Husband said that everyday is the best day as long as he wakes up beside me.
Friend said, "You look so great! No...really really great!" (Working out at the gym hard lately)
Jez
Posts by Jez
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58
Please help me, I need advice on dating a JW!!
by Super_Becka inok, i'm new here, so please be gentle.
maybe the advice i need is somewhere else in this forum, but i really don't want to have to search for it, i really need some advice now and i don't have the time to sift through all of the other entries here.
so please bear with me and share any and all advice you have, even if you think it's not what i want to hear.
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Jez
Wow, SK, that was powerful. If that doesn't make her stop in her tracks and think, nothing will.
I pm'ed you.
Jez
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70
Jan 1st WT: Reaching out, Higher Education and Providing for one's needs
by truthseeker inwell, as a nice start to the new year, the jan 1st watchtower article, "how firm is your trust in god" blasts those who live comfortable lives, those who don't reach out, and those who pursue higher education.. definitely, they are taking a harsher stand, having completely painted themselves into a corner.. i highlighted the interesting comments.
i did not include all the text for each paragraph, just the main points.. .
1 a young man wanted to be more useful to the congregation.
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Jez
Because the GB do not live in the real world where necessities must be provided by oneself they cannot comprehend how difficult it is.
Good point. You know I said in my post about reinstatement that the church that I went to before constantly encouraged a trusting of oneself, that since we were made in God's image, the answers were within each of us, and that answer is not the same for you as it is me. THEREFORE, why can't they just trust their members to be balanced, to make the right decision for THEM, why can't they just trust that through prayer and meditation, they can find the answer as to whether or not they should go to university or college, THEMSELVES??? AGAIN, this makes me so ANGRY, because members are being taught to rely on the GB, when they should be taught and encouraged to rely on themselves and their personal relationship with God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What is right for one is not right for all, what is wrong for one, is not wrong for all!
Grrrr. Jez
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58
Please help me, I need advice on dating a JW!!
by Super_Becka inok, i'm new here, so please be gentle.
maybe the advice i need is somewhere else in this forum, but i really don't want to have to search for it, i really need some advice now and i don't have the time to sift through all of the other entries here.
so please bear with me and share any and all advice you have, even if you think it's not what i want to hear.
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Jez
When you fall deep in love with him, and think you have a future together, and the shit all hits the fan,ie, his parents find out, his family and the elders...
he will choose them over you. He will feel guilty, but inwardly triumphant because he has gotten validation that this is the "truth" because even in the face of irresistable temptation, (you), he stayed faithful to Jehovah. There is nothing that can compare to that kind of martyrdom for a JW.
If you do stay together, you will always be the wicked unbeliever, the poor misguided soul that thinks she is getting some spirituality from her wicked church, the one that needs conversion, the one that won't obey her head (husband) and stop celebrating the holidays, etc.
Remember, in the beginnings of a relationship, people say and do things that are not entirely true because they will not risk losing each other. Some deep seated beliefs and values will rear up later, especially if you marry him. Once he has his clutches deep into you, it WILL all surface. You may ask him questions now, but he is not going to answer them 100% honestly. He has been taught exactly how to thwart any potential conversation stopper, he doesn't even know it, but he is a master at conversation manipulation, half truths, masking, emotional manipulation, answering the question without answering the question, redirecting the conversation, one-sided arguing, and outright lying. IT IS HOW WE ARE TAUGHT! Ask any of us!!! To become self aware, is almost impossible and extremely painful and difficult. YOU can't get him there, it is something that he has to do on his own...and it doesn't seem like he wants to. You THINK he is answering the question, but he is probably just saying what he knows you need to hear, to stay. It may not seem important now, but someday, it will be the most important thing to both of you...and that is your deep seated values and belief system because these will act as a filter through which everything else is seen through, every decision, every argument, every disagreement, every compromise,
every perception. Be afraid, be very afraid.From what you have said, he sounds like an immature wimp. Dump him, stay in university, and find someone there that matches you, let him find someone that matches him.
