Hello

Garrett

Hello forum,

I'm new here and not sure where to post. So, I'm 21 years old and currently a baptized witness, however, I'm slowly making my mind up to leave and here's why.

First, there are certain things that make no sense to me in the organization.

1: Pioneering. While I appreciate people wanting to do a lot in God's service, I feel like they do it only for the title. The new 30 hour rule for auxillary pioneers just amplifies this. Why can't you do your hours without a title?

2: Hours. While witnesses will argue that we count hours to get a global number of how much time we spend as a whole in the ministry, I feel this is wrong. First off, if we love the ministry, do we really have to count up our hours? It seems that the main topic of discussion, especially when you can auxillary pioneer is "did you get your hours in?".

3: HYPOCRITES. This is what's killing me. Every time I walk into that hall, all I see are hypocrites. People counselling others about things that they do themselves. People gossiping about each other. People hating other people for their individuality. People hating gays. I understand what the Bible says about gays, but you shouldn't hate them.

4: Elders: I suffer from severe depression. I made this known the the elders a while ago. They said they would help me if I needed it. For the past 2 weeks I've been suffering from severe depression and have not been to meetings. I emailed to brothers explaining my situation and absence. Neither of them responded to me via email. They've known about my condition for a few years now, and I have yet to receive an shepherding call or encouraging visit.

5: 3 years ago I moved country. All my so called friends from my old hall completely forgot about me. Now, I considered them my best friends, and they have contacted me all but once in the past 3 years.

6: I have no joy when going to the meetings. Absolutely none. I go there, do my responsibilities then leave.

Have any of you had this happen to you? I haven't gone to meetings in over 2 weeks and I think I'm ready to mail a letter of resignation from the organization I don't even want to see a response, I just want to be done with it. I already know that my friends will all leave me and never speak to me again, but frankly, I don't care.

Can you guys help me?.

Londo111

I would not DA. The best thing to do is fade.

I would use this time to read the following:

Crisis of Conscience

In Search of Christian Freedom

Combatting Cult Mind Control

After reading these, I believe you will be able to put your observations, which are spot on, in perspective.

jonza

Also check out jwfacts.com and wttruth.com

Garrett

How do I go about fading, londo111?

I don't want to go back :/

emilynghiem

Hi Garrett
I would suggest you focus on your own relationship with God's truth and vision/purpose for your life first, pray on that daily in Christ, and then you can serve in the church body wherever God sends you.

When you see things that are negative, pray for forgiveness and correction so you don't skew your own judgment with fear and negative thinking.

Treat ALL people whether part of one group or another as fellow sheep.

Some are under one shepherd and some another,

and TRUST that Christ Jesus is the one Shepherd or Lord of all other lords.

so if someone chooses a lesser lord or local law to follow, let them do so.

Consider yourself a guest, and only go where you feel God is calling you.

In order to resolve these issues between "how different local shepherds teach their sheep"

there will need to be a meeting of ELDERS of all these tribes, and reach an agreement

how to correct misteachings going on. For example, JW reject "spiritual healing" when

this can be proven by science. So they are like secular gentiles in some ways, and need

to see scientific proof of this as natural and not against God's laws either.

So look into spiritual healing such as books by Francis MacNutt and Agnes Sanford,

and forgive ALL things first so you make the right decision out of FORGIVENESS not out of fear.

It is not up to us to change things that are going to have be done

using Christian rebuke in Matthew 18:15-20 between ELDERS before the sheep will follow.

Please pray for forgiveness, as they "know not what they do."

Keep following God and the direction he has for your life

and do not worry if it meets or fails the expectations of others.

If you really need to be there, pray to God for how to act so it works out while you are supposed to be there.

When you are called to go, God will make it clear also. Just always pray and always give up anything negative you are worried about up to God and the right answers and wisdom what to do and say will come to you.

Take care! Yours truly, Emily If you need help send me a msg anytime. My bf has a brother who is secular gentile, married to a JW and one of the Elders of JW is his best friend. They get along great even though they disagree about God and govt. They do not reject each other. So if you need help let me know maybe I can ask.

