by Check_Your_Premises 51 Replies latest jw experiences
sounds like a good plan. I too, have problems with my ex taking our son to meetings, and have resolved myself for the time being to making sure our son has another view on religion, he goes to church with me, and he gets birthdays & Christmas and all the holidays in between.
You have a good strategy. Your kids are lucky...let us know how it goes!
SK
I too, have problems with my ex taking our son to meetings
How old are they? How involved were they? How long has your wife been involved? How long have you been taking your sons? And lastly... how has it been going for you?
Sorry so many questions. That is all I seem to have these days?
Well, unfortunately when it comes to my son being with his father, I don't exist. He takes him regardless of what I say, he does what he wants. He treats me as if I were an interference instead of the boys mother. He still lives at home with his parents, his wife & new son and when our son is with them, he's getting it hand over fist. What am I doing about it? Lots...courts, mediation, it's all in the works now...but in the mean time I tell him that his dad does things different, and when it comes up that his dad doesn't do birthdays, etc. He's 4...there's not much understanding on either side right now for him, but I'm working on it!!
I don't get invited to his meetings, again, I don't exist in his world now, and every step he takes in this direction is going to come back & haunt him shortly. I came to this site to learn about what I'm up against, and boy howdy!
SK
I came to this site to learn about what I'm up against, and boy howdy!
Right?!
Welcome. Sorry to hear about your situation. It is so hard because our job is to defend our children! Even against their other parent!
CYP,
Personally, I think the Bible can be used to prove or disprove any number of things. It's all about which scriptures you "read" and which ones you "explain". The Witnesses "read" the scriptures about Job praying to go to Hell (thus concluding it is simply a place of death) and the "explain" the one about people being in torments forever and ever ("torment" in the Greek can refer to "jailers", thus the people are "jailed" in oblivion -- not tortured).
So attempting to disprove some of their doctrines may be pointless. But there are others that aren't so ambiguous.
Blood is pretty well-documented to be a false doctrine. Look around a bit, but if you can't find what you need let me know. I have an incomplete draft of a document shooting it down.
Forbidding birthdays can be shot down: http://TheBentinel.com/jw-birthdays.html
There's no scriptural support for congregational action against members ala disfellowshipping. Individuals were warned to avoid "bad people", even shun them, but there's no description of the congregation itself forming secret committees and officially labelling someone DF'd.
I'm sure there are others, but those come to mind.
Dave
Even against their other parent
CYP....there are alot of parents out there who use the kids...my ex is one of them. His wife is a treat as well, she's a bit younger than me and just had her first child, but is forever talking over her "man" and telling me my business and what she thinks of me whenever I try to talk to him about our son. She does this in front of both my kids (I have a 16 year old as well). Methinks she's in a sad position and its much easier to hate me than deal with the reality. I try not to react to her...it's hard!
AA: You always have good points & lots of info...thank you for that....I write everything down!
SK...
With JWs, you'll soon realize there is no "free exchange of ideas". They have the attitude that "they're correct, and everybody else is wrong!", and that's all there is to it.
The only thing I have to tell you is that you being the head of your household, according to their own teachings, you have a heck of a lot of power in your hands. Play your cards right.
With a JW in the house, your kids will be indoctrinated. No questions asked. The JW in the house will find a way. Soon the non-JW is viewed as the bad guy, the guy that will soon be destroyed in Armageddon.
I'd get the children exposed to as much extra curricular activity as possible, as well as in their school work, so that their time is well occupied. Otherwise that same time will get occupied with WTBTS stuff and you'll be doomed.
Like if you get them involved in some sort of sport, or instrument playing, etc., that activity can take up the time dedicated to the JW meetings.
It's a complicated game now with a JW at home. Play it right, for the sake of your children.
DY
I was born and raised a jw...until I was 18. I left when I turned 18, for many reasons but especially because my parents drilled it into my head that everything I did as a child would reflect back onto them in Jehovah's eyes.
They would sit with us (my two sisters and me) and have these "family meetings" and tell us how they were scared sometimes because of some of the things we did (stupid things like accidentially swear or say something mean or rude to someone...little things...) and they would tell us, If armageddon came tomorrow they didn't know if they would get to live in the "new system" based upon the things WE had done. Since we were little kids everything that we did NOW would effect THEM in the END. Now, that is a terrible, awful way to grow up!
My point is this...BE CAREFUL! Witnesses are VERY tricky. I would hate for you to get "sucked" in and then have to raise your children the JW way. I think you already can sense that they have their "ways" to get someone involved. I think it's wonderful that you are putting your children first in your life...Don't compromise them, stay strong.
TRUST ME when I say...It's a horrible way to be raised.
~Shell
Yeah I have a pretty good idea which doctrines are weak and which ones are not. It is a matter of doing my homework.
Well the point of my strategy was to try to avoid those "tricky" little ways they will have of indoctrinating the kids. Is there something my above described strategy does not cover.
And to the extent that my wife will find a way, I still have to minimize it don't I?
