My turn to ask some questions

by Lady Lee 62 Replies latest jw friends

  • waiting
    waiting
    I am blunt, insensitive, oblivious and quite impatient - I'm not really a 'people person' and it's something I find difficult. While I like to think I'm cold and logical (really, I do ... it's the programmer in me) I'm more likely to be putting on a front if I appear that way as I normally get quite emotional about things. - simon

    gee, I can imagine all the foregoing in Simon. But I also saw him trading dopey kickboxing stuff with Dana in Fla. (sorry, neither of you were very good). I also saw him holding his son while his son was speaking in some kinda foreign accent I couldn't understand......but he & Simon were just jawin' right on over some toy. (I think it was Minimus' look-alike statue.)

    A computer geek ..........but a very nice one nonetheless.

    waiting

  • waiting
    waiting

    If yes then why stay?

    I can't leave until Waiting learns how to bake a decent cookie. - 7 (the gourmet cook)

    Well, that sucks. I just got around to reading more of this thread. I can make cookies........I just choose not to.

    Actually, I would have to remember how to make the things first. - almost bought some of those pre-sliced thingies in the store the other day....but I know my kids would ask me the damnable question "Did you actually make these from scratch, mom?"

  • Badger
    Badger

    • When you first came here what did you expect?

    To find a frank, honest discussion about the witness from an objective point of view.

    • What were you looking for?

    The same.

    • Did you find it and if so how?

    frank and honest, yes. objective, no.

    • If you were looking for information how did you look for it -
      • ask a question?
      • wander through the threads?
      • use the search utility?
      • other?
    • Where there other places that helped you find what you were looking for? If so where?

    Pathways Online, Silent Lambs, Watchtower Observer

    • How did you feel coming here at first?

    A little nervous

    • How long did you read before signing up and posting?

    A few hours

    • What made you feel safe enough to post that first time?

    A thread about separation...the very thing that set my doubts into a flat spin.

    • If you came across some of the flaming on here, how did you feel and what convinced you to stay?

    I'm not hurt by it...a lot of the people here, myself included, have been through a lot with the org. This is our chance to vent and act, well, unwitnesslike. My feelings aren't hurt that much by a rough comment. I've learned to take it in stride and consider it a sore issue with others. Political threads can get out of hand, which is why though I feel strongly about my positions, I'm a better service to the board to back away. I stayed because I want to make it work for my sake and those I've grown to love, appreciate and respect.

    I'm not sure if I qualify as having been here "for a while," but...

  • How do you feel over-all about this website?

    • I can't get enough. It's really refreshing. It truly serves a purpose, especially those who are unsure about leaving the org. Simon keeps the tone as suppportive as possible, and that's important. A prospective fader who came across a flamewar site would probably be convinced to go back to meetings. It does what it's designed to do.

  • Do you still come here for the same reasons as you came in the beginning?

    • Sure. My fade is going to be rough. I've picked up a lot of great Ideas and friends.

    How has the board changed?

    I know I haven't been here that long.

  • How does this affect you?

    • Very Well!

  • Have you thought of leaving? If yes then why stay? What keeps you coming back?

    • NO. Not till I get hooked up...

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    • When you first came here what did you expect?

    I wasn't sure. SimpleSally told me how much support she had gotten from the people here and recommended I come here after making my final decision not to return to the KH. I thought I'd check it out.

    • What were you looking for?

    Friends, people who understood what it was like to be out of the JW life that would understand where I was coming from as I deal with the transition as well as make life long friends along the way

    • Did you find it and if so how?

    For the most part yes. It's taking a little while to feel part of the group, but I haven't been slighted either which I appreciate.

    • If you were looking for information how did you look for it -
      • ask a question?
      • wander through the threads?
      • use the search utility?
      • other?

    I started a couple of threads on things I was feeling and questioning. I appreciate the responses to them.

    • Where there other places that helped you find what you were looking for? If so where?

    This is the only place I went

    • How did you feel coming here at first?

    A little nervous. I was known for being admin/mod on a JW site in the past, so wasn't sure now that I was out of it and the JW life, if I would be accepted.

    • How long did you read before signing up and posting?

    When I came here in October. I signed up that night. I thought why not dive in and see how it goes. So I did. No one has drowned me yet.

    • What made you feel safe enough to post that first time?

    Couple of Whiskey Cokes

    • If you came across some of the flaming on here, how did you feel and what convinced you to stay?

    I didn't go into threads at first that I thought I might not agree with. Figured I'd start out slow and get to know people first. It helps understand the flaming when you get to know the people in other threads.

    I'm still here because no one has asked me not to be and it has been therapy for me in dealing with my exiting.

