We've decided to have a baby! (Advice needed)

by StinkyPantz 53 Replies latest jw friends

DJ

Please share your pre-pregnancy and pregnancy tips that either made things smoother or things you wish you has done to make things easier.

I also want opinions on such things as epidurals, circumcision, nutrition, breast-feeding, money saving tips, etc.

I guess it is too soon for a congrats but making the decision is major! So congrats on that! You are very eager to learn so much, Stinky....I can feel your excitement>>>>>>>* * *
I have had only 2 children but I suppose I'll have to do for now, since you've only got Farkel and Larc...so far!! LOL Pre-prego......ok, take your vitamins and drink oj! Yams are said to be fertilizing....lol. They did get me my little boy! I think that sex is extremely important in the pre-prego stage too. You can get one of those basal thermometer thingies but generally we women know when we are ovulating, now don't we?
I see no problem with circumcision because it is for hygeine and it is the norm. Why make your child stand out because of his genitals. Nutrition during pregancy is important as well as your pregnancy vitamins. the doc will tell you what to get. There is a myth that women need to eat for two...silly and not true. You are eating for one, babies don't eat much do they? Just eat 3 sensible squares per day and your good to go. Remember your fruits and veggies of course and balance it with lean proteins...blah blah blah. You don't have to drink milk but take your calcium. Your bones need it now. Ahhh, epidurals......GET ONE. I didn't with my first baby, not becaue I didn't ask but because they said that the ER was full and they couldn't get me the right doc. (anestegiologist?) LOL, I cannot spell that today either. I never bought that story and my sister in law told me that she was told the same thing...sounds like a conspiracy to me. With my second baby, I asked well in advance for one and I was given 2 but they did not take. Most people don't have the same fortunate things happens to them as I do....so yours most likely will work! It is painful, I won't kid you Stinky but you will get through it. The breathing La Maze classes were helpful a teeny bit. It helped me keep my mind off of the pain because my hubby kept torturing me to breath correctly. i wanted to punch him...Like Farkel said.....IT is worth it. Find a hospital that has a good preemie unit because they are the most experienced.
Money saving tips........hahhahaha...your money saving days are about to end! LOL. Just clip coupons for diapers and stuff becaue it is expensive. Breast feeding is the way to go if you are healthy. It is the best thing for the baby, however I think formula is perfectly fine too. It is much easier but it is expensive. On the other hand it is always great to let dad feed the baby and he hasn't got the right kind of breasts so formula is good for that. I only breast fed for a short time and switched to formula. I used soy based ones instead of cow's milk.
I will hand you over to the next poster now....Good Luck and Congratulations to both you and your husband. Love, dj
StinkyPantz

SheilaM-
I'm reading "What to Expect When You're Expecting" right now, I heard it was very thorough.
I took a sort of poll at work and most of the girls said that uncircumsized penises looked gross. I don't want my son ostracized because of MY decision.
outoftheorg

Well I had what I thought was a clever response for you.
That damned pope the 13th stole it.
" You will learn what stinky pants are all about "
I will add one caution. Having a child at a time in ones life that is filled with stress= moving out of state-trying to finish an education- and possibly other things, can be a tough job.
However, it can and is done all the time.
Outoftheorg, of the had 9 children class. I recommend 1 to 4 and never more. I wouldn't take a million dollars for any one of them. But I wouldn't give a nickel for another one
SheilaM

Stinky: that is a very good book. If I had been where we are now I would choose to cercumsized but we had such horrible medical care there and I always put my child first. Anthony really has never had any problem,he has never been ostracized with anything about a child you have to teach them to be comfortable with WHO and WHAT they are and the rest is easy. he always knew why we chose what we did and I think that helped him as far as his peers (since he told me to leave "Mr. Winky" to he and his Dad (as far as conversation) I can not attest to any direct converations LOL. If I have another son I might choose to circumcize depending on that I would make sure they used some topical pain killer.
My dauughter had an epidural and I think she did much better after since she had never been sick hardly in her life. Pain to her was foreign. I am stubborn I did la maze and felt I had to "handle" birth a certain way, I wanted Thunder to be proud of me and I will say I did a good job but you know he would have been just as proud if I had been a wailing banshee. LOL
Money saving tips I forgot. Enjoy your baby, consignment groups are great. Babies don't know they don't have the latest greatest powered swing . Love the baby, take care of it comfort it and you can't spoil a baby. My daughter sleeps with my grandbaby held her constantly but Mak knows that her Mommy will care for her so if Mel is busy she doesn't scream and cry she may give a grunt like "hey, ya know I'm wet" Mak is 10 months she can say so many words.
LDH

Stinky,
Wasn't it just last week you were telling us how screwed you are financially over a car mishap? Now doesn't seem to be the time to bring a baby into this whole thing. (respectfully)
I could understand wanting to keep an unintentional pregnancy, but to intentionally bring a human into an already unstable situation? Doesn't seem like the best idea. A baby is so stressful. It can bring an already unbalanced situation into chaos, just due to the fact that *something* unexpected is bound to happen. That's the nature of nature.
You are so young. Put two years into turning your financial hellhole into a stable economic situation. Put aside $100 a month or so for unexpected baby expenses.
Just some friendly advice, not trying to tell you how to live your life.
Lisa
LDH

