It would be a long time coming before Dave and I fully get back in the swing of things if ever. You see yes, we are still married and yes there is still a strong bond between us, and love there. But it is a different kind of love for me now. I have not really moved on. Because I wasn't raise that way. But in the past I have. And Dave still has to come to terms with that. He may have forgotten but he has never forgiven. So yes I made mistakes huge ones. I turned to someone else when I felt that I wasn't loved or needed. I honestly think it was harder for me to deal with all the deamons going on in his head that it was to deal with life. I no longer was his obession or passion. And I was miserable. Dave is a great guy who deserves happiness and love. I think when he came looking for me he didn't know what he was getting. I wasn't sweet and inocent by no means. But I wasn't the school tramp either. But I could recall not fitting in at school or anywhere. I still don't fit in. And I am okay with that. Life goes on. And right now Dave has to heal from the hurt from his dad, stepmom, stepdad, mom, grandpa, and his JW family. His non-JW family in KY are the best. They are what family should be. Supportive and caring. Kinda like my family.
But I will sign off now. As this unfolds a little more I will share my side of the story and maybe a little more about my background.
Amanda