Posts by Thegoodgirl

51

Sorry, I need to vent for a moment...

by Abandoned in

jw
friends

normally, i don't mind where i'm at in my life.

i'm forty, no kids, low-paying job, live in a trailer court, etc (and trust me there's more to the etc, then i've already mentioned), but today i had a hard time.. one of my best friends from high school was a big dope head (no offense to the dope heads out there).

he showed up nearly every day to our first period art class smelling of weed and was generally so whacked out of his mind that he got horrible grades.. he finally graduated - barely - and made it to college.

Thegoodgirl

It's the dang JWs, not you. I can relate to things the JWs took away from me that I am permanently missing due to them (social skills, etc). Others say it better than me, but in other areas of life, you are doing much better than the people you ran into. You have introspection, and you are a great guy. Remember, you're not seeing all the crap they may be going through now. Things change drastically, and I'm sure your life will improve in the direction you want it to. Hang in there.

57

I had the baby!

by unbeliever in

jw
friends

i had the baby on 11/21/06.

we named him dylan rhys.

he's a cute little thing and such a good baby.

Thegoodgirl

Congrats! What a cutie with those cheeks! He looks much older than a newborn from the pictures, a real cute "little man".

The Good Girl

73

AT 1:26PM FRIDAY OUR DAUGHTER WAS BORN!!!

by Es in

jw
friends

well its all happend, got to the hosp early friday morning, had my waters broken at around 7:30am had to wait for an hour and a half to see if labour would begin naturally, it didnt so at 9am i was hooked up to the drip, man that was intense, put it to you this way, blakes labour was about 8 hours all up kaia's labour was 3 hours and i would rather go through the 8 hour one anyday.. it was a very short labour, kaia was born a bit shocked as it happend so fast so she was rushed up to nursery for a bit as she was purple and not breathing properly but after an hour on oxygen she was fine, me on the other hand had to be stitched up coz pushing a 9 pound 1 baby out naturally with no drugs does damage heheh, then i had to be hooked up to a drip for 4 hours as i lost a bit of blood.

but once we were all sorted it was all good.

she is doing so well we are at home now, she is beautiful and very content.

Thegoodgirl

Congrats ES!!! What a beautiful girl. She looks like she has a little attitude already! Very adorable. And I'm glad you parents dropped in too.

38

Remember Me?

by prophecor in

jw
friends

my voice hasn't been heard here in quite some time.

i just wanted everyone to know that you all are truly missed.

since having no access to the internet, i no longer can keep up with all that's going on, from the inside-out.

Thegoodgirl

Proph! so sorry for all you are going through. Moving at all is so stressful, but under your circumstances, I can't imagine. I hope the new place soon feels like home as well. YOu have been missed, and I remember your thoughtful posts well. Take care.

The Good Girl

17

To Benefit the Lurkers and Newbies - tell your story again!!

by AK - Jeff in

jw
friends

a nice grouping of stories regarding our time in and exit from the borg would aid all the newcomers here.. how about a paragraph or two [the condensed versions] of how we all found ourselves here today?.

jeff .

Thegoodgirl

Okay, here is The Good Girl's story:

I was raised a JW since toddlerhood. Grew up being the shining star JW daughter of a single pioneering mom. Was auxillary pioneering in summers, and over winter break. But since age 13, I had doubts that God existed. I would try to supress them. Eventually it was all I could think about. I went ahead and got baptized anyway at age 14, at the urging of the elders and my mom.

Finally I tearfully admitted my doubts to my mom at maybe age 15. I was really depressed throughout high school. I would try to actively be a perfect JW, but inside I really doubted. My mom was big on telling on our friends, and would teach us to feel extremely guilty about ourselves. So of course I didn't have many friends in the congregation (I was too "good") or outside (of course no associations with worldlings).

The cure for my doubts was to study the "Creation" book with my mom from cover to cover. I did, and I still had doubts. So the elders had me study the "Creation" book for a second time with another pioneer sister in the hall. About halfway through, she told the elders it wasn't working, I just was determined to beleive in evolution. The elders met with me and told me I needed to learn how to be logical. They also suggested cleaning out my closet of anything that was handed down to me from someone else--MAYBE THERE WERE DEMONS IN THE HOUSE. (Gotta love those thorough elders.)

