Hello Octavia! I'm new here, too, and I like it. This is a real transitional phase we're going through - I'm on my 'official' way out, too. Hope you find encouragement, love, and a laugh or 2.
Peace and Love from peacebaby
peacebaby
JoinedPosts by peacebaby
-
54
Hello
by Octavia inis this jehovah's witnesses annonymous?
hi... i'm octavia, and i'm an ex-jehovah's witness.
-
-
-
6
Know Any Muslim Ex-JW's ?
by peacebaby inabout 3 years ago, my very best friend 'in the troof' slowly started to fade.
she made excuses - she and her husband were too busy running their small business, the baby was sick, the kids had something going on at school, etc... after a while she just stopped.
i thought it was her sometimes-opposing husband.
-
-
peacebaby
Thanks for your thoughtful replies - you've helped me see some things from a different viewpoint.
My friend is a good person, with a good heart, and I love her, and I never shunned her. I didn't reject her - I felt rejected by her. We had been nearly joined at the hips, up to the point she started studying Islam. She probably was trying to protect me, and our respective feelings, by going about it in a secretive manner. I was awfully quick to get my feelings hurt over what I thought she was hiding from me - when I'm sure she felt she was shielding me - fearing it would be an insurmountable stumbling block for our friendship..... and for my being a 'good dub'..... Thanks, Carmel, I see that now....
avishai - I understand now that I haven't felt guilty for loving her - the guilt comes from that slavish WT mindset. I've been feeling guilty because:1.) I don't feel remorse for not hating her, and 2.) I have to hide the fact that I don't hate her. Isn't that twisted logic? That's what the shunning policy is based on - sick, hateful, twisted logic. Yes, Jesus, our exemplar, said it - "love even your enemies", an all-encompassing, surpassing love.
meat pie - I wasn't aware that my statement was an Islamic belief - I didn't get that from my friend, it's something I've come to believe since my association with WTBTS. Even though they put up a good argument as 'the one true religion' , as you said - all religions think they're The One. There are as many interpretations of God as there are people - no one has yet been able to put God in a box. I've seen too many real examples of Christ-like love outside WT[and too many bad example 'inside'] to ever think they'd cornered the market on Jehovah's approval. Only God and His Son are able to read hearts - I'm sure not. Good advice - I'm just gonna love her, as I am assured that God knows best...
I'm going to write her right now, and remind her how much I love and miss her. [She moved 2 states away.] I'm sure if she hadn't moved, we wouldn't be having this exchange - she and I would've figured it all out between the 2 of us long ago...... Then I'm going to write another letter, dissing my association with the hate mongers who will view me with righteous hatred and shun me for being an apostate, too....
I'm finally ready.....
Peace and Love from peacebaby -
25
How would a JW list in order ...
by Will Power inhow would a jw put in order of importance, priority, loyalty
would the list on paper be different than that actually practiced?
jehovah
-
-
peacebaby
will - You said you've been married 20 years, and your wife is a new JW - is she now baptised, or is she studying? If she is baptised, and you're just now starting to have questions - where have you been? I mean, it takes several months of intense indoctrination to become 'an eligible candidate' for baptism.....?
Everything Estee said - DITTO & add: the "don'ts" will overcome the "dos" with phrases like these: 'the public talk brought out that we shouldn't..., 'the Watchtower says we can't', 'Sister So&So said the Bible says we're not allowed...', 'we're taught that JW's don't'... A protection against 'worldly people' - which you are - if you're not one of them...
This must be the 'club' you're talking about!
The simple God-given principles of marriage are fine and pure - it is a sacred unity, instituted by a loving Father. Much is written in the mags about the Bible standards of love, respect, honesty, understanding, loyalty, patience, and trust between mates. It sounds perfect on the 'outside', but the longer you're 'in' the more you learn how they've added and added to the already perfect Word of God - even make it seem like God changes His mind from time to time...oops, then changes it back! The simple and true meaning of unselfish love is lost - squashed under a ton of man-made regulations and restrictions. It's amazing how they come up with the reasonings - they make you believe it - and try to make you like it! I was apalled to learn, well after I was baptised, that there are many rules about where, when, and how you may or may not put your hands, mouths, body parts, etc. - on, in or near your wife/husband - in the privacy of your own bedroom......and a member can be disfellowshipped or disassociated by not following the letter of their laws. If it's divulged that you're not 'towing the line', prepare to be dragged before an inquisition[council of elders] about the details of your most private sex life. Whoa! Does that get your attention? That's just the tip of the iceberg, man....and you're the Titanic.... A friend of mine was 'counseled' that she could 'scripturally divorce' her husband[15 yrs.-4 kids] because he made it difficult for her to attend all the meetings. [He was tired of going without dinner, and really missed spending time with her and the kids...] I hope something gets your attention, and I hope it's not too late.....
