I am leaving the JW's . I am alone and scared. Advice and help needed please

by scared and lonely 161 Replies latest jw experiences

  • James Mixon
    James Mixon
    Damn Nathan, is there something we are missing here. Do you know S&L...
  • berrygerry
    berrygerry

    Go back tell them you we're having some issues but through pray you have had them resolved. Never admit to being on any apostate sites. After your back in start preparing your self for a new life out side of the cult. Then when your prepared better start fading away.

    I totally agree with this.

    If your story is real, then as an Elder, you should know what kind of mental-issue caused you to have a meltdown.

    Tell your Elders about this stress, and that you need support.

    Then, PLAN your fade and escape while building a life.

  • ILoveTTATT2
    ILoveTTATT2
    I still say there's something not right with this story !
    A kid playing a prank to see if he can suck in some evil bad apostates and take their money as well. ???
    Ok fine... the rest of us get it! DON'T GIVE ANY MONEY TO THIS PERSON!

    It's been said a couple of times already that the money part sounds fishy. The person apologized.

    Now, can those who say it's a scam just move on and tell this person some advice?

    If this person is legitimately in trouble, then advice costs nothing.

    It's very easy to say simply, "I am not giving you any money, but here's what you have to do:"

    Is cruelty really necessary? (Some other comments, not the one I quoted).

  • Beth Sarim
    Beth Sarim
    I don't know, there's just not something right with this S&L situation. Something just doesn't gel.
  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    Welcome S&L!

    I was a bethelite and elder when I began waking up, which for me was a process that dragged on for years with the help of prescription anti-depressants and the mind-numbing noise from WT Corp. I started coming here and learning TTATT while I was still conducting the WT study.

    I didn't know what the hell I was going to do either.
    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/159978/why-im-loser-dont-know-what-do-fix

    Between clearing my head and finding a new focus, I decided on a new direction. Sometimes I was lucky and things fell into place, sometimes I used a hammer to get them to "luckily" fall into place. In an odd turn of circumstances, I was removed as an elder, and I went back to school for a degree. There were plenty of times that I felt scared and lonely... but those are just FEELINGS. I found that the only reason I really felt scared was because of my financial situation, which I then focused on. There were some rough times, but I made it through much stronger and more confident. I 'felt lonely' because I was no longer surrounded by the "friends". Frankly, I found that I was happier alone than with them.

    Since the time of my "thread of self-loathing", I completed my degree and got myself a career. I make more money in three hours now than I received in most month's bethel reimbursement. (In just two hours on a day like today when I rack up overtime.)

    In case you're interested, here's some of the suggestions I've posted for faders:

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/253592/exjw-psychology-101-keeping-your-cool-while-fading

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/254990/exjw-psychology-102-how-ask-question-when-questions-arent-allowed

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/255058/exjw-psychology-103-lets-reconsider-confidentiality

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/256052/exjw-psychology-104-one-way-play-depression-card

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/270595/exjw-psychology-105-you-ready-big

  • Pete Zahut
    Pete Zahut

    I've got to say, there's a lot about this situation that doesn't add up. Unless you are extremely young, I can't imagine how someone who qualified to be an Elder could be so lost as to what to do. Hopefully you are just being overly dramatic about your situation and things aren't as bleak as you describe.

    Assuming this is all true, it seems to me that if in fact you are losing your place of residence and your employment because of a change in your religious belief, you very likely could have a legal case against those who are discriminating against you.

    I'd go to the local police and explain your situation and ask them what would happen if your parents told you to leave but you refused to go. It may be that they would do nothing in a case like this and especially so if they know the situation in advance. This could buy you some time to find another place to live.

    I'd also look into free legal advice that may be available in your community or one nearby organization that advocates for those being discriminated against and find out what your rights are if an employer fires you because of religious reasons. I'm sure there is a government/labor/ human rights kind of agency in your area that might be interested in knowing what your are going through. You knew enough to set up a gofundme account, it seems to me you'd know that a few well placed Google searches could tell you everything you need to know in terms of human rights and employee rights. Armed with this information, you may be able to go to your employer and show him what he will be up against if he fires you. I'm assuming that up to this point he has been satisfied with your work. It would be highly suspect if he were suddenly claim he wasn't satisfied with it and have it coincide with your leaving the Witnesses. You could also let him know that if need be you'll be informing his customers what he's doing to you.

    If any of this is true, it seems like you are allowing this to happen to you as if you are powerless. My goodness, you are virtually letting them run you out of town. These folks only have as much power as you give them. You sound as if you've given your self over to them and are making it easy for them to walk all over you. I'd say no more about your thoughts about the beliefs of Jehovah's Witnesses or discuss anything with them until you have your head together, know your rights and have a plan.

    In the end, it sounds as if it is high time you got shaken out of your postage stamp sized JW fueled dream world. If this is a hoax, hope you had fun.

  • Nathan Natas
    Nathan Natas

    James Mixon said, "Damn Nathan, is there something we are missing here. Do you know S&L..."

    Frankly, Jim, I think far, far too many newer ones here are naive beyond what is useful -- AND I'M NOT ALONE IN THAT OPINION.

    I may not know S&L, but I KNOW THE TYPE.

    I'll bet that in fourteen more years, after you've seen a few more of these mini-dramas unfold before your eyes, you too will join the "Nutass" crowd who refuse to let sad sob-stories and simpleton emotions sway them.

    If I was consistently wrong in these matters, why would Simon tolerate my continued presence for 15 years? The only ones who downplay the significance of longevity are those who DO NOT HAVE IT AND LIKELY NEVER WILL.

    I am one of a handful of SHEEPDOGS on this board who feel a duty to protect you unsuspecting SHEEPLE from WOLVES. It may be true that some SHEEPLE are frightened by the growl of the SHEEPDOGS, but we growl for your BENEFIT. Perhaps someday you will appreciate this.

  • Wasanelder Once
    Wasanelder Once

    Hate me if you must but I'm calling Bullshit on this. Don't give money to internet self promoters. No one sent me money and I went through a lot of the same things. Get over yourself and move on. As I said, hate me if you must but don't fall for this sort of scam.

    Edited to add: Nathan, I didn't read any more posts after the first two and decided to comment as I did. We are both on the right track I think.

  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    I am one of a handful of SHEEPDOGS on this board who feel a duty to protect you unsuspecting SHEEPLE from WOLVES.

    Great. Now there are self-appointed elders on this forum. What next? Ex-jw judicial committees?

  • cyberjesus
    cyberjesus

    The other day I got an email from a guy in Nigeria who was in trouble and needed my help... at least he explained in detail why he was in trouble and why he couldn't do it any other way.

    Difficult times call for desperate measures... I guess they don't have go fund me accounts over there that's why he asked for western union transfer instead.

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