by LyinEyes 36 Replies latest jw friends
You might be an Apostate if...........you find your forsaken bookbag , covered with mold,,and the issues of the WT dating back to 1975,,,,,and the end didn't come.
You might be an Apostate if.........you have a wiener roast and use the bound volumns to start a bon fire in the front yard for all the elders driving by to see.
Sumpin,,,,,,,,along those lines........I am sure ya'll can come up with some things better than this . But , ya get the idea.
you might be an apostate if:
your dog is trained to attack Jehoovers beatniks but leaves the mail man alone
you pin a poster to your door showing a JW being eaten by a rottweiler with a sign saying 'please knock, make his day'
you haven't had your windows cleaned since you were df'd
you stay in bed til a reasonable time on a saturday and have sex rather than waking people up who are trying to enjoy their weekend
you know what's happening in the soap operas which are on a meeting night
the memorial happens and you don't have that gut wrenching dread for 3 months previous about the sheer boredom of it all
you suddenly realise that non christians are real people too
you realise that the world doesn't revolve around your opinion of what is right
You don't need the bound volumes to make a decision in life.
Every earthquake, War, Murder, theft...and so on is not considered to be the beginning of the End for mankind.
You stop trying to rearrange everything to see if it spells Satan.
You stop clapping everytime some finishes talking...very silly BTW
You tell the driver who cut you off where to go and flip him the bird
You love people unconditionally
The last time we were in Dallas we visited in the home of Cruzanheart and Big Tex who had a large beautiful Christmas in a front area of their house where it was easily visible from the street. These folks are two of the nicest people you will ever meet, but I suspect the WTS would consider them "apostate."
So, you might be apostate if you put up a Christmas tree. Bug
You might be an apostate if you don't think your studying of a group of books written at a 4th grade reading level could stand up against crticism coming from men that have doctorates in cosmology, astronomy, chemistry, archeology, ancient jewish history, Hebrew language, ancient Greek, and physics.
you haven't had your windows cleaned since you were df'd
ROFLMAO.
You might be an apostate if you are 32 years old and you just learned how to decorate a Christmas tree.
you might be an apostate if you say "we have new light" and you really bought a lamp
Your "new light bulb" needs frequent changing.....
You have no need to "wait on Jehovah"......
You might be an Apostate if...........you read anything here on this thread, and have a good rip roaring laugh