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Thank you

    Tinkerbell, lovinlife, BigTex, Valis, seven006, waiting, Badger, and sns for your answers

  • myself
    myself

    ROFLMAO @ Dave

    oh great, now I forgot the questions, I'll be back later.

  • nowisee
    nowisee

    - no expectations

    -just some understanding of my experiences and feelings

    -yes, many were willing to listen and offer support

    -mainly found info by just wandering and reading with curiosity

    -as one new to computers had spent the previous weeks voraciously reading as many exjw sites as possible until connecting with freeminds. randy told me about this site.

    -i felt hopeful, relieved, consoled.

    -i read for one day then plunged in.

    -didn't think much about safety as i had no plans to reveal my identity and took appropriate precautions.

    -do not like flaming much at all, though within my first few posts managed to provoke some flaming myself on the subject of homosexuality. what has kept me coming back was curiousity about current jw events, the insight, kindness and understanding of certain posters, and my resulting affection for them.

    now that i have been here for at least a little while,

    -it is like life, sometimes positive, sometimes negative, sometimes encouraging, sometimes just plain stupid. usually interesting, but if not i just logoff and leave.

    -no, i think i have had my questions and doubts resolved.

    -don't know if it is the board or just me -- definitely not committed to spending every possible minute here as i was in the beginning.

    -lady lee, what keeps me coming back with curiosity and wanting updates is my experience with posters like you, who have been so extremely kind, understanding, knowledgeable and compassionate. lately i have been extremely busy as my work is seasonal and so on some late nights i just come and read for a while, many times without posting, but i am always interested in what is going on with those very special people.

    my best wishes to you, nowisee

  • Piph
    Piph

    • When you first came here what did you expect? I don't know...a nice place to hang out I guess.
    • What were you looking for? A place to vent and talk about my feelings, to hopefully find others I could bond with who have felt the same way I did. Emotional support.
    • Did you find it and if so how? Yes...indeed.
    • If you were looking for information how did you look for it -
      • ask a question?
      • wander through the threads?
      • use the search utility?
      • other?

      I had a few questions at first, and I asked them. After that, I just wandered through threads.

    • Where there other places that helped you find what you were looking for? If so where? Yeah, I started out on Pathways before I came here.
    • How did you feel coming here at first? Kind of shy and excited at the same time.
    • How long did you read before signing up and posting? I think it was the same day...
    • What made you feel safe enough to post that first time? Euphemism was already here, so he kind of provided a safety net feeling for me. ;)
    • If you came across some of the flaming on here, how did you feel and what convinced you to stay? Uh...I kind of live in my own little world, so everytime I came across some bickering I was really surprised. It always surprises me to find out big things have been going on under my nose and I didn't even realize it. It happens all the time. I should just stop being surprised. LOL

    If you have been here for a while now

    • How do you feel over-all about this website? I love it.
    • Do you still come here for the same reasons as you came in the beginning? Yes, although my reasons are a little deeper now...with all the stuff that I'm going through, just reading other peoples' posts helps me preserve my sanity. It helps me remember that I'm doing the right thing and I'm doing what's best for myself. It gives me the courage to keep up the fight and stay real. Thanks!!!
    • How has the board changed? *shrug* I dunno. I live in my own little world, remember? ;-)
    • How does this affect you? It doesn't. I'm sure it's changing...everything's always in flux.
    • Have you thought of leaving? If yes then why stay? What keeps you coming back? I recently realized that my JW friends and family know me on this site now...and probably read my posts. It freaks me out and makes me want to leave. I want to hide. I have said things here that were never intended for their ears and it makes me feel nekkid...and not in a good way. :-o But I need the support right now. Hopefully it will all work out OK. *bites fingernails*
  • Sassy
    Sassy
    I recently realized that my JW friends and family know me on this site now...and probably read my posts. It freaks me out and makes me want to leave. I want to hide. I have said things here that were never intended for their ears and it makes me feel nekkid...and not in a good way. :-o But I need the support right now. Hopefully it will all work out OK. *bites fingernails*

    I know how you feel Piph. It feels like an invasion of someone reading our mail or diaries when they read our words here even though they are here for no personal good reason themselves. It hurts like a personal attack, even though all we want is to be left alone to deal with our decisions and have peace.

  • waiting
    waiting

    For sheer amusement, Dave (7of6) wins - as always.

    Someone needs to warn him, however, that hanging out in a place for years in the outside hope that Janet Jackson will show up to have sex with him is a tad over the top emotionally.

    LL's a professional.............tell him, LL.

    Well, on second thought, perhaps it's pretty normal for a man.

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