What makes marraiges last

by desib77 88 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Mulan

  Dave has performed many marriage ceremonies over the years, when he was an elder. One thing he always said, that he believed and practiced, is this : "Listen to your wife. Women think differently than men do. They have interesting perspectives on many situations that you will never think about, if you don't listen to her. A married man who doesn't listen to his wife, is no better off than a bachelor".

  I always loved that part of the talks. He was really like that too, and has always listened to me.

  We definitely argue though, and are both unbelievably strong willed and bull headed. Somehow it works.
• 

  Stefanie

  Hope I can make it.

  You already have a great start, no doubt you guys will be together forever.
• 

  Odrade

  Have a good relationship with yourself. Two strong people together last much better than when you are both trying to make the other person hold you up. If you are both strong and standing on your own two feet, then if your partner trips a little, they just have to straighten themselves out, not worry about if it's going to throw both of you off balance.

  I think even couples in crisis communicate. After all, even if you're not talking you sure know it if your mate can't stand to touch you, and if you have a fight, you probably know exactly how the other person is going to react, even before the words come out of your mouth. That's good communication, even if it's not a good relationship. Personally, I think it's even more important to be able to calm yourself down and not hit emotional gridlock. Then the communication actually goes somewhere.

  My $.02
• 

  BeautifulGarbage

  A well trained husband is key! 
• 

  LittleToe

  It's amazing how little things can cause so much irritation.
  Before I left the borg we had a reasonably good marriage, and one thing she really appreciated was that I always put the toilet lid down - LOL.
• 

  outbutnotdown

  I read all the posts so far and they are very enlightening. I was especially interested in this topic, since I am about a week away from my divorce being official.

  So from the opposite side of the coin, I would say that my ex and I didn't ensure that we had enough in common... I think that is very important, but if you have differences they should be respected, not critcized.

  I would also strongly agree with others here that said that COMMUNICATION is very important. We never did well enough in that category either. But, hey, I'm looking forward to my next relationship, having learned a lot of these things the hard way.

  Speaking of that, does anybody know if itsallgoodnow is available?

  Brad
• 

  desib77

  A well trained husband is key!

  This is so funny....it reminded me of something. Before we were married when we lived seperately in diff. cities and he would come to visit on the weekends he would put his stuff all over the place. I had the idea to put a box in the additional closet for whatever he wanted to put in it....it worked perfectly...he started always dropping his shoes, belt.......and so on in it instead of throwing it all over the place.

  The weekend we got married and he moved in with me, I opened the closet that was now his for his stuff and there it was...hehe all in the box! :)

  Desi
• 

  Satanus

  Desi

  That's funny. So, now he lives out of his box? My cat is trying to train me about some things.
• 

  desib77

  satanus...

  hehe, I finally convinced him the WHOLE closet was his... although slowly over the year my stuff has started to spill over maybe I ought to give him back the whole closet as a gesture

  Desi
• 

  Stefanie

  she really appreciated was that I always put the toilet lid down - LOL.

  lol There really are men out there that are that respectful?.

  I also helps when you dont turn all the lights on and make alot of noise, when your mate was up all night with the babies and is finally able to get some sleep.. Sheesh....