subsidy. This spring, on his own, he signed up for Narcotics Anonymous and found himself a part-time job. The work, roofing, makes him feel good. He tells me he doesn't feel like such a burden on society. He yearns for my love and care, and calls almost daily. Hubby and I have set limits. If he goes off on a rant, he can't be calling us day or night. He can call twice nightly at most, and never after seven. He follows our instructions carefully. My love is too important to him to risk being cut-off.

Me and the Witnesses

Since I joined the board four years ago, I've married my Witness. A lot of my experiences are documented in my Kingdom Hall Diaries, here. http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/104712/1.ashx

Art was terrified of introducing me to the hall. He had kept me a shameful secret for years. But now we were married, and I would not have it. I waited for months for him to confess, yet he kept holding back. I finally took matters in to my own hands. From my KH diary:

Well, I did it. I put on my best dress and my lipstick, fluffed my hair, crashed the hall, got through my first service, and met the elders. Before and after the service congregation members tried digging information out of me. I told the truth, but kept everything to a minimum. Name? "Janet." Where are you from? "Down the street." Do you want to start a study? "I will have to ask my husband first." Afterwards, Art called an emergency meeting with the elders. They were very diplomatic and nice. They were shocked as all get-out though, fumbling through the marriage verses. One odd statement from ElderThirdGeneration when he explained how everyone is treated the same in the congregation. "Look at Elder Harried here. He is a convert, whereas I am a third-generation witness, and we are all treated the same." I wondered privately, if they were the same, why he had to point out their relative standing generation-wise? I only contradicted the elders (and hubby) twice during the meeting. Right off when my honey called me his "fiancee". "No honey, we're married." And when one of the elders said "Married to unbelievers". I said, firmly but quietly, "I am not an unbeliever".They gave my honey the Secret to Family Happiness book. I told them I would be happy to study it with my husband. The Elder ThirdGeneration gave a last-ditch effort before I went out of the door, "Obviously you study the bible. What denomination are you from?"

For a long time the local witnesses braved the embarrassment of my existence, and did their best to welcome me in to the fold. As I proved resistant, they became more and more frantic, then cold. I can still dress the part, though, and the elders comment on my copious notes at the meetings. I can no longer bear the grinding same-ness of their message, even to copy down some of their most outrageous statements for you fine folks. Nowadays when I attend a meeting, I fill a blank notebook with my own thoughts. It is my way of retaining my individuality.

lisavegas420

I don't remember this the first time around. I read the entire thing...you are an amazing woman. I'm so glad you are here to share your experiences with us.

Thank you.

lisa

Big Tex

Janet I'm glad you're still around. You're a real inspiration on your roller coaster.

And I still don't have anything to add!

Quandry

We all have a story; we all went from wondering child to pragmatic adult. For some the journey is smooth, for others there are miriad kinks in the road, for others still, mountainous obstacles. I thank you for sharing yours. I rejoice with you that you have a loving husband, an independent daughter (but one that still wants to live next door) and a lovely grand daughter. I was saddened by the trials that have befallen your son, and encouraged by the fierce love of a mother.

Through all of your emotional ups and downs I am heartened that you still have a faith in Jesus and feel that he is your saviour. I am trying also to hold onto that, even though as a JW that is viewed as "causing divisions" through nothing other than opposing the harsh, unchristian way my daughter was treated I have trouble feeling that I have any standing with God.

You are a credit to womanhood and motherhood. I hope to learn more about you through your continued posting. Please continue with more chapters of your fascinating life.

anewme

I "riked it" too JGnat!
Thankyou for sharing your story!
I have a feeling there will be much more to add in the future!

Anewme

jgnat

Thank you, you fine folk, for travelling down memory lane with me today.

Please continue with more chapters of your fascinating life.

Well, to do that, I will have to keep living it. My month-long holiday ends in a few days, and I'm back to my intense workaday world, with you for breaks.

But I promise I will keep writing.

JGnat Says Hi

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