by logansrun 35 Replies latest jw friends
she thinks that some of you might be good people but are total NUTCASES who are obsessed with the "truth"
gee, I thought that was our line about JWs. As the saying goes "and this too shall pass"... go to the FEST and have fun.. Oh, and here's your drink...
this experience is going to help me greatly !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am heading for a showdown with my family, in a strange S/M way i looking forward to it.
I'm sure i will lose my temper too, however i will try to stay as calm as possible
thanks for the experience
Wow, Bradley, I'm sorry you had to go through that, but I'm also very proud of you for standing up for yourself, even if you got angry.
I had a similar experience with a former JW friend years ago - I'd forgotten about it until now. Like you, I had been going through severe depression... to the point of being suicidal. Finally I hooked up with some exJWs online and could honestly vent and rant to, without being put down or judged, or feeling that I somehow brought it upon myself the way that JWs had been treating my family and me. It was the best medicine for me, to know that I wasn't alone, to know that other people had gone through almost identical experiences with JWs, and to know that it wasn't MY FAULT.
This friend remarked on how much my mood had improved since the last time I saw her. All I said was that it was very helpful to me to be able to talk to people who really understood and could identify with some of the things I had been going through in the congregation. Her immediate reaction was to yell at me for "associating with apostates" and warned me that they would 'drag me down to their level' and 'turn me away from The Truth?'.
Like you, those kinds of statements pissed me off tremendously! She couldn't wrap her head around the fact that my depression was in large part BECAUSE of the JWs, and that BECAUSE of the JWs, I couldn't be HONEST with them and DISCUSS my troubles with them, which made the depression even worse!! She was disgusted that I had found compassion and empathy among people who were "inactive" like me, and who decided that The Truth? just wasn't for them anymore.... yet it was MY FAULT that JWs treated me like a pariah (for no other reason than my being depressed).
It made me realize that there is no way you can "win" in this kind of situation with a JW (or any other cultist). The Organization may have its flaws - which are obvious to them - but they are stuck in the mindset of "where else shall we go?" and there's no other way, in their mind, to get everlasting life than by staying with the Organization.
I hope you have an amazing time in Dallas! I hope you come back home refreshed and happy and so full of life and excitement and friendship, that your mother will wonder why you were never as happy as a JW as you are when you step off that plane after the Apostafest. All a mother wants for her children is for them to be happy. She may not like your choices or agree with your beliefs, but deep down inside she does want you to be happy. Unfortunately, your depression was a motivating factor for her having hope that you might someday go back to the JWs [the old 'get them while they're down' trick], and now she's angry that "you" have blown that dream of hers to smithereens.
Love, Scully
Hi Logan, I dont know your mom personally, however you have your own personal opinion and entitled to proclaim it, It would have been better if you could have avoided yelling. I would love to confront my Elder Dad someday, but im also afraid that I would lose control and say some hurtful things. I dont live anywhere near my dad so Every opportunity I get I try to enjoy the visit, however If my Dad was still a major part of my life and lived near me, we would be having many colorful discussions. I would love to sit down with him and explain to him why I feel the watchtower society is a destructive mind controlling organization that destroys families and childhoods, maybe someday the opportunity will present itself to me. In the meantime try to just show your mom love and dont let her comments get the best of you . One thing Ive noticed about JW's is that they always preach against things from the platform and then in print try to soften their stances by saying "we never told you not to go to college" "we never said you couldnt make worldly friends" It always amazes me at the depth of deception and lies they proclaim. Hey Logan I look forward to meeting you in Dallas and am sure you will have a good time touring the city and the sites. By the way bring your cowboy hat and boots as were going to billy bobs to see the bull riding
JG
My mother said that all ex-JWs do is log onto the internet and COMPLAIN about stupid little things -- "this elder hurt my feelings" -- or about looney sayings from CT Russel a hundred years ago.
How does she know that? Does she read the ex JW boards?
Basically, to make a long stroy short, she thinks that some of you might be good people but are total NUTCASES who are obsessed with the "truth" as she calls it. She also said she feared for my life because "there are a lot of evil people out there on the net luring young people away."
lol, Moms *shakes head*, they can be so silly when they are being overprotective!
Say Bradley, have you ever seen how a wood chipper works?
Thanks to everyone who has responded so far. Just when I thought I was "over" the JWs and my mother and I have been getting along -- BOOM! Sometimes I don't think I'll EVER be completely over this. It will be with me to the day I die.
Mulan...my mother has admitted she "briefly looked at" apostate sites. She said it was nothing but hate and "half-truths" which is of course the WT's wording. It's nuts.
Enter Twilight Zone theme....do do do do, do do do do....
Bradley
Sorry Bradley - close relatives can REALLY get to us. Especially, as in this case, a parent you love and otherwise admire.
I was really glad to hear how much she cares about you and is showing it by picking you up from the airport. Even reasonable and otherwise logical, critically thinking people (like SO many here) are still a little helpless when it comes to the conditioning from the Borg.
It's not you. You're doing great.
This might also be part of the 'asserting ones independence from the parents' stages. We all need to break free of their influence at some point, usually in the teens, sailing freely on our own. Your reaction may be totally normal, a part of this process.
SS
Hey Brad..
How ya doin today.
sounds like you and your mother really got into it.
Probably, if your not going to be a J.W., there will be many things in your life that you may not wish to share with your mother when you visit with her.
Glad your going to Dallas and have a good time while you are there.
Sincerely
Special K
