Posts by DHL

73

D'Fing and Love

by I-CH-TH-U-S in

jw
friends

i once talked to a jw about disfellowshipping and was curious to how can this be showing a christly love when you all out turn your back on them.

he gave me an answer about rightousness and unrightrousness having no fellowship (which is biblical) but it didnt make sense to me.

didnt seem applicable in many ways.

DHL

It is easier to see how the d'fing works to the advantage of the sinner when the sin is breaking God's moral laws.

Anewme, this is something I never understood:

If god's law has been broken then why do humans interfere? Why don't they leave it up to him to love or to punish. Does their belief in god include the belief that he is unable to get it done without the help of humans or a human organisation? Shouldn't humans just live and let live and leave the rest up to their god?

I also never understood the point how d'fing could help someone. The only result of d'fing as far as I can see it is suffering as it cuts people off even their closest relationships. Does pain help anybody? And if feeling pain makes a person change his mind then what is d'fing other than emotional blackmail (that is: I will hurt you to press you into changing your mind)?

73

D'Fing and Love

by I-CH-TH-U-S in

jw
friends

i once talked to a jw about disfellowshipping and was curious to how can this be showing a christly love when you all out turn your back on them.

he gave me an answer about rightousness and unrightrousness having no fellowship (which is biblical) but it didnt make sense to me.

didnt seem applicable in many ways.

DHL

D'Fing isn't love. It's emotional blackmail as it always is combined with conditions (like: do this and you can come back, do that and we won't talk to you).

Love never sets people apart. Instead it brings them together by giving them a common basis. Whatever sets people (families, friends, partners) apart can't be love.

Love is about accepting other peoples values and decisions and loving them for what they are not for what we want them to be like.

If I tell someone he/she has to behave and decide in a certain way to come up to my expectations then I am not loving. Not at all!

41

well they did not reinstate me!! dont know how i feell!

by Cordelia in

jw
friends

well any of u that read my post about reinstatement will know what im on about basically i put my letter in for my family ive been dfed since march and they so want me back,.

but the lovely elders took a month to get back to me and then said they were gonna leave it as i have the wrong motive as i am doing it for my family not jehovah, (which of course i am but they werent meant toknow that!

) thing is in my reinstatement meeting i knew exactly what i was doing i knew exactly what i should not and should say and said all the wrong things because i didnt want it,.

DHL

Cordelia,

Seems, your father wants nothing else from you but your life. He asks you to not decide the way YOU want to but how HE wants it. He seems to not a bit be interested in YOUR desires. So if you gave in to this you would make "a deal with the devil", as you would sell your soul (plus eventually lose your bf) to please your father. Don't you think he wants you to pay more than you can afford? Are you ready to pay?

I seem harsh but I have gone through this, too, and I know exactly how (devastating) it feels. But in the end I stood firm for me because I wanted to be able to look me straight in the eyes whenever I look into a mirror.

Love Debbie

25

They wonder why they are losing people???

by LongHairGal in

i have to laugh at how hard they try to bring people in by knocking on doors and rv's - but once the people are in they are pushing them out the back door with both hands!

we all remember how hard it was to stay there (even if you believed it all) - let alone the head-trips they put you through!!

listen to this.

DHL

That is very common in the organization. I have seen several elders with wifes 12 years younger than them.

That makes it easier for the guy to feel like "head of the household" as a much younger wife tends to look up at him and wouldn't dare to question his position.

46

long years of brainwashing finally come to an end.....

by girl_interrupted in

hi everyone, i'm new here......basically, i found this website a couple of weeks ago when i was in dire need of some like-minded souls who had felt screwed up about the jw's.

from about the age of four/five, my parents and i were involved in the organisation, and all three of us are stil messed up because of it.....we are no longer involved in it, but it took quite a few years before my parents found the strength to leave.

to begin with, i was quite a zealous jw, was baptised at twelve and disfellowshipped at fourteen, because as i got older i began to grow ''weak in the truth'' as people so kindly described me!

DHL

The world has some great people and great experiences, but I can't live my life without purpose.

I can leave at anytime I want. If I am wrong, then at worst I lead a good life, enjoyed friendships with ones all over the world, and can count myself as a moral person. (One of the few moral 21 year olds).

People outside JW don't have/can't find purpose in their life? Plus they don't have any moral standards?

Jehovah directs the organization, but makes adjustments slowly when we are ready for them.