You need to read, read, read - get on the web and read everything. Type in 'Jehovah's Witnesses' or 'religious cults' in your search bar - I hope you're totally freaked by what you find --- everyone is! Share everything with your wife in an honest and loving way - discuss everything openly. Before you're sucked in is the only time you're allowed to have a choice, or question, doubt, or disagree about anything. Question it ALL - it's your LIVES. One more thing - wanna complicate things 100-fold? Have children, hopefully not one with a blood disorder. Read the horror stories for yourselves, please?
You'll both be in my prayers today..................Love and Peace, peacebaby -
10
Witness family adopt baby lion cub!
by got my forty homey? inbaby lion cub is very unhappy to find that it was adopted by a witness family and will be forced to not eat cat food with blood in it!
-
-
peacebaby
SD- ROFL! I've not gotten 'into' Monty Python nearly enough, I see! And no, tigers are not dim at all!
peacebaby -
15
It's -34, and I'm shoveling snow!
by Nosferatu inyeah, it's -34 degrees celcius, windchill is in the -50s (i guess their scale doesn't go any lower) and the boss came by to ask me to shovel snow.
various schools have been closed, apparently it's colder here than many places up north, and here i am, an electronics technician who just finished a college course which half was paid by the company, and i'm shoveling snow.
the measley 24 cent raise i got this year isn't worth it.
-
-
peacebaby
I feel for ya, too! Here in northern Indiana, our weather is very unpredictable from year to year. The States still use the farenheight scale - it's probably lots colder there than I think! We've had some very mild recent winters - last year it was 60 degrees[f] the second week of January. Hubby was upset - no ice on the lakes for ice fishing! The worst I can remember was the winter of '78-9. We got a couple of feet of snow with strong winds - they calculated the temp as -70 degrees.
Lots of people lost their electricity - which is the bad thing. Everybody with a snowmobile was out helping neighbors. It took 4 days to dig the roads out with front-end loaders and dump trucks! Don't really need to see that again! .....But then our summers are typically hot and humid. So name your poison! It's cold here now - 15[f] for the high - 3 tonite. The whole northern half of the US, too. I agree with all the old farts(sorry!)- bundle-up! Layers! Extra socks & long underwear! A big fuzzy hat! I'm fartin' dust myself, and really get it in the neck, back and shoulders to shovel. But I do it when it needs done, like around the mail box after the snow plow goes thru. A couple of years ago I permanently damaged my elbow by shoveling a path to the wood pile - like tennis elbow but not as much fun. So I'm not as enthusiastic as I once was, and I listen better to my body parts when they scream,"Stop!" And I take it slower - shuffling along like all wise ol' farts should learn to do! Plus, if I whine a little, hubby will rub my shoulders till his fingers go numb.... he appreciates my efforts!
peacebaby -
6
Know Any Muslim Ex-JW's ?
by peacebaby inabout 3 years ago, my very best friend 'in the troof' slowly started to fade.
she made excuses - she and her husband were too busy running their small business, the baby was sick, the kids had something going on at school, etc... after a while she just stopped.
i thought it was her sometimes-opposing husband.
-
-
peacebaby
- I miss my friend .......
