Suicide.... how do you view people who "attempt" it?

by outbutnotdown 86 Replies latest jw friends

  • bem
    bem

    (((((Jwbot)))))

    ((((((LyinEyes)))))) Sweetie, Thanks for sharing your story, Sending you much energy and good feelings. .Take care of you.

  • core
    core
    I can only give my side of it. I reached a point were with debts, trying to bring up a large family, being a JW etc. My mind finally blew a fuse, is how I describe it. I just did not see any escape from my problems.

    Gordy

    Cant agree more with you - the constant pressure of financial burdens, strains of living can become too much so that rational thinking is impossible - been there - seems only way out is death - think you won't be missed and insurance pays off all your debts so family will be better off without you - still feel that way 24 hours a day - cant bear to be alone so that my mind can go over and over all my worries and guilt at wasting so much of my life and childrens opportunities in slavedom to the black Tower of the WT

    Suicide has been descirbesd as a cowards way out but I think any poor soul driven to it must be in a desperate state

    Regards those who "attempt" suicide - possibly several times - different class of problem - such poor souls need attention/support - great tragedy if they succeed in a suicide attempt as a cry for help is what is being made

  • outbutnotdown
    outbutnotdown

    Flower, you said:

    I qualified an earlier post of mine by saying that I hadnt had time to read through all the responses. I was commenting solely on the question in the original post which asked how we view people who attempt or commit suicide. As I already said my answer would be different if you asked about those 'left behind'. I can and do sympathize with both sides.

    Yet, that statement was said in order to try to suggest that this one was not said in poor judgement:

    Most support assistance is in place to prevent the act from happening in the first place which IMO makes a lot more sense than saying 'forget about them, they are as good as dead anyway but after they do it lets have lots more support for those left behind'. That is in essence what your previous post mentioned

    The statement above is a complete contradiction to the other one quoted. In no way can you suggest that this second quote was based SOLELY on the topic posted. Absolutely nothing had been said about prevention before you said that. That gross insinuation and accusation was yours alone and YOU need to take responsibility for it.

    Denial does not eliminate a prior error in judgement.

    Brad

  • outbutnotdown
    outbutnotdown

    Flower,

    No, I am not a "flip-flopper". There is a HUGE difference between SOME and ALL.

    DY's statement had some truth to it because it was not an ABSOLUTE statement. The way that Dede worded it, as an ABSOLUTE, made it virtually impossible to be true. I am not laying blame on Dede. I am simply saying that ABSOLUTE statements leave themselves open to criticism, since the person who posted the ABSOLUTE statement could not have possibly experienced every angle. To be perfectly honest, when I used the word SOLELY in my statement earlier I was guilty of making it an absolute statement and I attempted to explain how I made an error in judgement when I did so.

    Tell me if you feel that I am wrong, but I haven't seen you admit that you made an error in judgement yet here, without excusing it with some other person's "wrong" questioning tactics.

    Brad

  • outbutnotdown
    outbutnotdown

    Brenda,

    Thank you for your comments. I agree wholeheartedly. My question of "who is responsble?" was not intended to suggest that any one person or persons is/are responsible. It was intended to elicit a response much like your last one.

    Suicide is a very sad part of human life, but it won't ever go away..... it just is...... however, the more we try to prevent it from happening and the more we understand those who try it and those who are unwitting victims, the better we are as a society.

    Thank you very much for what you have shared with us here.

    Brad

  • flower
    flower

    ok now that i got that out of my system lets see if I can figure this out. You just said...

    Absolutely nothing had been said about prevention before you said that.

    Really? I could have swore you said...

    I am not completely against suicide. I think if they want to do it, they will find a way anyway, so why not let them? From what most peoples' opinions are they are beyond help other than helping themselves anyway. However, at what point do we lay the law down, so to speak, to prevent them from hurting others, especially the children? Maybe we should focus less on helping the suicidal people and spend the time and money SOLEY on the victims of suicide.

    the last time i checked the word prevent was the first part of the word prevenTION. my response was based on your statement above. so therefore i did not mention prevention first.

    now if I misunderstood what you meant when you used the word 'prevent' i apologize. i took your statment above to mean 'prevent the children of suicides from the pain of losing a loved one'.

    my response was based on that understanding of what you were saying. that is why i said that helping the person NOT commit suicide in the first place would accomplish the same thing as 'just letting them suicide anyway and just focusing on the childrens recovery'.

    it was not an error in judgement it was possibly a misunderstanding of what you were trying to say.

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    I finally decided to stop by and add my two cents.

    I hired a suicide survivor, she is a wonderful girl, very brave. She lives life large, kind of thumbing her nose at the darkness that nearly overtook her. I cheer on those who overcome the dark times.

    My manipulative sister-in-law called me at work once, threatening suicide. She told me where she was, a local hotel room. Then she hung up on me. Heart racing, fingers trembling, I called 911 and asked the police to go check on her. My sister-in-law was right ticked. Whenever she had done this with her grandparents, they had always dropped whatever they were doing and come running. My actions almost got her charged with mischief. I told her I could not live with the burden of somebody else's life on my shoulders. If she ever called me again threatening suicide, I would call the police. Again. She huffed off. That was over ten years ago. She never called me again. And she is still alive.

  • outbutnotdown
    outbutnotdown

    Flower,

    now, for a brief moment i will stoop to insults.

    you're wierd.

    Thank you for the compliment..... you meant wired, right? Or I could think that you meant to type weird...... Hmmmmmmm.......... since life is what I make it, I'll stick to wired. Thanks again.

    Brad

  • flower
    flower

    weird ( P ) Pronunciation Key (wîrd)
    adj. weird·er, weird·est .

    1. Of a strikingly odd or unusual character; strange.

    not much of an insult i know but its the best i can do with someone i like.

  • outbutnotdown
    outbutnotdown

    Flower said:

    not much of an insult i know but its the best i can do with someone i like.

    Are you hitting on me? JUST KIDDING!!!

    Despite my comments/opinions contrary to yours, I also like you. Life is such an interesting little journey, that if we don't take each moment to grow where we can we lose out on so much.

    I honestly do feel for what you have gone through as well and I appreciate your positive comments, such as:

    ((((((Dede)))))) I'm glad you shared that. I think someone who might be feeling the same way your mother did inside should hear stories from people like you and Brad who can give them another perspective on the situation especially if they have children as young as you guys were.

    I had no intention to direct insults at you specifically and I hope that didn't appear to be the case. I do have a very strong passion for people who go through things similar to what you described about Stef and I, considering our ages. I do all I can to prevent that sort of thing from happening and also can see the other side of showing compassion to the person who is inflicting pain on the "other people" involved.

    I could ramble on, but I just wanted you to know that I do respect what you have said, I have learned from it and I am a better person for the exchange of information that we have had.

    Brad of the "it feels so much better admitting imperfection rather than denying it" class

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