Aha, JW became more and more intelligent over the last 100 years so their god dares to make slow adjustments every now and then. JW can be really thankful for such a kind god! Well, maybe their god should make some slow adjustments towards getting rid of prejudices. He will probably do so as soon as JW will get ready for such an adjustment.

Btw: Hello and welcome, girl!

56

What songs stand the test of time?

by JV in

jw
friends

seeing as i'm dowloading songs so i can blast them at the neighbour kids, i was thinking, what songs stand the test of time?

what songs do you listen to over and over again and never get tired of.

here's my list.. if you tolerate this - manic street preachers.

DHL

"River deep mountain high" by Tina Turner and Phil Spector is a song I never get tired of. "Free your mind" by En Vogue hits me any time with it's energy.

It's great to read your lists. You remind me of some songs I havn't heard for ages and would love to. "Silent lucidity" for example was fabulous track.

Just before Easter I walked by a church and from the outside I heard the church choir training. They sung this classical track "Halleluja". I guess it's from Händel. I walked into the church and listened with tears in my eyes because the music and singing was so moving. There's so much wonderful music out there. I wouldn't want to miss any.

2

Consciousness Rules.

by frankiespeakin in

jw
friends

.

interesting essay for some:.

http://www.consciousnessrules.net/

DHL

GOLDEN RULES OF DIFFERENT SPIRITUAL/ETHICAL SYSTEMS
HINDU: This is the sum of duty; do naught unto others which if done to thee would cause thee pain.
ZOROASTRIAN: That nature alone is good which refrains from doing unto another whatsoever is not
good for itself.
TAOIST: Regard your neighbour's gain as your own gain, and your neighbour's loss as your own loss.
BUDDHIST: Hurt not others in ways that you
would find hurtful.
CONFUCIAN: Do not unto others what you would not have them do unto you.
JAIN: In happiness and suffering, in joy and grief, we should regard all creatures as we regard our own self.
JEWISH: Whatever thou hatest thyself, that do not to another.
CHRISTIAN: All things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them.
ISLAMIC: No one of you is a believer until he desires for his brother that which he desires
for himself.
SIKH: As thou deemest thyself, so deem others.
WICCAN: Do what thou wilt, but harm no other.
LIBERTARIAN: You are free to do as you like as long as you do not initiate force or fraud on others.

The world would sure enough be a much better place if people regardless of their religious background decided to just follow this one of their own rules.

153

Why do/don't you believe in God

by LouBelle in

jw
friends

now for all the scientists out there this is not a question of proof or anything along those lines.

for my part i choose to believe in a god because i honestly believe there is one (though i did start doubting for a little while) i've always felt that there was more to our existance on earth - and that doesn't stem from me wanting to live forever or as a spirit, as i don't even know if that will happen.

i also believe in him because many many times when i could not carry on, on my own strength, i managed to pulled through.

DHL

how else would you explain my being here?

Hmmmh, Mary, I would have sworn your mommy and daddy... But, well...

16

Ever thought about all the ways Jw's judge?

by AK - Jeff in

it seems that it is done to elevate themselves, isn't it?

worldly people are;.

all immoral.

DHL

IMO the worst JW judging is: "Your good deeds only count if you are a loyal JW. Mother Theresa - just forget about her. All her deeds won't help her survive the big A as she ~~didn't use the right label~~ wasn't a JW."

153

Why do/don't you believe in God

by LouBelle in

jw
friends

now for all the scientists out there this is not a question of proof or anything along those lines.

for my part i choose to believe in a god because i honestly believe there is one (though i did start doubting for a little while) i've always felt that there was more to our existance on earth - and that doesn't stem from me wanting to live forever or as a spirit, as i don't even know if that will happen.

i also believe in him because many many times when i could not carry on, on my own strength, i managed to pulled through.

DHL

I don't believe in any god. I don't believe in any kind of big brother watching me, controlling me, blessing or cursing me.

Through my own spiritual experiences I learned about love being the ultimate creative force. It is always available to all of us, we exist through it (bodily functions). And we can increase its availability to us (if we want more strength or deeper understanding) by consciously open up to it. Some do that by praying (to a god, goddess, angels etc.) others by meditating, tai chi or whatever. Whatever method works for one can be used. None is better than another. No need for guilt trips, no need to give it a name, no need to participate in an organisation or pay for it. It's for free.

(Sometimes we want to find deeper understanding by braining and struggle!)