Do you think God would mind if you called him an @sshole?? (page 2)

RunningMan

I think Homer Simpson summed it up best when he said,

"Well, Ak, it's because God is powerful, but also insecure, like Barbara Streisand before James Brolin. Oh, he's been a rock. "

So, to answer your question, just ask yourself what Barbara Striesand would do.

Winston Smith :>D

If I can forgive my fellow man their slights and injuries to me, then god can certainly do the same, and do so perfectly, thank you very much. And if he can't, f*ck'm!
6'o9

Exactly!

If god is such a short fused prick as to not even be capable of being as compassionate as 'ole 6'o'9, then I'm throwing in with satan.

A day with the fun loving satan is better than a thousand days with the vengeful, hateful god of the OT

notperfectyet

Now sixy and Winston...< pinches Winstons cheeks>, This was sent to me by my dad, this is the kinda god ..or dog for us dislexics we have..

Illustration given at a circuit assembly in Michigan: There was a farmer who raised sheep and who had trouble with wolves stealing his sheep. He loved his sheep and didn't want to lose even one of them. One day the wolves came and the farmer quickly raised his rifle and killed every wolf he shot at. As he turned his rifle toward a shadow he saw a puppy wolf huddling besides a fence post shivering. The farmer felt sorry for him, picked him up, tucked him inside his coat and took him home. As time passed, the farmer grew to love the puppy wolf and took him everyday to help him tend his sheep. The sheep loved the puppy wolf too and thought of him as one of them. The puppy wolf learned to call the sheep by their names, just like the farmer did. It wasn't long before he grew to full size and the farmer trusted him to care for his sheep while he rode to town to buy supplies. Then one day the puppy wolf was running in the farmer's field and heard howling in the woods. He ran to the edge of the fence and watched as a pack of wolves approached. They seemed happy to see him although he didn't recognize them. One by one they told him of all the fun they were having, running anywhere they wanted, doing whatever they pleased...no one telling them what to do! They invited him to come on the other side of the fence with them. The puppy wolf thought about the fence, and how he'd never been on the other side of it. The more he listened he began to wonder if he was missing out on something. It only took another minute and he dug under the fence and left with the pack. For three seasons he lived with the wolves. They had plenty to eat and did whatever they wanted. It was such fun and he was glad for the choice he made. But winter came and everyone became hungry and restless. It was cold, so cold, where they had to sleep. The puppy wolf began to think about the farmer and how he'd never slept cold and never felt hunger. Soon he heard the leader of the pack announce it was time to steal some of the farmer's sheep, so they could survive the winter. The puppy wolf loudly exclaimed, "NO, they are my friends, don't hurt them". But the leader said, "You're one of us now, do as you're told!" They all began to run fast toward the farmer's property. The puppy wolf reluctantly followed. Soon they arrived and began to dig under the farmer's fence. The farmer heard his sheep cry out so he grabbed his rifle and ran to shoot at the wolves. BANG! He killed one after another and soon was face to face with a wolf backed up against the fence post who cried out, "Wait, don't shoot me. I'm the puppy you raised. I'm your friend. Don't you remember me?" But the farmer looked at the wolf and saw how matted his coat was and how he smelled like the rest of the pack. He said to the wolf, "I don't know you." He raised his rifle and shot.... BANG!!! The wolf was dead! There was silence in the auditorium, and then the brother giving the talk said, "Brothers, when Armageddon comes and Jesus is doing his destruction work, will he recognize you"?

Crazy151drinker

Well that depends on a couple of things:

1) Are you good buddies? If you buddy calls you an asshole you can laugh it off, but if a stranger calls you an asshole well thats a whole different story.

2) Are we talking OT God? In that case youre fried NT God would probably forgive you being that when compared to Him you have the IQ of a snail.

3) Would God even notice?

4) Would God even care?

shotgun

It's all about anthropomorphism, but as long as you're anthropomorphising,

Sixer...I know you learn all these big words in Playboy magazines...they have fine intellectual articles in dem magazines.

NPY...That elder or speaker should have noted that God decided to throw the sheep and the wolves into the same pen when he cast all the demons and Satan to Earth instead of into a Black hole or sumpin.

I think God probably uses the f word...

He said F Adam's offspring, F Abel, F Enoch, F Noah's neighbours, F Lots daughters, F all the nations in the promised land, F they're woman and daughters too, just kill the men and children, F, F ,F...seems to be a common occurance right up till we all got F by the WT organization which claims to be his local F'in reps.

undercover

The God of Hebrew Bible would smite thee.

The God of the Christians would turn the other cheek.

Doubtfully Yours

At times I've felt so impotent about the awful situation of many that I have called God that name and more many a times, under my breath, in my my mind, and aloud too.

I feel he's as much responsible for what's going wrong on Earth as the ones causing it, because he allows it.

DY

run dont walk

I hope not, cos, i call him that everyday !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

frankiespeakin

Well it almost looks unanimus,,you can tell "God" to go f*ck himself and he won't kick your ass.

I especially like the idea that if you call him an asshole he will turn the other cheek,,(NT god is alot nicer than OT god) Oh well you can't run a universe and start getting pissed off at the ants.

new light

Done it before, with no result. Taunted "God" like they did in the OT, saying things like "If your so all-powerful, why can't you show me one sign?" I would then proceed to insult "God" in ways I will not post. I was so desperate for any sign of his presence, one that I could not write off as emotion. Nothing ever happened. No response.

Once in a great while, if a lot of good things happen unexplicably, I'll think about the possibility of a god. I'll pray once again, first in thanks, then for some proof he's listening. Still nothing. Maybe theists know something I don't, but I have no choice but to be agnostic.

Do you think God would mind if you called him an @sshole??

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