Village Idiot

Welcome Garrett.

It's sad that they emphasize getting in hours but don't spend 10 minutes with their own members when in need. You should find this site to be most interesting and helpful.

Whatever you do, don't put anything in writing. Just fade until they no longer notice your absence from the meetings which seems to be the case already.

cappytan

Garrett: I'm still going to meetings. I'm still baptized. I'm not DA'd or DF'd. I'm a former Bethelite, Pioneer, Ministerial Servant and the son of a COBE for a neighboring congregation.

I give prayers at meetings, run microphones, give talks, been told I'm going to be recommended as Ministerial Servant come next CO visit, all that jazz.

But I'm awake to what the organization is. I'm just not ready to leave without my family. They're not awake yet. So for the time being, I am by all outward appearances a "good" witness.

Ray Franz has been demonized by this organization. But he's anything but a demon. I knew personally his uncle Fred, and I knew some of the Governing Body who were members while Ray was a member of the body. Now, when I say I "knew" them, I don't mean I hung out with them on a regular basis, but I did have close association with them on a few occasions.

I can vouch for his depictions of those brothers.

Ray's book Crisis of Conscience is not a bitter diatribe of a former member. It is a loving and humble account of his struggle with the same things you're going through - doubt, hypocrisy, and what to do about it.

Read it. Truth shouldn't be afraid of light. If Jehovah's Witnesses have the truth, then reading Ray's book won't change that. John said at 1 John 4:1: "Beloved ones, do not believe every inspired statement, but test the inspired statements to see whether they originate with God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world." Paul said at 1 Thess. 5:21: "Make sure of all things; hold fast to what is fine."

Again, I say, if the organization of Jehovah's Witnesses has the truth, then reading a book isn't going to change that. But, if JW's don't have the truth, then your eyes may be opened by a real search for truth.

Don't give up. Don't disassociate. But do like Paul said. "Make sure of all things."

Research, research, research all the doctrines and teachings. "...test the inspired statements..."

And you shouldn't take Apostate's words for it just as you shouldn't take any other man's word for it. You have to test things out for yourself and come to your own conclusion.

stan livedeath

whats the betting your depression will fade as you do .

welcome to the site

OneEyedJoe

It sounds like you're already well on your way to an effective fade. you've made your depression known so you have an "excuse" (in your case it's actually a valid reason, most of us have to have to settle for an excuse to miss meetings) not to be at the meetings. If the elders start to bug you too much, you can always go back a little more for a while, then say you're moving. Go to another congregation just long enough to get your publisher card moved (sunday's only so they don't get too used to seeing you there) and if you talk to anyone mention in passing that you might have to move again soon. Once the publisher card is moved, never go back.

I haven't done it myself (yet) but this is roughly the procedure I've seen laid out a number of times. It leaves you as just a footnote in a congregation where they have no personal interest in you.

You're lucky to be waking up to the realities of life as a JW as early as you are. I wish I'd realized something was wrong before I was married and stuck in for the sake of my wife.

In the meantime, if you ever need to talk feel free to PM me. I'm no psychologist, but I know for me sometimes just writing things out with the knowledge someone else will read it is helpful.

Edit: Also, I'll just say - you're not alone in this by any means. There's nothing wrong with you that you don't fit in there. The things you've observed are universal throughout all JWs, and definitely represents a systemic problem. The organization is at fault, not your average JW who's usually genuinely trying their best to do what they think (or, more accurately what they've been told) is right.

The Searcher

Hi Garrett, It's good that you're here. Welcome.

My wife and I are fading rapidly, so we know how you feel.

Do not act hastily and D/A. Don't play the Org's game. Simply miss meetings on a regular basis. Stop field service immediately.

When Elders call you to arrange a shepherding call to find out why you're failing to live up to their expectations, simply say, "Thank you for offer, but not at the moment. There are things I can only talk to Jehovah about, but if things change, I'll call you."

If you give them any information whatsoever which alerts them to your true feelings, they'll come after you like a pack of wolves.

No information, no meeting with them - simple but effective.

Can you say which country you're in? Doesn't matter if you can't.

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