You've worn the pinstripes off of a suit (laugh- but it happened to one brother in my cong!)
You know you're a JW when....
by Preston 39 Replies latest social humour
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moanzy
When 80% of the congregation is fighting over who gets the next janitor contract.
Moanzy
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heatherg
In H.S. biology you had to write a paper disproving your teachers thoughts on evolution, just because your elder dad said so.
Having to sit in the library for all in-school dances.
Only getting to wear thrift store clothing, because we wouldn't want to draw attention to ourselves. Think it backfired.
Getting a menial job that only paid enough to put gas in your car to haul everyone around in field service. Only to be given the occasional dollar for support from your passengers. -
Calihavoc
You know you're a JW when...
you give up the best job you ever had because you miss an occaisional meeting.
you shut out the people in your life who have your best interests at heart by telling you to go to college.
you live with your parents when you're 30 years old, and work part time, and they're proud of you!
you deny yourself every thing you're interested in!
you deny your own God given talents so that the brothers don't get stumbled!
you realize that the "first baby born in the New System" is now a 30 year old virgin with no hopes, dreams or goals!
you waste your life telling people to put faith in a God who resides in Brooklyn Bethel!
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EvilForce
you wake up on a Saturday morning hoping and praying that it's miserable and raining outside so you don't have to go in Field Service.
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MerryMagdalene
Good ones, Cali!
~Merry (of the it-only-hurts-when-i-don't-laugh class)
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Markfromcali
... you have a party with your friends and family on holidays, but you don't celebrate them.
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Markfromcali
... you always have a third person on your dates.
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Sirona
...you can't go to Yoga class but Pilates class is OK
...you can find any bible verse within 20 seconds
...you can't pray with your friends without a man present unless you have a cloth on your head
...unless you're really rebellious your teenage parties had to have at least one man in attendance who was aged 35+ who would watch everything you did
...you think that reading from a paragraph in a magazine is "using your own words"
...you believe that a food exists that isn't eaten, but it is the most important food of all and essential for life
...you think that smoking isn't just bad for your body - it leads to eternal destruction and no resurrection
...the only "pagan" things you avoid are the pagan things you are told to avoid by the old men in Brooklyn (other pagan stuff is OK)
...you think that going to a Christian Church, a buddhist temple (or any building of another religion) could put you under the control of Satan
...you think that God loves everyone, but he is still going to kill most people on earth (any day now)
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Sirona
...you refer to people as different types of animals - other JWs are "sheep", non-JWs are "goats" and ex-JWs are "dogs returning to their own vomit"
...you will accept transfusion of blood "parts" but will never donate blood