About 3 years ago, my very best friend 'in the troof' slowly started to fade. She made excuses - she and her husband were too busy running their small business, the baby was sick, the kids had something going on at school, etc... After a while she just stopped. I thought it was her sometimes-opposing husband. We both lived out in the country, 20 mi. from the KH, but only 1/4 mi. from each other. We use to go out door-to-door together - we were a great team! We used to talk on the phone almost every day, and always rode to the meetings together - it was wonderful to have a girlfriend that I could talk so openly to about everything under the sun! She was loud, opinionated and brassy, and I was shy and unassuming but always ready to laugh at her goofiness. Our opposite personalities worked to benefit the other's, and our minds clicked together like cogs on the same gear - I loved her like a blood sister. I tried and tried to get her to talk to me about what was going on, 'cause obviously something was... but she'd laugh it off, change the subject and never answered my direct questions. Pretty soon, she was cutting our phone conversations short, not returning my calls, and ...avoiding me... So I let it be for a while, thinking, "Did I say something to hurt her feelings?.... She just must need some space." My Mom died during that time, and she did come to my house and cried with me and gave me a much needed friend's shoulder - but it was a short visit, and her last. Shortly thereafter came a warning call from the PO that she had dissassociated herself... and was studying Islam in preparation of becoming Muslim!!! You could've knocked me over with a feather! I was to shun her, of course --- but she was already shunning me, and finally I knew why! A few months later, her daughter, who was working at a local store, told me they were moving out of state. Without hesistation, I said, "Tell your mom I'll be calling her." She told me how relieved she was to hear that, since her mom had missed me so much, loved me, and felt so badly about not talking honestly to me about the events happening in her life.
So she came to my house and we finally got to hug, cry, and talk openly about things. The whole time she was begging off going to the meetings, she and her husband were studying Islam with a Muslim couple. This is what I've gathered from our few conversations about it - they now believe it is the oldest(?), historically researchable, 'only true religion'. The say prayers to 'the one true God' 'Allah' several times a day, and worship at a mosque. They believe that Jesus was a prophet(not the Son of God - in my understanding because it is blasphemous to assign to God the act of procreation(?)) as well as Mohammed and others. And they are very sincere. So my natural question to her - "If you truly believe that Islam is 'true', then why didn't you tell me, your best friend? If it's so great - why didn't you feel obligated to enlighten me, too? If you believe it's the path to salvation, why keep it hidden from me, whom you love?" Her answer: "I knew how much you loved Jehovah, and I didn't want to hurt that relationship between you and your God." Well, that wasn't a very good answer, 'cause I vividly remember a time when she loved Jehovah very much, too. Years later I'm still trying to figure it out...
Is she not a true apostate, in terms of Christianity, because Islam rejects the ransome sacrifice of our Saviour, Christ Jesus? And in her religion, Christians are 'infidels' and enemies of Allah. I feel guilty - for still loving her....she was and is very dear to my heart, as only best friends can be. We are still in touch with each other via email, but not regularly, and we don't talk about religion. Except I have told her about the big WTBTS quandry I've recently found myself in.... But I still feel that she really has turned her back on Jehovah.
My hope is that one day soon Jehovah will put it all in perspective - and all will know the elusive truth of the matter. I've got this scenario in my head: Jehovah reveals His true self to the entire world... He has the attention of every person, from all religious backgrounds, from every nation on Earth. He states,"This is the way I want it to be." Everyone scratches their heads (I reckon everyone will have misconceptions about something) - "Oh, that's the way it is? ...Wow, I was really wrong then, wasn't I?" Then a loud roar of aggreement heard the world over - "If that's the way You want it, Father, then that's the way we want it, too!" Everyone who truly has a heart filled with love for our Heavenly Father will choose His surpassing way.........those who don't want it... well....won't get the benefits. ------------ Pollyanna-istic? Maybe......
In Christ's Love, peacebaby
-
38
What Motivates You to Expose the "Truth About the Troof" to Active JW's?
by imallgrowedup inwhile responding to another thread, i was thinking about how so many of us talk about trying to help "believing dubs" out from the clutches of the wt, while at the same time, it occurred to me that we probably all have different motivations for doing so.
as for me, i am motivated to get my parents out because i think they have the right to know "the whole story" - not just the candy-coated version the wt espouses, so they can make better decisions about how they want to live the rest of their lives.
right now the wt makes all their life decisions for them - including whether or not they should look at what the "other side" has to say about them.
-
-
peacebaby
imallgrowedup - You discerned correctly - we're all at different places in our emotional and psychological recoveries - and we're also different people with different personalities, backgrounds, heritage, circumstances, up-bringings, scars ..... Unity does not mean uniformity. Just because I say that assertiveness is not in my personality, that doesn't mean that I like that about myself - I look at it as something I need to correct - a weakness. I would rather not cause a fuss - but you know, sometimes a big fuss is just the thing that's needed! I'm shy in most social situations - pair me with another shy person and we'll just smile at each other. That's why I'm always drawn to people with strong personalities - they help bring that out that hidden side of me. ! Good friends bring out the best in each other, so they may learn from me to 'season their sayings with salt', so as not to sound too harsh. I dunno why, but that's the way it's always worked for me, from Kindergarten on....
