exjdub

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Posts by exjdub

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  23

  I am finally ready to deal with my father...

  by Aztec in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  he's pushed me to my last nerve!.

  i need any proof that i can verify that 1) the last days are not here!

  4) cult info.

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  exjdub

  Aztec,

  I thought what Steve Lowry said was excellent:

  what you really want to do is modify his behavior. Practically anyone's behavior can be modified.

  Your father is really overstepping his boundaries (most JW's do, especially when the Society tells them it is their "responsibility to "save" their grandchildren's lives). If your father does not respect your boundaries, especially if he repeatedly oversteps them after you have gently reminded him, then you need to make it clear that he will not see his grandchildren until it stops. At the very least, not without you being present. This may sound drastic or cruel, but you won't have to do this for long. He will come around. By allowing your father to overstep his boundaries without repercussions, it negates your authority as a parent. Is that the message that you want to send to your children? You are ultimately responsible for your children. If you do not want them in a mind screwing cult, then you need to be proactive.

  If you really don't want to destroy your father's faith, but just want to have him stop "witnessing" to you and your children, than don't undermine his faith with proof that his faith is false. Setting the boundaries accomplishes the goal of having him keep his faith AND his boundaries. My 2 cents.

  exjdub
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  27

  Have others given up trying to communicate their feelings?

  by Celtic in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i don't think i'll be listened to any more, my story is not worth telling, it is too complex, it causes me too much sadness to try to relate it, too much shame and too much internal pain.

  am i the only one that feels that they have given up trying to communicate their feelings here anymore?

  like my personality is a sham, i do my best to cope, to be happy, to be this cantankerous old sod that tries to make out to everyone i'm doing well, but ..... anyone?

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  exjdub

  You grieve deeply, love passionately. Don't be surprised if the faint of heart run for cover. If you were a flower, you would be a six-foot blazing orange orchid, rare indeed.

  Celtic,

  What Gnat said so beautifully is what I have seen over and over again in the short time that I have been here. You express yourself through beautiful pictures and sensitive thread topics.

  You know how some of us guys have to put on a bit of an act sometimes, we have to set our faces into our coping scowl, but underneath, we're too well aware of just how soft we are? Well.

  You said that in your recent topic about men crying over music and movies. And therin lies the clue. You, and many of us here, are soft inside, regardless of what we show. But it is because of that softness that you are able to help others. Your sensitivity, and the deep emotional well that you are, allows you to be sensitive to others.

  In a recent chat session with you I learned that you lost everything when you left the organization. You were about as low as human being can get and all appeared lost. You also said that this board saved your life. You are part of that "life saving work" (and it ain't the preaching work...at least not for the JW's) process for others, even as you continue to go through such deep pain yourself. The ones who are sensitive are also the ones that are sensitve to other's needs and who help so much here...it has sure helped me. You, Celtic, are part of that process. So...thank you for being you Celtic, you are indeed a six-foot blazing orchid. And here is a big hug (((((Celtic))))) from a man who...never...cries...(trying to clear lump in throat...keyboard keys are getting blurry) oh all right Celtic! I admit it! I do cry...

  exjdub
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  12

  JW at my work Part 2

  by Beans in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/12/64911/1.ashx

  so we had our quartley safety meeting last week at work and as soon as i walk in this jw is right up to me all excited telling me about what is going on in his life.

  i really approached this lightly to inform this person as he seemed to have an open mind.

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  exjdub

  Nice work Beans...you are a sly one aren't you? You sure know when to play the cards!

  there was a 1/2 hour talk on facial gestures

  who the...what the...what in the world are they up to now? Was this counsel in the Ministry School or really an entire talk on facial gestures? If it was an entire talk I think they really are getting desperate.

  exjdub
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  15

  Welcome Hauki!

  by Valis in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  greetings and welcome to the forum.

  nice to have you here and look forward to hearing from you more.. sincerely, .

  district overbeer

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  exjdub

  Welcome aboard Hauki, looking forward to hearing from you.

  exjdub
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  22

  I'm ill

  by ball. in

  1. jw
  2. friends

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  exjdub

  you had to go and jinx yourself didn't ya? You had to think about the non flu record...it happens every time. Sorry your sick Ball, get well soon.

  exjdub
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  36

  Entheogens can they be good or bad?

  by frankiespeakin in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  here a cut link and paste:.

  the word "entheogen" literally means "generating the divine within".

  in its strictest sense the term refers to a psychoactive plant or substance that occasions enlightening spiritual or mystical experience, within the parameters of a cult, in the original sense of cultus.

