New Congregation

by Deacon 43 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Enlighted UK

  And don't forget that if the new "congregation" needs to purchase ANYTHING, including and especially toilet rolls and light bulbs, we have to have a formal resolution to the rest of the folks, then someone else has to second it, then everyone else puts their hands up. Then our new PO will sign a little scrap of paper that he holds in his hand, smile happily and toddle off the platform.

  IT IS NOW OFFICIAL - THE PO's WIFE CAN NOW GO AND BUY SOME MORE TOILET ROLLS FOR THE HALL WITHOUT FEAR.

  Enlighted UK
• 

  Seeker

  Can I be the elder who spies on the flock to catch the secret smokers and those who are having affairs with the pioneer sisters?

  Maybe I could be a total hypocrite and have some affairs with the pioneer sisters at the same time?
• 

  VeniceIT

  Hey HIP!!! I have a better idea! How about a GONG!!! and if the talk is dumb oir boring we dont' have to listen to the whole thing we just GOOONNNGGGG!!!!! Them off the stage WHOOHOOOO we could have fun with this one!!!

  Ven
• 

  THE GLADIATOR

  As a gladiator I never wear a tie and so I wouldn't be allowed on the platform.
  You will need a door man to throw out apostates and I am trained for this gruesome task.
  'Here I am send me, send me.'
• 

  FlabbyCabby

  Is it wholly acceptable that our 'new and vibrant' religion should allow fat people to join its ranks without fear of ridicule and being 'marked' as a person without self-control and abuse of ones own body?

  yes?........o.k. count me in!!
• 

  JW72

  It surprises me how so many people remember bad things that elders and such-like did.

  I must have been so blinkered and naive to not notice anything, oh yeh, and BRAINWASHED!!

  DUH!!
• 

  Mommie Dark

  Venice, great minds Do think alike! I was talking about this with Papa and we thought at first that Hippi should ding the little bell at random just to be annoying. Then Papa came out with the gong/hook thing. Hippikon you up to the challeng of wielding the sacred hook?
• 

  Englishman

  I think that we should have a bar in the KH. Maybe even ash trays for the smokers. Oh yes, how about a contraceptive machine in the toilets. Stools would be nice too. A dartboard for the boring moments, a skittle alley for the competetive one's plus lot of soothing music. Kingdom songs re-written, maybe "Hi Ho Silver Lining" becoming "Hi Ho Wicked Apostates".

  With apologies to Farkel and Jeff Beck,

  Englishman.

  PS, If the above sounds like a pub, then you are absolutely correct!

  ..... fanaticism masquerading beneath a cloak of reasoned logic.
• 

  hippikon

  Ding Ding Ding
• 

  hippikon

  resurected for stephanus