Stacey,
I can see it now.....join our Committed Christians Who Swing Club. Should improve membership.
Truly loving two people (KInd of a response to the Soul Mate thing)
by ADubsFriend 37 Replies latest social relationships
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Stacy Smith
You're too funny Mega. Do I have to join? I'm thinking about becoming a good girl. You know, marry someone, stay with them. Does that still work?
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one_ugly_time
It'll work Stacey.... so long as when you get bored, you are basically honest with your partner, so that you can have fun on the side without feeling guilty ... But since your new love is all prepared for your bi position, I imagine you would probably have pretty good luck letting your next sweetheart move in with you...
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Sentinel
I will say this in earnest. The grass only appears to be greener on the other side. You are treading on ground that does not belong to you, and you are not being fair to your husband. People's emotions are involved. Yours, your husband's and the other party.
If you decide to venture over where you think the grass is greener, it will be a lustful trip for awhile, and then after about three months you will begin to compare him with your husband. You will remember why you've been married to your husband all this time. Maybe you can change your mind after you've had your fling and go back to your husband. Maybe he will take you back after the other person dumps you. Don't expect things to ever be the same. You are taking a chance. Weigh your options before you do anything you may regret for the rest of your life.
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little witch
If you are comfortable being a home wrecker (by your admission that he is married). Then by all means do as you like..
But do not expect normal persons to be respectful of you. Such delusions are unrealistic.
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PurpleV
I met a JW man online and we had an online affair about 3 years ago
You have received most awesome advice here. I agree with everyone, that the one person here who will be hurt the most is your husband. I have a hard time having any empathy for you because of this.
That being said, I do however want to point out one thing: your new "soul mate" is a Jehovah's Witness. He is having a FANTASY with you. You may believe what you will, and have intuition up your wazoo, but I will guarantee you that if you left your husband for him in "two years time when the kids are gone," and he left his wife for you, that he will have a crisis of conscience within months and will go crawling back to his organization begging for forgiveness for "fornicating and adultering" with you, he will be reinstated and you will be left with NOTHING. How old are you? I'm 45 too. The prospect of being left alone with egg on my face, with a husband who is horribly and irretrievably hurt and a lover who made an absolute fool out of me makes me shudder. What would you do then? And he WILL make a fool out of you. I would consider betting my life savings on it. Double or nothing, that's not bad. Would help out my retirement fund A LOT.
For any JW, the organization is everything, no matter what they say. After the great lustful sex period is over, you will be crispy toast. After all, do you really think you can compete with Everlasting Life (TM) ?
If I were you I'd beg hubby for forgiveness and set about making him very, very happy.
Sincerely, PurpleV
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SheilaM
LW you have two people here cheering you for your stance
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little witch
Thank you Sheila and Thunder\
Honestly....For heavens sakes.....
Occaisionally people come here and say the damndest things and expect support for it....
My arms wont open that wide.......
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Stacy Smith
But since your new love is all prepared for your bi position, I imagine you would probably have pretty good luck letting your next sweetheart move in with you
Actually I've only been with him since I've been going with him. I won't be with anyone else as long as we're together. Interesting thought though and I know lots of couples allow a bi marital partner to go off with someone from the same sex. I won't do that. Making love is too personal for me and I plan to stay monogamous.
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patio34
Hi DubsFriend,
Sounds like a tough emotional position you're in. I don't agree with the consensus of what the posters say.
You're all consenting adults and it's your business only. Religious types are always seeking to impose their judgmental values on what is none of their business. It's not up to me--or them--to approve or disapprove of what you're doing. The only thing to consider is what is best for everyone involved, especially if there are children. Our actions impact others.
Good luck
Pat