PS if you decide to ignore my words, then I have one more piece of advice.
Take Folic Acid starting today. Taking Folic Acid before and during the first trimester of pregancy reduces the risk of Open Neural Tube Defects (Spina Bifida) by over forty percent!!!
nilfun

uncircumsized penises looked gross

No, they don't.
You've made me feel all...oh, what's that word Ang uses?? ~~clucky~~ ~~chooky~~ oh yeah...BROODY!
Take care
aunthill

Congratulations Stinkypantz!
Having a baby is a lot of fun, a lot of work, a lot of sleepless nights, a lot of heartache (but that gets better when they are out of their teens). Then there are grandchildren!
My baby is 31, so I will use my daughter's recent experiences: She had an epidural, which slowed the baby's heartbeat, so she had to have a C-section and that's no fun at all! Baby boy, happy healthy and uncircumcised. However, it seems that a lot of babies these days are experiencing Urinary Tract Infections, which our little David did. And doctors, seeing all too many dollar signs, seem to be into doing this very upleasant test to be sure that urine is not backing up into the ureters (the little tubes that run from the kidney to the bladder, thereby causing very bad kidney problems.) Little David had this test at age 8 months. What they do is catheterize them - without any anesthesia BTW, fill the little bladder to almost bursting with water and look to see what happens after that! Because he is uncircumcised, it was more difficult to catheterize him. Consequently he screamed through the entire procedure, then he had such pain on urinating that he would scream and scream for several days afterward.
As I said, my baby is 31, so when I had my babies disposable diapers were not the rage, same with the epidural. It was brand new 31 yrs ago, and the anesthesologist told me I had to sit still for about 5 minutes after it was administered. I told him I didn't think I could sit still that long when I was ready to deliver (4th baby and all that.) Guess what? He didn't make it in time and I had the baby with no anesthetic! It wasn't that bad - IMO labor is much worse than delivery. (I had diaper service [cloth diapers] and I wonder if maybe the disposable diapers contribute to these UTI's.)
Good luck and happy reading!
I breastfed all my babies. It is really convenient AND a money saver. No getting up in the middle of the night to warm bottles, etc. Just change the diaper and put baby in bed with you. (No, I never worried about "suffocating" the baby - I don't sleep that soundly.)
LyinEyes

Wow , were gonna have a baby at JWD soon!!!!!!!!!!!!! Better get started SP........hehe.
The book what to expect when you are expecting is wonderful.
Take the folic acid vitamin if you can 2 months before you get pregnant.
Sit back and enjoy, sister, you are in for the ride of your life. My kids are 16 , 10 and 8, and they are my joy and yeah sometimes my headaches too, but worth it all.
About labor, everyone is so different, I would just read up on all of it, and keep an open mind, when you go into labor you have time to make your choice on natural, no drugs or an epidural. Even if you have to have a c section, all the things you learn will help you in that too. I had two vaginal delievies and 1 c- section. The latter took alot long to heal, but all in all , each birth was a beautiful moment.
There is nothing, in the world like having your babies, it is a feeling like you are in the best dream ever , and you look at that baby and can't believe that it is all real.
I didnt breatfed my first two, I thought it was gross, and thought of it with my last, but wasnt able to , because he was sick,,,,,, but I think I had made up my mind to at least try it,,,,,,,, I will always regret that I didnt try with the first two.
That is just my advice, is read all you can,,,,,,,, do what feels good to you , and just do what comes naturally.
Keep up posted SP.
LyinEyes

Wow , were gonna have a baby at JWD soon!!!!!!!!!!!!! Better get started SP........hehe.
The book what to expect when you are expecting is wonderful.
Take the folic acid vitamin if you can 2 months before you get pregnant.
Sit back and enjoy, sister, you are in for the ride of your life. My kids are 16 , 10 and 8, and they are my joy and yeah sometimes my headaches too, but worth it all.
About labor, everyone is so different, I would just read up on all of it, and keep an open mind, when you go into labor you have time to make your choice on natural, no drugs or an epidural. Even if you have to have a c section, all the things you learn will help you in that too. I had two vaginal delievies and 1 c- section. The latter took alot long to heal, but all in all , each birth was a beautiful moment.
There is nothing, in the world like having your babies, it is a feeling like you are in the best dream ever , and you look at that baby and can't believe that it is all real.
I didnt breatfed my first two, I thought it was gross, and thought of it with my last, but wasnt able to , because he was sick,,,,,, but I think I had made up my mind to at least try it,,,,,,,, I will always regret that I didnt try with the first two.
That is just my advice, is read all you can,,,,,,,, do what feels good to you , and just do what comes naturally.
Keep up posted SP.

We've decided to have a baby! (Advice needed)

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