Jez
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70
Jan 1st WT: Reaching out, Higher Education and Providing for one's needs
by truthseeker inwell, as a nice start to the new year, the jan 1st watchtower article, "how firm is your trust in god" blasts those who live comfortable lives, those who don't reach out, and those who pursue higher education.. definitely, they are taking a harsher stand, having completely painted themselves into a corner.. i highlighted the interesting comments.
i did not include all the text for each paragraph, just the main points.. .
1 a young man wanted to be more useful to the congregation.
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Jez
The thing that bothers me the most is the premise that higher education is for greedy people that want material things in life. Education is about so much more than that, what about getting a fulfilling career, something that you enjoy doing, not 'have' to do for $, reaching your potential, expanding your mind, increasing your knowledge base, security, brain exercise, etc.There are so many other reasons that people choose to go onto higher education, but giving ONE reason only is obviously an argument meant to sway the R&F a very specific way. Educated people would see right through that form of manipulation.
This is just wrong, and it seems like many witnesses know it. Jez
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26
9 years since i saw my jw son
by orbison11 inyes, 9 years.
we have chatted once and emailed a few times,,,,,, well last night he emailed me and wants to meet this weekend,,he is almost 25,,,. we are about an hours drive apart and will meet in the middle, i am so afraid to damage the meeting,,,i want so much for it to go well,,,, he is no longer a jw (thank goodness) and hasnt been for many years now if the other 3 would only come around.
wish me luck:).
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Jez
I can't imagine the pain you have went through for the last 9 years!! I hope that this is the beginning of a new relationship with your son. GOOD LUCK. And I was going to say what LadyLee said,
Let him take the lead. He asked for this for a reason. Let him tell you what it is and take a deep breath and follow where he leads.
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Question regarding my nephew
by caz ini'm the aunty of 3 the boys i wrote about a few weeks ago who had lost their jw father to suicide.
my (16 year old) nephew has come to live with me and he has been brought up as a jw all of his life, although not baptised yet.
he hasn't made one mention of them or meetings at all since his father's death, ( 4 weeks ago) other than to tell me he was very disappointed in the lack of support shown his dad by the elders of his congregation during his lowest moments of depression and to the boys since.
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Jez
Is he receiving counselling at all? Given what he has been through and that he is not really talking, it might be a good idea for him to talk to a "worldly" counseller.
Jez
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56
Do you still *want* to believe?
by daniel-p inif the answer is "yes," please explain why.
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(i don't think this question needs explaining - i think you all know what i'm talking about.
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Jez
Defd is proof of being able to maintain that they ARE a witness, while not subscribing to 'all' of their teachings, so is he really a Jehovah's Witness? My friend once said, "Yes, when it comes to the important stuff." lol
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56
Do you still *want* to believe?
by daniel-p inif the answer is "yes," please explain why.
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(i don't think this question needs explaining - i think you all know what i'm talking about.
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Jez
I never 'really' believed
-that God was going to destroy 99.9% of the population.
-that paradise was going to come in my day.
-that paradise was going to look exactly how they said it would. I had my own version.
-that a wife is in subjection to her husband.
-that JW were the only ones that God approved of.
-that if I didn't get 10 hours a month, I was not worthy.
-that the holidays were not meant to be celebrated.
-in disfellowshipping
Well, you get the picture. I think the reason alot of ppl can continue as witnesses is because they don't 'really' examine their faith or why they believe what they believe or buy into EVERYTHING 100%. So, I don't want to ever go through the motions again for any other reason than I wholeheartedly believe and understand why I am doing the things I am doing or why I am being asked to do things or agree with things etc. No more "going along to get along" for me.
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If spirits exist, and really communicate with some people, then why...
by AlmostAtheist inif spirits really exist, and really communicate with some people, then why don't the people ever ask anything that anyone cares about?!?!.
"when did you die?".
"did you own any pets?".
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Jez
"We don't die" Conversations with the other side. Author: George Anderson
Very interesting book. Says that the spirits don't answer questions that they think we should not know. He says that he does not control the conversation, THEY do and they often have a very specific agenda.
His best guess as to why they don't answer the "what is over there" question is because if we knew, it would change too much of how we lived our lives. Bascially, the philosophy that "it is not the destination, it is the journey"
Jez