intolerance

by teejay 78 Replies latest jw friends

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex
    tex, you're more of a fox than you are a leopard

    Fox? Nah, I'm not that smart. I'm more of a behind-the-scenes kind of guy. I'm the one who sits in the corner and watches the world go by. I leave the cleverness to others. With me, what you see is what you get. I wish it were more (if God is good in the next life I'll be Brad Pitt with Einstein's IQ), but as it is this the hand I'm dealt.

    Chris

  • hillary_step
    hillary_step
    I'll bet the people in "noahs" day reasoned the same way you do today. However only a few souls were saved. Can you feel the raindrops yet??

    You should move to Australia, rain is never that much of a problem there. HS

  • teejay
    teejay
    ... the cynicism and the hurt from dubland is real. -- Czar

    That's something I hadn't thought about, Czar.

    Many ex-JWs still carry a lot of negative emotions from their life as a Dub. For them, differentiating between JWs and the JW religion can be hard. Depending on the length of time they've been gone from the Organization, it might be a little too much to expect them to show recently freed ex-JWs a great deal of tolerance. A person's own emotions and past experience often determine their level of tolerance, as xenawarrior's and bikerchic's own posts in this thread clearly demonstrate.

  • czarofmischief
    czarofmischief
    Many ex-JWs still carry a lot of negative emotions from their life as a Dub. For them, differentiating between JWs and the JW religion can be hard.

    I had forgotten that not everyone here knows that. The blunt fact is that for many dubs, there IS no difference between them and their religion. That's why it hurts so freaking bad. That's why we're all half mad and lash out at different targets. I know for a deep inner truth that most of my rage is directed at my helplessness throughout the JC / reinstatement attempt fiasco. How three men who didn't know me could ruin my life, take away my friends, ignore my letters... all over nothing. Hence my deep and abiding rage; especially at those who just won't listen... I can't see my experience as being THAT atypical. In fact, I know it isn't. Hmm.. odd place to suddenly understand a huge part of myself; but I guess that's what this board is for. My loathing for what I think are meaningless rules, my detestation of those I consider disloyal to my nation, my longing for purity of emotion.

    Do you know that from my JC until just recently I was unable to cry. Not just not sad, physically and totally unable to cry? Even under distress. Couldn't do it. Can't heal if you can't cry... weird... baby steps, baby steps...

    CZAR

  • xenawarrior
    xenawarrior
    A person's own emotions and past experience often determine their level of tolerance, as xenawarrior's and bikerchic's own posts in this thread clearly demonstrate.

    First you try to portray Kate and I as having a problem with one another, (couldn't be further from the truth), then you tried to form a group with your verbiage of "what we're talking about" to try to make it seem as though everyone else was enjoying a nice little discussion here and Kate and I were the bad guys; butting in with our unwelcome responses. Now you try to discredit our very valid points by attempting to paint the two of us as intolerant due to being over emotional. Nice try teejay.

    Here are your words:

    While we might despise the particulars of what they believe, wouldn't/shouldn't we at least understand their mindset... even empathize with them, understanding perhaps better than most why the JW believes, speaks, and acts as they do?

    That's what we're speaking of here. Not so much what or where something is said, but an understanding and, more importantly, an ACCEPTANCE of why it's said.

    You sound pretty emphatic that you believe this thing you preach. If so, wouldn't it have been up to you then to have "an ACCEPTANCE of why it's said" with regard to what transpired before your "period of exile" that led to your being so nasty to those who may have said it? And shouldn't you have tried to "at least understand their mindset...even empathize with them"? Or does this ideal you espouse only pertain to others who aren't doing this or to when it's coming in your direction ? Something about a rafter in the eye is coming to mind here. Or is it a case of "do as I say, not as I do"?

    XW

  • frankiespeakin
    frankiespeakin

    Czar,

    Yeah I was at a point I couldn't cry, I had some tragedy happen and no matter how I tried I couldn't cry,,I knew something was wrong but I couldn't put my finger on it,,I knew something was blocking a natural release of emotion which made me just feel more guilty because I should have been crying. Putting Jehovah first in everthing can have a bad effect on ones emotions. We were suppose to be in harmony with the destruction he was bringing and not feel sorry for any that he kills,,or else you might be next because you pissed him off.

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    teejay I'll speak for myself here, XW can make her own reply:

    A person's own emotions and past experience often determine their level of tolerance, as xenawarrior's and bikerchic's own posts in this thread clearly demonstrate.

    My past experiences have taught me a lot, thank you. I've learned as I've said before to look at what a person is doing not what they say they are doing. In other words if you mess up in my book you have a lot of proving to do, it doesn't come automatic just because you've said you've changed. I know from experience that to truly change you have to put into motion the change, then the feelings will follow and it takes a long time for a person to make the change inwardly as well as to overcome the loss of respect from others.

    You have no idea how big my level of tolerance is and how I will go the extra mile if a person shows an earnest effort in changing. Just because I'm not campaigning for you to be JWD poster boy of the year doesn't mean I'm not tolerating you being here.

    You pose your question as if people are that simple in their thinking for or against, my way or the highway, black and white. There are many shades of grey and they do come from people's past experiences. You speak of live and let live, I say live and learn.

    "I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand."

    The bad news is, when it comes to where we are at in life, it's important to realize we create our circumstances by our past choices. We have both the ability and the responsibility to make better choices if we want our circumstances to improve.

    A wise man once said... "If you keep doing what you've always done --- you'll keep getting what you've got."

  • StinkyPantz
    StinkyPantz

    I have an idea, let's try posting about the thread topic and NOT the person who started the thread. We could just start a thread titled "Teejay" if that's what some want.

  • xenawarrior
    xenawarrior
    I have an idea, let's try posting about the thread topic and NOT the person who started the thread. We could just start a thread titled "Teejay" if that's what some want.

    I have an idea Stinky, let's try reading the original couple of posts made by the thread author and see if what is being discussed pertains to it. You'll see that it does. Unless you don't wish to see it that way and that is okay too.

  • czarofmischief
    czarofmischief
    We were suppose to be in harmony with the destruction he was bringing and not feel sorry for any that he kills,,or else you might be next because you pissed him off.

    You think that's it? I'm not sure as to the exact cause, myself. You're right, we did have a skewed perspective on what was supposed to feel right and wrong regards tragedy. Like, 2,000,000 9/11's couldn't be wrong, right? Armageddon would have been exactly that.

    But I wonder if there is an actual mechanism that created my inability to cry. trauma... emotions messed up somehow... what is this? What am I? Sometimes I stare at myself in the mirror and am like, who the hell IS that? Where the hell did you come from?

    CZAR

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