So I got a 100% scholarship to any college in the state. I chose our local community college, like a "Good Girl" and finished a two-year degree. By that time several events had happened to help boost me out the door in my decision to leave the JWs:

1. My little sister was DF'd, and there was no way I was shunning her.

2. A guy in the congregation who had a crush on me killed himself a few months after I turned him down. He had told me that he would never love another girl. I couldn't take seeing his mother three times a week at the meetings.

3. My dad got into rehab for alcoholism, and the rehab was working. He was able to help me find ways to get housing scholarships so that I could move out and go to a university in another town (he's not a JW.)

4. I had enough, and things just became clearer to me over the year that I really didn't beleive in the JW ideas. It was a bunch of baloney. I also had the emotional support of my beloved late grandparents who were always fully supportive of higher education.

So I finally got that housing scholarship and moved 4 hours away to another town. Went to one new meeting to make sure my publisher cards got there, and then never went back.

Moved again six months later to change universities (academic decision) so they really lost track of me. Dated a bit, got married, moved far far away from my home state, and now live JW-free with contact with all family members, though we are often "walking on eggshells" in conversation. And then I found ex-JWs online and the rest is history!!! I am living happily ever after.

53

Do you hate Jehovah's Witnesses?

by The wanderer in

jw
friends

do you hate jehovah's witnesses?

since becoming a member of this board, it has often come.

Thegoodgirl

No, but I do hate cults and the mind control.

The Good Girl

26

lil ol' me

by gay pride in

jw
friends

hi my name is crystal...i am 20 and was disfellowshipped two years ago.

that was the hardest thing i have ever been thru in my life yet.. i was disfellowshipped for falling in love with and having relations with another female.

tried to fight it for a long time... but shit happens.

Thegoodgirl

Welcome! That's so awful how your family is treating you. It sucks to have them in a cult, doesn't it? It's someone else controlling their mind. congratulations to you for getting out. I think with time, you will be able to think of "old times" with a smile. And hopefully some people from your past will also see the "truth about the truth" and leave too. Then maybe you'll find some peace knowing you are not alone.

I just had coffee with a friend from my childhood who was DA'd. She is also gay. We had a great time remembering old times. I apologized to her for ever treating her bad, or shunning her, telling on her, etc etc. She apologized to me for some stuff too. It was a great reunion. What I'm saying is that it took us about 8 years to be able to get to that point. I know that with time you'll find peace too.

19

JW Divorce Rate

by sandy in

anybody know what the jw divorce rate is these days?.

how many dub couples do you know that got divorced?.

.

Thegoodgirl

Well, hardly any. You see they are disfellowshipped by the time it gets to a divorce, so they are no longer a JW. So it looks better for the numbers! Just like there are NO JWs who smoke, do drugs, etc. That's because they're all disfellowshippped, so then they immediately don't count anymore. What a clean congregation!

87

What if she never leaves JWs? (The interminable waiting period...)

by AuldSoul in

jw
friends

this has nothing to do with whether i love my wife.

i always will.. pragmatically, i have come to the devastating conclusion that i don't want to be married to a jw.

any jw.. she asked me last night, "so, do you believe in santa clause, now?

Thegoodgirl

Auld Soul,

Not sure what to say. It must be so so difficult to live with someone who has those feelings for you. I'm sure that if she was out of the JW cloud, she would suddenly have utmost respect for you, especially because you were smart enough to leave the BS before she was.

I wouldn't blame you either way you choose. I think communication is always helpful in my marriage. Keep telling her that she is making you feel like you aren't living up to what she wants you to be. Keep telling her that she is sending the message that you aren't good enough. Keep telling her. Maybe she'll eventually get the point that you are a person who needs to be respected, not just her and her feelings of who she wants you to be.

16

need help

by jem12 in

i was raised in the truth but was not baptized.my wife is and enjoys going out in service but i have found out from her twin sister that while i was away in alberta working she was cheating with a brother from her hall.after coming back and finding out about this and her telling me her sister is lying i found photos of them at dinners bowling and so forth, also i found nude photos of her and after me talking with her and her lying about them that her sister took the photos the truth finally came out it was a man she met from her work that took them,this is a christen women who fears jehovah why would a person with such strong love for her religon do this.after me finding these things out she kicked me out of our house.... please help me find an answer.. because deep down i still love her..

Thegoodgirl

So sorry to hear about this. I don't know what to tell you except that I hope you are able to step away from this situation and have some peace. I hope you stick around here, these people can be quick with their opinions, but for the most part are very supportive when one is in a crisis...