When I read posts like Redhorsewoman's and nobody told me's[that screen name says it all!], it makes me feel, I dunno, deficient...jealous...guilty....? To take a firm stand - after all, right is right and error should be exposed[and corrected] - instead of letting things happen as they will - is a good thing - brave in the face of adversity, decent and honest. I need that kind of positive encouragement that builds upon my love for the real truth, so thanks to all who give it.
I'm going to start a thread about something that happened to me and my best friend 'in the troof' - that might have colored my view a little on this subject.... she became Muslim....
I still feel that I have too many unanswered questions to be too dogmatic on most subjects. I'm still niggled.... how can I trust my own judgement when I've been duped[but good] into believing the lies with all my heart and mind and strength? Am I being too hard on myself? I don't think so ...I could be like Adam - "That woman you gave me - she deceived me!"... that ol' harlot is to blame, after all...! I'm still workin' on it.... coming more and more to the conclusion that ... the more I learn, the more I don't know! It's the subject of many prayers.....
Remain in the Love of the Christ peacebaby
"Just be patient with me, darlin' - I'm a work in progress!" --- Alan Jackson ---
-
53
In Other Words..............dead
by simplesally in.
rather than say someone is dead some people say funny little things likehe bought the farmhe's taking a dirt nap.
.
-
-
peacebaby
DantheMan-I knew you made that one up!
FlyingHigh- OK, I give - 'gnaw the crank'? Nevah hoid of it!
I don't think anyone said: 'breathed their last'
'passed away'
'went beyond the great divide'
'gave up the ghost'
'Caspered'
'Perma-snooze'
'laid-out' or 'slabbed-out'
'flat-lined'
I've heard this when a car dies - 'It went to the big car lot[or junkyard] in the sky' - which has to be the dumbest thing I've evah hoid!
When a dishonest person[.. salesman, lawyer, politician...] dies, they say,"That guy was so crooked they had to screw him into the ground!" Or when something bad happens after a 'dear one has departed' - "They must be rolling over in their grave right now!" eeeEEEWWWwww
I prefer 'asleep in death' - like 'dirt nap', it sounds peaceful.......but when I wake up, I wouldn't mind takin' a stroll 'over yonder', after I remind Willie that there aren't any more 'blue eyes cryin' in the rain'.... peacebaby
-
38
What Motivates You to Expose the "Truth About the Troof" to Active JW's?
by imallgrowedup inwhile responding to another thread, i was thinking about how so many of us talk about trying to help "believing dubs" out from the clutches of the wt, while at the same time, it occurred to me that we probably all have different motivations for doing so.
as for me, i am motivated to get my parents out because i think they have the right to know "the whole story" - not just the candy-coated version the wt espouses, so they can make better decisions about how they want to live the rest of their lives.
right now the wt makes all their life decisions for them - including whether or not they should look at what the "other side" has to say about them.
-
-
peacebaby
Thank you for the warm welcome everyone!
Hi Maggie! So glad to 'see' you! Can you believe all the broken hearts out there? It's just unimaginable to me.....it makes my heart ache . The only bright spot in it all - our Father is right now wiping away tears and healing hearts. He hears our prayers - and the faith I now have in His love for us through His Son is what keeps me looking up.
I know what you mean about 'trying to convince people of something' for too long. I talked a good talk, too, and am ashamed of the self-righteous, I've-got-all-the-answers, 'you're blinded to the truth' attitude I once displayed. I always thought I had a humble attitude, but I didn't - I learned what the word meant when the 'truth about the troof' humbled me right down to the dirt..... All of my DH's family[never-JW] took the announcement of my 'fade' with relief, and a slight undertone of 'Told-ya-so'. Got a big hug and tears from one SIL - she had a JW aunt, uncle and cousins. The religion caused a huge rift and bad memories in their family.