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  exjdub

  I will reply again after I finish my morning glory seeds

  hahahahahahahahaha! OC, you crack me up.

  Thanks for the links frankie, I will take a look at them for educational purposes...

  exjdub
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  7

  Medical Ethics and Child Birth Rights Debate

  by Xandria in

  1. watchtower
  2. medical

  court cases revive childbirth rights debate.

  i saw this article and it got me to thinking.. which can be dangerous at times.

  but, this is a situation that would affect women and families terribly.

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  exjdub

  Well said Avishai, and you are right, they are seperate issues...however...I think what drives people crazy is that when discussing the cases that you (Avishai) see as a counselor, it becomes very clear that intervention is needed, and I understand where you would have a problem with a crack addict deciding health issues for their baby, especially because you see the end result. The problem is the government or the hospital/medical community has a tendency to take those cases and run way overboard with it. They think they have authority to do what they want with ALL expectant mothers and their babies.

  The case is one of several in recent months that have revived a debate about whether mothers have an absolute right to choose when, where and how they give birth -- even if the health of their baby is at stake.

  Notice this paragraph does not say anything about drug addicted mothers or alcoholic mothers that damage their children. They include all mothers. When the powers that be start deciding "whether mothers have an absolute right to choose when, where and how they give birth--" that makes me nervous. Before long they make it illegal to deliver anywhere except a sterile hospital room. That is infringing on an individual's rights to do something natural, just because the government thinks they know what is best for everyone.

  Sorry for the soapbox...I just have real issues with government (and yes religion) always trying to decide what is best for us.

  exjdub (who was born a few years late and should have grown up in the 1960's instead of the 70's)
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  63

  What first gave you doubts ?

  by rick1199 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  we all know the big problems with the wts, but what was the first thing that made you realise there were problems with the organisation ?

  with me it was realitivly small stuff like an 8 year old getting baptised and a comment my best mates made about another of our friends asking if we should be hanging round with her as she might be bad assciation (she had just been reproved, but they had been mates 20 years).. .

  how ever the first time i ever thought something was really wrong was when i was about 11 and my grand farther died, and mu mum wouldn't go to the funeral, i remeber thinking that surely it was better to say good bye properly than worry about if the service was in a church.. .

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  exjdub

  That is a difficult question. I NEVER believed that the prophecies in Revelation were fulfilled through the WTS, even though I was an MS at the time. There just was too much stretching to make it believable and too much fulfillment after the fact (trumpet blasts and the pouring of the bowls, etc.)

  When the pedophile report aired on Dateline, that pretty much did it for me. By that time I had already been in active for 5 years or so. But still, I wondered if maybe it was my view that was wrong, maybe I was being too critical...maybe they did still have the Truth and I was being disloyal and not "waiting on Jehovah. The final blow that removed ANY doubt about JW's having the Truth:

  The UN/NGO issue that I found out about on this site. End of story. I know the WTS is wicked and corrupt. Thank you JWD, you relieved the burden of indoctrination and guilt. Prior to that I knew I wasn't going back...but I thought I was going to be destroyed for it. Now I know that it is all hogwash!

  exjdub
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  36

  Dallas Will Never Be The Same... With Pix

  by Country Girl in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, it was quite an exciting weekend!

  the best fun i've had at one of these ever!

  around 48 people showed up, and it was great to meet all the new people, and visit with the ones i already knew.

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  exjdub

  What a great looking bunch! Happy faces...hmmmm...apostates with happy faces...hmmmmm...I think I'll stay with you for you are a happy people. After all, where else will I go???

  exjdub
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  18

  Calling my JW sister.....Help and Advice, Please!

  by lisaBObeesa in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  it has been a long time since i spoke to my sister?a year or so maybe?

  i made a promise to myself to give her a call in the next week or so.

  i also promised my counselor, so i really have to do it!

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  exjdub

  Anyone have any advice, support, or stories of how you maintain a relationship with a sibling or family member who is a JW ?

  I have a very similar situation, however I was never able to resolve my difficulties with my only sister, and we have not spoken for 3 years. I did try to re-visit the issues with her, which is what it sounds like your counselor is trying to get you to do (although I don't know that for sure obviously), which did give me some closure. I realized in the end that I did everything that I could to improve things between us. Ultimately, by her actions and words, she chose to break the relationship. That has helped work things out in my mind.

  Sometimes people just won't let a healing happen...I think this is especially true with the Organization. Is your counselor familiar with the JW's and the issues in connection with disfellowshipping and shunning? That would be an important component in my mind. Good luck with your call...I hope that you are able to sort things out, or at the very least, get some closure.

  exjdub