A Very Sad Shell-Shocking Day

by Amazing1914 45 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  wannaexit

  I can't imagine that your friends are going back. But to each their own.

  Maybe they are missing the sense of community. Some people need to be part of a group. Perhaps your friends are of this sort.

  If going back is what makes them happy so be it.

  True some xjw are bitter and will say things that are off the cuff. But I believe that an intelligent, reasonable person can look beyond that.

  One cannot deny the "truth" about the watchtower organization. There is plenty "truth" about this organization to make a reasonable, honest person run far far away from it.

  When my husband introduced me to this board he told me to start reading your posts. I enjoyed them immensely and they were very helpful to me. Thank you.

  You have done a lot of good to a lot of people.

  I wish you well

  wannaexit
• 

  DanTheMan

  These people were never "truly out".

  My thoughts exactly.
• 

  gypsywildone

  Jim,

  I am sorry for your loss, but your friends may find themselves less than satisfied as time goes on. If they have been exposed to some hard truths, it may stick with them, & they may find once again running on the watchtower treadmil less than satisfactory.

  I have heard this from another person recently, that had he read some of the hateful things or time wasting garbage on these sites, he would have ran back to the borg. Posters should try to get out of the mindset that now they are free, so they can do what they want like second graders, & f*&^ anyone who doesn't like it. Everyone might want to be mindful of other people's feelings & reactions.

  At any rate, it is not YOUR fault, as I have never seen you be rude, insulting, combative, or any other thing that would give anyone pause. Thank you for your nice, informative posts, & for your good work!
• 

  willyloman

  I still have this sinking feeling that it is high time to have a reality check, and make some changes in the way I deal with people, the sites I recommend, and the level of information I share.

  Before you do anything rash, Jim, I want you to know that it was specifically one of your fearless posts that gave me the courage to start educating my family. That was a little more than a year ago, and today I am happy -- happy, no! I'm delirious -- to report that they've all embraced the "truth about the truth" and are flourishing in their new found freedom. So far, that's six - 6 - people who are better human beings and happier than they've ever been in their lives. You can take a good deal of credit for that and, until just this minute, you didn't even know it!

  Didn't we all learn from the illustration in Matthew about the sower and the seed? Some seed falls on fine soil, some on the rocks by the side of the road. Keep casting seed, my brother, and much of it will bear fruit. I have no doubt that someday, somewhere, in whatever world exists beyond this one, you will be called upon to report on these matters and you will receive hearty and well earned praise.
• 

  shotgun

  Jim

  The thought that your words or actions could do more harm than good seem IMPOSSIBLE to me.

  Your story inspired me and recently I was contacted by a longtime JW friend who is questioning things and he too read and was inspired by your story.

  Your dedication and pursuit of helping others who have been harmed by the WTBTS with both the gift of your valuable time and experience is appreciated by many!

  Your reasoning through the many posts you've made have shown the WTBTS and they're man made policies visibly destroy the very thing they propose to upbuild....genuine unconditional love.

  Jim...if these friends are happy serving an Org which teaches falsehoods, protects pedophiles, and sits in Gods position casting judgement on man, woman and child then so be it...let them return...after 20 years of thinking maybe they just want someone else to think for them now.

  I would never connect God to any decision either for people becoming a JW or returning to the Org....I'm sure he would be quite embarrassed to be connected with them under any circumstances.

  I know we haven't spoken in a long time but talking with you during my trials by fire with the elders helped keep me focused, that combined with your calm demeanor gave me real and needed encouragement.

  Thanks Mr Amazing

  Shotgun
• 

  Carmel

  I'm not about to refrain from saying whatever I chose to say as an xjw. I'm not looking over my shoulder worrying about how I may come across to the next lurker on JWD. We are all unique and wonderful expressions of liberated minds. Coersing us into conservative group-think/speak ain't gonna happen. Ex-annointed or no!

  carmel of the "annnointed suck" groupie class
• 

  barry

  Gday Jim,

  I have allways believed that what the JW religion needs is sort of an opposition group or forum group that JWs can can belong to so they have a voice in the JW community and it wouldnt be necessary to have all these disfellowshippings or disassociations and divergent groups could be accepted into communion as everyone else.

  Of course the WT hasent chosen this course and may not for many years to come. But come it will in the course of time in an effort for the WT to become a mainstream religion. Once respectability is acheived it will be hard to give up. Mainstream religions dont just give up there respectability easily.

  I can only speak from my situation as an SDA where divergent groups do exist I sit alongside people who beleive the opposit to what I beleive but as yet the sky hasnt fallen, and those people who may dissagree with what I stand for still have to accept what I say at the bible study and I thank for them for that or I wouldnt bother to go I would find another group to join. Barry
• 

  ozziepost

  Barry:

  It's a nice thought but it'll never happen! It just can't! A core teaching of the Dubs is the doctrine of the WTS being God's channel of communication with his chosen people. Having such an exclusive role of necessity means there can never be any divergent opinions.

  A true cult!