So, in essence, I told my family, "I thought I knew all the answers, but guess what? I just learned that everything I was so sure of is absolutely wrong! I had it just bass-ackwards! I must be really stupid, blind, ignorant, thick-headed, gullible, a sucker; I'm so confused I think my brain's gonna exlpode!" Do you think anyone would even half-heartedly listen to me now, when I say, "O.K., I've been doing a lot of studying, and now I've got it straight....yadayada..." I can still see it in their eyes - suspicion of me having a lingering mental illness! I can't blame them - LOL! My wonderful DH loves me and supports me unconditionally - truly held me up through the worst of it, even tho' he really didn't get the import of it all - just knew how it was hurting me to the core.... He is a true-blue 'Good Guy'!
I am far removed from any JW friends. I live 'in the boonies', off the beaten path of their travels, evidently. Only ones who stop are the BS conductor, with mags and KMs; and the PO's wife, who happens to be the one who brought me into 'the troof'. I have only talked with her about the lack of love in our congregation. She said 'they don't know how to be real friends.' Hhmmm... If someone did happen to stop for a 'chat', and something did come up in conversation, it would be terribly hard for me to hold it in - I'm afraid it would come spewing out like a perpetual fountain! But I'm afraid my closest so-called-friends have been warned off, as I'm spiritually weak and bad association for not attending meetings..... If I had relatives or parents 'in', I would try, with lots of love and patience to reason with them on something documented, like the NGO thing, the child abuse cover-ups, the switcheroos on the blood, organ transplant, and shunning policies. Then I would get into how and when Christ was replaced as mediator to all mankind by the F&DS...... that really burns me... and I didn't even know it was happening when it was going on - I just numbly agreed with everything presented in the literature, without thinking about the implications..... which is the definition of being a good JW... I may be a little late, but I'm here to say, "THAT AIN"T RIGHT!"
I don't feel I'm called to be a 'denouncer'; there are plenty already and they're doing what they feel they need to do. And that's fine - somebody has to do it! It's just not my personality, you know, to call everyone with the latest bad news. They'll find out the way I did - out of curiosity and in defense of, and with love for, real truth. I feel it has to be an individual journey of discovery that is between one broken heart and God alone. I guess, because this mess was such a devastating crisis for me - a basket case for months - I don't want to be the cause for someone elses 'ship-wreck'. Maybe I'm wrong... I don't know, but .....I feel that my gifts are in comforting, encouraging, empathising with them and loving them - wherever they are on their personal walks.... I know that they are fearful, as I once was, because they[the org.] have made Jehovah into a fearsome, vengeful, killing machine that loves you but will annihilate you for a wrong thought.[How sick!] The harder you work to prove your love to Him, the more certain you are that you are unworthy of 'maybe' being saved at the big A. How that contrasts with the free gift of salvation by grace, from a loving God who wants no one to perish! Hallelujah! Anyway - I'm assured that truth and error will continue to be revealed - revelation after revelation. Side note - I believe the WT will crumble along with all other religious institutions, [organizations, corporations] in the near future - all symbolism removed - hearts exposed....
Philia - Peace and Love through Christ, peacebaby
-
15
Bethel trip
by dustyb inmy g/f today asked me if i wanted to go to ny and tour bethel and wahkill (sp?
) and all the other buildings today.
should i go, or should we just save our money?
-
-
peacebaby
I've read lots of testimonies about Bethel trips..... it has been a real eye-opener for many But you really should've scheduled tour stuff around the Yankee game, 'cause, think about it ----- you'll remember that day at Yankee Stadium the rest of your life! The memory of the Bethel tour will fade in time, like all bad memories ought to do......---....... Love from peacebaby
Peace and Love from peacebaby
peacebaby
Lots of people lost their electricity - which is the bad thing. Everybody with a snowmobile was out helping neighbors. It took 4 days to dig the roads out with front-end loaders and dump trucks! Don't really need to see that again! .....But then our summers are typically hot and humid. So name your poison! 
It's cold here now - 15[f] for the high - 3 tonite. The whole northern half of the US, too. I agree with all the old farts(sorry!)- bundle-up! Layers! Extra socks & long underwear! A big fuzzy hat! I'm fartin' dust myself, and really get it in the neck, back and shoulders to shovel. But I do it when it needs done, like around the mail box after the snow plow goes thru. A couple of years ago I permanently damaged my elbow by shoveling a path to the wood pile - like tennis elbow but not as much fun. So I'm not as enthusiastic as I once was, and I listen better to my body parts when they scream,"Stop!" And I take it slower - shuffling along like all wise ol' farts should learn to do! 