hi, i'm new to these forums so i thought i would share some experiences of when i was a jw.. i was born in 1976 into a staunch jw family.
my grandparents, parents, aunties, uncles, cousins etc etc were all jw's going back to the 1950's.
when i was a child my parents, like a lot of jw parents, didn't let me have worldly friends.
Hi
I can empathize with you very much. I too started having panic attacks and all sorts of physical symptoms associated with anxiety. It has got better the longer that i have been out. I hope that you dont mind me making a suggestion. Why dont you enrol in a university distance learning course and get a degree. This is what I am doing and i really enjoy it....it sort of brings a sense of self worth that i lost when i left jws. Only a thought.
Chukky
of all the privileges only brothers may have, doing mics seemed to be one of the most tedious.
it was definitely something you could graduate from... but why?
when i was the sound guy, it was always so hard to get brothers to do the mics.
Hi
In my old cong, there were 2 particular elders who liked all the public speaking privileges but never once in 10 yrs covered the microphones or attendants duties...even when we were short of bros.
chukky
my wife and i disassociated 3 months ago and my wifes mother is still a jw....but.....she still sees us regularly.
today, a 'clipboard' elder went down to see her.
he has been her book study overseer for a year and has never once gone to see her even though her husband is dying.
HI
My wife and i disassociated 3 months ago and my wifes mother is still a JW....BUT.....she still sees us regularly. Today, a 'clipboard' elder went down to see her. He has been her book study overseer for a year and has never once gone to see her even though her husband is dying. Anyway, today he goes down to have a go about her still seeing her daughter, asking her whether she thinks what she is doing is right. My mother in law point blank tells him that she could never stop seeing us. I needed to tell someone about this because i get so angry that elders/people in org. are so unloving, so uncaring. To try and destroy a precious relationship is so unloving/despicable.
Incidentally.....sice our disassociation. a 10 yr old witness girl is shunning my 5 yr old in school.....CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!!!!!!.........................why can't these people see what they are doing to families?????
.
if shunning was stopped as a result of society policy change, do you think that there would be a significant exodus out of the organization????.
chukky
If shunning was stopped as a result of society policy change, do you think that there would be a significant exodus out of the organization????
chukky
one of the things that i could not reconcile,which led to my disassociating myself was this:.
i have a daughter that needs open heart surgery.
my heart goes out to those parents who may have one time refused a blood fraction or even an organ transplant for their children because they believed at the time that it was scriptural.
One of the things that i could not reconcile,which led to my disassociating myself was this:
I have a daughter that needs open heart surgery. My heart goes out to those parents who may have one time refused a blood fraction or even an organ transplant for their children because they believed at the time that it was scriptural. Lets say that they lost a loved one because of their stand. How an earth would they have felt when these policies were reversed and it became ok to have many blood fractions/transplants that were once 'unscriptural.' Their precious little ones died for nothing.
Has anyone on this site ever experienced or heard of a situation like this????
Chukky
its my experience after actually being an elder for a number of years that there are in fact...two types of elder.. type 1....genuine, actually cares about the people in the congregation and wasn't actually bothered too much if he became an elder or not.. type 2....very legalistic, cares more about organizational laws rather than people and lacks compassion and empathy.
this type is more of a spiritual policeman.
he wanted desperately to be an elder and now that he is, he loves the sense of power and prestige.. this has been my experience and if there are more type 2 elders on a body, the results can be disastrous.. what has been your experience???
Hi
Its my experience after actually being an elder for a number of years that there are in fact...two types of elder.
TYPE 1....Genuine, actually cares about the people in the congregation and wasn't actually bothered too much if he became an elder or not.
TYPE 2....Very legalistic, cares more about organizational laws rather than people and lacks compassion and empathy. This type is more of a spiritual policeman. He wanted desperately to be an elder and now that he is, he loves the sense of power and prestige.
This has been my experience and if there are more type 2 elders on a body, the results can be disastrous.
What has been your experience??? Have you seen more TYPE 2 elders than TYPE 1????
Chukyy
my wife and i have been disassociated for about 2 months now.
every day in our small town we are being shunned by former friends.
one in particular annoyed me today.
Hi
My wife and I have been disassociated for about 2 months now. Every day in our small town we are being shunned by former friends. One in particular annoyed me today. It was an elder who's wife left him a few years ago. He was devastated and I was there for him for months afterward, sacrificing my time to help him when he was low, always there when he needed to get his feelings out. Today, as I passed him he glanced at me with a disdainful look as if I were skum. I am so angry.....what is it with these people???....it is so opposite to true christianity.
How do you deal with shunning and the feelings of anger???
i am so angry tonight.
there is an elder and his wife who have upset so many with cruel/biting comments.
one family of 14 moved away because of them.
The elder is the service overseer and he told a whole family (a particularly lovely family...2 of whom were pioneers)
to clear off!!!...the sooner that they went the better and he didn't care about any of them. Worse still, he said publicly at a wedding reception. All they had done was to complain about the clique that had formed around this elder.
This same elder /his family told my wife that it was better for his 5 yr old not to associate too much with my 5 yr old because my 5 yr old is disabled and too much association could hinder his childs development...he even told his kid not to play with mine in school. His family also informed my little girl that she had a heart problem....
What really makes me angry is that there are so many other things that he has done...but nothing was ever done to him because he is 'in' with the other elders.....so when I hear he has given a talk on "LOVE'....yes i do feel like hitting him
nick
i went to take my daughter to school today and right at the end of her line was a jw with her child.
seeing as i had to take my child to her line, i had to stand very close to her.
i seen her out of the corner of my eye looking at me.
I went to take my daughter to school today and right at the end of her line was a JW with her child. Seeing as I had to take my child to her line, I had to stand very close to her. I seen her out of the corner of my eye looking at me. With that, in a deliberate sort of movement that was meant to be seen, she turned her back and walked about 15 ft away and stood there instead. This same person went out of JW's a few years ago and got married in a church...but was never disfellowshipped and yet...she can do this without a pang of conscience. Talk about hypocrisy!!!!
My wofe and I have to see at least 3 witnesses on the school run everyday and they treat us like we are skum.
Shunning in there case is NOT a loving provision...it is done with a spirit of hate. Has that been the case in your experience too????
i am so angry tonight.
there is an elder and his wife who have upset so many with cruel/biting comments.
one family of 14 moved away because of them.
I am so angry tonight. There is an elder and his wife who have upset so many with cruel/biting comments. One family of 14 moved away because of them. My wife and I disassociated ourselves because of their cruelty, and another brother/sister are going to move away because of them. Nothing has been done about them, because of the remaining 5 elders, 4 are in their social clique....he is still up there giving talks....so self righteous and I just honestly want to do something physical...like beat him to a pulp....please help me!!!!!!!