  Cheers, Ozzie
• 

  JT

  if you want to beleive that these folks went back to wt due to something you said or us here on the site, that is you choice, but these folks are Hodwinking and bamboozling you -

  when i read your post and you indicated that they used the word "ORGANIZATION" at that point i didnt need to know anything else about them

  they still beleive in the old jw line "Where will you go, what org will you belong to"

  that is a line strainght out of jw101 class-

  i just related the exp about my cousin,there is a thread about him and his wife doing much the same thing

  while we feel bad for them , we can't get bent out of shape, i think you need to check yourself

  you see if you had said that this was your mom, dad bro or sister that is one thing, you all grew up together, peed in the bed as little kids, wore each other hand me down clothes, etc, but you are talking about folks NOT RELATED TO YOU, just some folk you have come to know over the years-

  i think you need to really check your own attitude as well- call me cold if you want to, but the fact is to get bent this out of shape as you sound in your post, and i could be reading more into it than is there, then correct me- but you sound like WOE ME WOE ME-

  eqch person is at different levels on the rung out of wt some are higher up the ladder to freedom than others, some fall down a few rungs which is what happened here

  actually in my mind these folks are the best examples of what it means to be a jw- think about this

  we all bitch and moan about IF I HAD KNOWN WHAT I KNOW NOW i would have never become a jw- and while that is true, for i think if most of us had known all the stuff we know now we would have never become one of jw,

  If we would have known that sellign books on sat is a waste of our precious time , 5 sales meetings a week is a waste of prescious time

  reading books that will be worthless in 6 months is a waste of time, if we had known all of that, then we would not have become a jw

  if we knew that -giving up retirement plans, college, developeing hobbies,etc was foolish to do we would not have done it-

  so here we all have been privileged to see thru your post a couple who have been given FULL KNOWLEDGE AND INFO ON WT and yet STILL CHOSE TO BECOME ONE/STAY ONE, then that is THEIR CHOICE

  the biggest complaint all former jw make is we did NOT HAVE FULL DISCLOSURE on what we were getting into THESE FOLKS DO, THEY NOW KNOW THAT THEY will be riding all over the county couting bogus hours, sittting in boring meetings listening to some dudes claiming to be the mouth pc of god

  if THEY ARE WILLLING TO ACCEPT ALL OF THAT THEN LET THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

  and if the day comes when they realize - man we got taken in their CASE THEY WILL NOT BE ALBE TO BLAME ANYONE BUT THEMSELVES

  o my god i wish i had known this was not the truth i would have been the first black man to be President of the USA- smile
• 

  donkey

  Amazing (Jim),

  I no longer post here but still lurk and read a lot (this is true for my decision on all xJW dbs - not picking on this one). I do make exceptions like when one of my friends is not doing well or feeling well.

  You and I have had quite a few in person conversations (live and by phone) so I think you know that I am a pretty solid atheist. Yet you also know that I am the only member of my family who is no longer a partcipating JW. I know you have clung to the idea that there is a God and/or a Jesus. My feelings on this are twofold:

  1. How can someone as intelligent as yourself still give into belief vs logic.
  2. I don't want to destroy your faith because if it allows you to have hope and peace it is beneficial to you.

  As you know too, I am not only atheist but I am almost violently anti-religious. I repeat this for a reason (not just because I am a redundant retard - although I'll secretly confess the truth in that too). My point in covering this is to tell you that just yesterday I thought about going back to being an active JW. I appreciate that others are "out" and "free" and I will never believe anything the JW's teach as a governing doctrine in my life again, but due to my circumstances of being the only family member who is "out" I am so terribly lonely, Jim. I am by nature a people person and I make friends very easily because I can make people feel like a million dollars when I want to. Right now though, I have no friends and outside of work I pretty much just hang out by myself. I am not close to anyone because of the awkwardness of my situation. So I am left with thoughts of going back "in" just so that I can not cause massive division in my family and we can all be together and I can have lots of friends again. It basically boils down to choice between being as I currently am (I have been all alone like this for going on 4 years now and it sucks) or being part of a social group of friends again. My kids will soon be starting families of their own and it is possible they will be JW families so the thought of them rejecting me because they have spouses who would influence them to reject their "worldly/apostate" parent is particularly painful to me. I have endured a lot to keep my family together (details I will not ever mention on a db like this) and it has all been done for my children's sake.

  I do not want to go into further detail here but I hope you can see why people might "return". Some people will return because they still believe its the truth. Others may still have the deep need to be controlled and have a structured life because they have received so much Pavlovian conditioning. And then others just need to do so for social reasons.

  At this point I cannot see myself returning to the JW's. But when one has endured as much loneliness as I have because of my circumstances it is hard to say what I might do in the future. If it wasnt for the fact that i had children and family to look out for who knows what I might do. I go through the full gambit from returning, exiting more forcefully all the way to ending my own life because I see no point to being here.

  So Jim, I guess what i am saying is that you cannot blame yourself. People have their own reasons for acting as they do and you are responsible to yourself. They are resonsible for themselves.

  Take care my friend,
  Donkey