"The judicial committee of the ---------congregation wishes to announce"
Say Something Jehovah's Witnessy........
by minimus 160 Replies latest jw friends
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redskymedic
I can't for the life of me think of anything that wasn't already mentioned, but I had to say that I'm in stitches reading all of these. Not quite sure if it's funny or just sad . . . I had no idea how bizarre it all sounded when I was 'IN'.
Red
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Chloe
In order to attain ACCURATE KNOWLEDGE, we must INCULCATE ourselves with Jehovah's word.
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minimus
From the songbook----The Women Are A Large Army......Jehovah's Happy People....Living Up To Our Name....From House To House....Myriads of Brothers....Conducting Ourselves As a Lesser One.....Loyally Submitting To Theocratic Order....Walking In Integrity....Do More-As The Nazarites Did....
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JustTickledPink
How about in the "questions young people ask" they always had illustrations of younger bethalites sitting around with one guy playing the guitar. Used to "encourage" younger people to enjoy fellowship and listen to musical instruments.
I used to think, who on earth sits around and listens to one guy play guitar and call that fun?
The illustrations were soooo hilarious.
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PinTail
Circut overseer: Well now we don't want to die at armageden now do we, well of course not. So stay close to your loving elders where you will find refreshment for your souls, and do not be kicking at the goads for this would be damageing to you". Brothers do NOT be saving seats. Youth! have you set a goal for pioneering with a view toward Bethel service? (Good sense: Basicly wasting your life away and beng brain washed that they are happy" happy" happy" happy" happy" happy" working your butox off for three cents a day, and having the pioneering sisters say wow he is so theocratic I want marry him so bad).
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detective
"I love you but I love Jehovah more"
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JH
Brother "x" says that we can eat this
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Fleur
*shudder* the song book is enough to make me physically ill. Hearing one of the songs brought out such raw emotion in me I posted about it "Jehovah Our Rock, our Strength and our might.."
I was talking to one of the siblings who still speaks to me (considered 'weak' inactive JW but has read freeminds and has seen the 'truth' about it but still clings to it somehow) . They said to me that they think that the songs are so drummed into them that they're down into the bone marrow. That happens when you start hearing this stuff "as a fetus".
The Nazarites song makes me giggle, though. "Nazarites, oh how can we be like them? Self-denial was their role..." ROFLMAO. Way to make the lifestyle sound appealing...NOT!
My favorite song though was "Myriads on Myriads of brothers..." ;) LOL
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iggy_the_fish
"...now did Noah reject his assignment,
since he never had built arks before?"
Arks! he he he!