"Worldy" girfriend or JW girlfriend... Help me choose...

by Confucious 80 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Confucious

  Jo,

  We're annonymous here, so I have no problem saying that, yes... I, along with MOST guys (not all), but MOST guys would have no problem "trading up" with a girlfriend.

  I will admit that most guys, once they are married, would not test the waters outside.

  But call me a jerk, but being totally annoymous, yes. It's bad, I know. But you have a chance with a girl that looks like a fashion model, and a lot of guy would at least consider jumping ship.

  That's what I'm considering.

  I'm not married. Maybe being a little mean. But, I would consider.

  My ex-wife was a JW. Yes.

  When I was pulling away - I had lots of problems with the elders.
• 

  joannadandy

  Next question...(still deadly serious here)...how old are you? (ball park--if you wish to stay so annonymous)
• 

  Confucious

  I'm 34.

  Current GF is 30.

  JW girl is 21.

  But for the record, she's not the first 21 year old I've dated since being divorced.

  I actually perfer girls in their 30's.

  But this girl is a mature 21. And I'm not just saying that.

  So it's also not just the fact that I'm "enthralled" that a 21 is showing interest in me.
• 

  Enishi

  I can sort of understand where you're coming from, I've meet witness girls who made me want to remain a good dub, no matter what the cost. Still, most of that was just the hormones talking. Unless this girl is interested in you partly because you got in trouble with the org., it's probably not a good idea.

  Second of all, you should consider your girlfriends feelings first before you even suggest breaking up with her for another girl. If you dump her just because you found someone with better looks, not only will it be cruel but it will probably backfire on you eventually.
• 

  joannadandy

  It just strikes me that a mature 21 year old virgin JW super model material girl wouldn't really be serious about a 34 year old divorcee who is a non-practicing JW...not to be hard on ya man,(I'm sure you're great! ) I just think you are chasing after a unicorn here...a unicorn that will try and stab you in the ass and get you to read watchtowers again.

  Just my opinion...and you did ask for those.

  Best of luck to you in whatever you choose...
• 

  Confucious

  Jo,

  Again, I'm annonymous here, so I'm going to toot my horn.

  I'm a young looking 34 and a former athlete.

  I make almost a million a year (not from being an athlete, but in a business that some would consider prestigious) . I am very succesful and well know in my area.
• 

  lovinlife

  Hey confucious, nice to meet you. As a woman that used to be that beautiful girl as a 21 yr old JW (now an old "worldly", df'd, 41 year old), I can tell you that from what you are saying you are considered a catch! Money, older ("he can take care of me"), great bod, and good looks! And even though you might have pulled away from the dubs for awhile, that just makes you more enticing. I would be careful if I were you. If she is a sheltered jw, no "fun" in wicked ways, she may find you very appealing, thinking that she will be able to have freedoms she does not have now. She may be a very different person after she gets a taste of that freedom... someone you may not even like. And, since she does not have any other experiences to compare these to, she may eventually want to experiment even further...away from you. I don't mean to be pessimistic here. But, I would just say...make sure you really know this girl before you even hint to her what you are talking about here. Find out what her intentions are regarding the JWs, how strong into it is she?

  I wish you the best! Listen to your heart and head for sure....be careful what the "bad boy" below tells you. Run it past your head first! Good Luck!
• 

  Confucious

  Lovin,

  I know how the game is played.

  I honestly feel I've kept my looks over the years. I actually work pretty hard at it.

  But I do know that it's my money and earning power that makes me attractive.

  People might say that I'm shallow for liking beautiful girls. But I also don't blame the younger girls because I know I'm a man that knows how to take care of a woman. I don't think they are shallow.

  I think they are being realistic.

  But, I do understand your point.

  I married when I was 22 and by 25 I had become a whole different person than at 21.

  Thanks for your insight.
• 

  Sassy

  you have to make up your mind which way you are swinging regarding JW life. If you don't plan to go back and stay there, why build a life with a JW? your goals are different. True you might pull her out, but then again you might not. I grew up in a household with mom a JW and dad not one, it wasn't an easy life and it eventually was the reason for their divorcing.
• 

  BooleanX

  Hey confu, I think you're making a bit of a blunder of the situation

  I don't think the point is whether she's hot or not and you current girl is so so. I'm not sure. Heck I haven't seen either of them. Speaking from experience, Im close to same age as you, 28. I left the Borg bout 5 years ago. I've had relationships in the Borg and outside in the 'world'. And I can say that worldly women seem to have their heads screwed on properly. They go to college and they know the game more than us in most cases. I use to be engaged to a sister when I was 20, (because as you know, everybody gets married in the troof about that age, just to get laid), and she was a stunner, absolutely gorgeous!

  Well anyway we were together for bout a year, but due to circumstances things didn't work out. Why? Because it was lust not love. The same situation happened with alot of young brothers and sisters. My friends who were in the Borg, simplied got married quickly just after meeting a hot sister at the assembly. 3 months later they'd get married, (to get laid). Believe me my friends marriages are so screwed up and it's worse when kids are involved.

  I'm currently living the best girl in the world, she's smart, beautiful and has a load of common sense. More than all the girls I knew in the troof combined. But it's your life mate, just let the big head do the thinking and let the little head do the fun!!!

  Good Luck with your choice anyway!!!