by invictus 30 Replies latest jw friends
Thanks Gumby,
I really need to hear that from time to time, because sometimes when I think about last few months and what was happening (and still is) I feel as somebody punched me in the stomach,kind of sick feeling; so it is nice to be reassured again.
Invictus
Not to hog the thread here........but you will need re-assurance for some time.
Even when a person comes to the realisation they have been decieved, and have not been following a path to eternal life, you can STILL sometimes doubt wheather you are doing the right thing. There are some who after many years of being out, have gone back only to find their first choice was correct after all.
I don't know how long you were in.......but for those who were fully indoctrinated in mind and heart, it can take many years to overcome most of the ingrained teachings and lifestyles. Your on the right track. Finding this forum can be one of the greatest aids for your healing in my own opinion......if you use it right.
Gumby
(singing..."Have yourself a merry little Christmas...."
So happy for you!!!
mobbie
Well after two months of silence I got a couple of phone calls from my "best jw friends". Probably motivated by November watchtower instructions, they were nice asking about a family, kids etc, and then came "the" question:
I don't go to meetings anymore. What were these WT studies about that were supposed to prompt loyal dubs to pursue "inactive" ones? I've gotten some "we miss you" calls myself.
Someone told me this weekend about this article. Which mag was it? I'd hate to have to ask for more than one and boost the circulation figures.
My response - I put a Christmas wreath on the door - for the first time in my life!
Good for you. What's wrong with a wreath anyway ? Now, you should plan on going out with your kids (how old are they?) sometime around the 15th of December and pick your own tree.... Bring it into your house (in front of a window if possible) and decorate it. The kids will really enjoy that. And it smells so good, and it is so beautiful....
Invictus,
Good for you! The laughing part is something that I can see happening if I were approached myself with such bass-ackwards reasoning.
Enjoy your freedom. It sounds like you are free from their fear mongoring, self-righteous, mind-controlling ways.
Best,
Winston.
Whatever they decide to do I do not care - they have no authority or power over me or my family.
If only everyone knew that.
Thankfuly our whole family got out intact,and for friends - well we`ll just have to meet new ones.
That's a blessing!!! Cheers!
Thank you all for your kind replies,
Everything seems worthwile when I see my kids(8,10 and 13 year old) all just bubly about holidays,decorating,preparing gifts,etc. It is interesting to see how the youngest one is ,even thou he knows there is no Santa, writting letter to him,taking about raindeers and how he wants to leave some magic seeds so they can eat...I didn`t know but he seems to want to relive those innocent years of beleiving which unfortunately he was not allowed to do. So for now we just play allong with him and my husband and I really want to make this comming holiday one they will always remember.
Thanks again for your kind words of support.
Invictus
"I don`t know what happened to me because I started to laugh so loud my tears were coming down; I just couldn't control myself. Somehow I managed to excuse myself and told them I will be calling later."
LOL, & cheers to you!!!
Actually, this is one of the reasons that I don't go back. I couldn't keep a straight face. This would surely get me into shouting matches with all concerned. And of course, that would lead to confrontations that would lead to other negatives consequences.
I got real good at "keeping my mouth shut" and doing the "poker face" routine before I left.
But I did feel the poker face starting to slip: I was standing over a floor buffer, with this "bROTHER" lecturing me on how wonderful polishing floors was at 2 AM!!! I kept my mouth shut, but I think my face must have been letting the "you've got to be kidding" show!!!
In fact, I probably would have had the most successful "slow fade" ever, if my father hadn't ratted me out and tried dragging me back to meetings.
Honestly, I felt like Barnyard Dog in that Foghorn Leghorn cartoon. That was the one where Henery (spelling IS correct) the Chicken Hawk was determined to get a chicken. Foghorn had the Chicken Hawk convinced that Barnyard Dog was a chicken. So, everywhere Barnyard Dog hid, Foghorn was pointing to the bush or rock that the Dog was using for cover. That is how I felt, with my Old Man playing "meeting attendance cop".
Yes, I'm certain that I would laugh in somebody's face at the wrong time, if I were to "go back". You aren't alone: there comes a point where you just can't hold it in!!!!!!!!
Mustang
