The first thing i would ask your friend is WHAT DOES SHE WANT TO ACCOMPLISH
if she merely wants to get something things off her chest, then is she "prepared for the possible backlash"
if she is then i would suggest following the many suggestions already offered, BUT AND THIS IS A BIG BUT
if she is Not prepared for the backlash then she is going to have some major issues that she could avoid
i noticed the following in your post:
"confrontation with her Dad"
that doesn't sound like her dad or family are "really" interested in her views, instead like most jw they are programmed to get you BACK IN LINE
re: her fading.
If it is her goal to fade away, well confronting jw family members is not the way it is done, the whole purpose of Fading is to simply avoid having to go round and round with folks whose minds are completely closed-
is she prepared to be DFed or to DA herself, if so , then full steam ahead, in my exp most folks are not prepared and what do i mean by not prepared, one of the first things that a person in my exp needs to do is to START BUILDING A NEW CLIENTE OF FRIENDS so that when they do make thier move and confront family or jw "friends" the lose of such ones from thier lives can be lessened by having folks already in place as friends to do things with
so many folks come here on the net and while they think they are ready for a showdown at the Old Coral- the fact is they often come here asking WHAT SHOULD I DO NOW, THE ELDERS ARE AFTER ME
well THIS is all a part of preparing oneself mentallly for that-
one of the biggest mistakes i see former jw make is to think that somehow if i can show them this proof or this evidence THEN I WILL WIN, please you must be smoking something
if you had stated that her dad/family had concerns about the org as well then she would have a chance to at least reason with them, but according to your post you stated the following:
Her family is very devoted to the WTS,
to me the fact that they are not questioning, not doubting not having any concerns , but instead accept the wt as the word of god, means that she will perhaps have a harder time
while it is true she can plant the seeds perhaps , but as you stated below:
and she expects that she'll have only one shot at presenting her defense to him
well if she approaches it correctly she will not have JUST ONE SHOT, but if she trieds to cram all this info down their throat then yes she will have on one shot
i tell folks all the time, the same way a person becomes a jw is the same way one leaves
it is NEVER ONE SCRIPTURE that is read to a householder and next week they want to get baptized, instead it is usually a long process covering many months and sometime YEARS to get a person into WT
well the same is what i see happen when folks leave, rarely have any of us been shown one article on an wt error and said,
"I got to get the hell outta here"
instead it is a process, and denial is the very first thing that happens
take a look at this board, we see jw come here daily read all these facts and at the end of the day say
Yes the wt was wrong, but it is still the truth
my point is it is a process and it is one that CAN'T BE RUSHED OR FORCED ON A PERSON
it would be real sad to see here lose all contact with her family due to taking the wrong approche\
go up on Randy's site and read the exp of Amazing and how he got his family out
it is the most classical approach i have seen, while it may not work in all cases I know for a fact that just shoving alot of Xeroxed copies of the UN, wt errors in dogman rarely makes an impact UNLESS the person is already having issues
if the person is happy as a lark then one many times creates more issues than they have to deal with
there is no right or wrong way, but over the years many of us old timers here on the net have seen which approach produces better results and which way produces the worst result and "Confrontation" rarely works cause the person veiws themselves as going up against an AGENT OF SATAN and they are the agent representing Jah and his way of doing things
with that as the mindset of the person one is talking to how realistic can one be to expect that they will make some head way
i would suggest reading the following:
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/7798/1.ashx
it highlights an interesting opinion on why PROOF, FACTS, EVIDENCE, ETC have very little if anything to do with convincing folks that their life long CORE BELIEFS ARE WRONG
my only suggestion is that your friend make sure she is prepared for the outcome, esp if it may not be positive
